The tragical acts, or comical tragedies of Punch and Judy

by W. J. Judd

Teddy. One place to sleep?

Schmidt. Yaw. Who keeps this hotel?

Teddy. My mistress, sar—Mrs. Barrisnobe.

Schmidt. Then call that old basket up.

Teddy. She is neither old nor a basket, sar.

Schmidt. Yaw! Vell, basket or no basket, call the old woman up.

Teddy. What might your name be, sir?

Schmidt. I am John Schmidt.

Teddy. I thought John Smith was dead.

Schmidt. No humbug! I am te original John Schmidt.