One flask of brandy for emergencies (as my heart is intermittent again).
Prussic acid next.
Must have been near pneumonia at R——. Auntie was nervous, and came in during the night to see how I was.
June 20.
It caused me anguish to see my article returned from the Fortnightly and lying in a big envelope on the table when I returned home this evening. I can't do any work because of it, and in desperation rushed off to the stately pleasure domes of the White City, and systematically went through all the thrills—from the Mountain Railway to the Wiggle Woggle and the 'Witching Waves.
June 21.
To-day I am easier. The cut worm forgives the plough. But how restless this disappointment has made me.... I have no plans for recuperation and cannot settle down to work.
July 6.
On my doctor's advice, went to see Dr. P——, a lung specialist. M——found a dull spot on one of my lungs, and, not feeling very sure, and without telling me the nature of his suspicion, he arranged for Dr. P—— to see me, allowing me to suppose he was a stomach authority as my dyspepsia is bad.
Well: it is not consumption, but my lungs and physique are such that consumption might easily supervene. As soon as Dr. P—— had gone, M——appended the following lugubrious yarn:—