Boots: "Yes, sir, please, sir; Musical Conversazione over the way at the Shire Hall, sir. Half-a-crown admission, sir. Very nice, sir."
Commercial: "Ah, nice music, I dare say; I don't care for such things. Is there nothing else, Boots?"
Boots: "Yes, sir, please, sir; Popular Entertainment at Corn Exchange, admission one penny; gentlemen pay sixpence to front seats, sir, if they please, sir."
Commercial: "Intensely vulgar! Are there no other amusements in this confoundedly dull town?"
Boots: "Yes, sir, please sir; railway station at each end of the town—walk down and see the trains come in."
A Descriptive Hymn
A minister in Orkney having been asked by the Rev. Mr. Spark, minister of St. Magnus, to conduct service in his church, and also to baptize his infant daughter, gave out for singing, before the baptismal service, a portion of the fifth paraphrase, beginning:
"As sparks in quick succession rise."
As Mr. Spark's help-mate was a fruitful vine, and presented him with a pledge of her affection every year, the titter among the congregation was unmistakable and irresistible.