Here the little boy walked on to the stage with a pewter gill stoup, and thus delivered himself:
"It's just the whusky, Mr. Walls, and I couldna get ony at fourpence, so yer awn the landlord a penny, an' he says it's time you were payin' whet's doon i' the book."
The roars of laughter which followed from both audience and actors for some time prevented the further progress of the play.
The Shape of the Earth
A country schoolmaster of the old time was coaching his pupils for the yearly examination by the clergymen of the district. He had before him the junior geography class.
"Can any little boy or girl tell me what is the shape of the earth?"
To this there was no answer.
"Oh, dear me, this is sad! What wull the minister sink o' this? Well, I'll gie you a token to mind it. What is the shape o' this snuff-box in ma han'?"
"Square, sir," replied all.
"Yes; but on the Sabbath, when a shange ma claes, I shange ma snuff-box, and I wears a round one. Will you mind that for a token?"