"Deed, I canna guess," said the husband, resting musingly on his spade.
"Aweel," rejoined his helpmate, "I hae lost a note; but dinna be angry—for we ought to be mair than thankfu' that we had ane to lose!"
The Philosophy of Battle and Victory
During the long French war two old ladies in Scotland were going to the kirk. The one said to the other: "Was it no' a wonderful thing that Breetish were aye victorious in battle?"
"Not a bit," said the other lady; "dinna ye ken the Breetish aye say their prayers before gaun into battle?"
The other replied: "But canna the French say their prayers as weel?"
The reply was most characteristic. "Hoot! sic jabberin' bodies; wha could understand them if thae did?"
Patriotism and Economy
When Sir John Carr was at Glasgow, in the year 1807, he was asked by the magistrates to give his advice concerning the inscription to be placed on Nelson's monument, then just completed. The knight recommended this brief record: "Glasgow to Nelson."