Spanswick was not in “The World Turned Upside Down,” but the three had a drink there, because it would be notoriously a gross breach of etiquette to go from a public-house without ordering refreshment; to do this were to deride the landlord openly, and insinuate libels on his stock. At the next place the three went into each bar to make sure, and, having money in their pockets, it seemed like doing the thing well and completely to have a drink here in every bar, still discussing the painful case of poor old Spanny, regretting deeply the curse that liquor brought upon men who could not use it with discretion.
“It’s good servant,” said Old Jim, raising his glass and shutting one eye in order to see it clearly, “but bad mas’er. That’s what I always says about it. It’s a good mas’r, but— What I mean to say is it’s a bad servant—”
“Every man,” declared Kirby, attempting to slap the counter, but missing it, “ought to know where to draw line.”
“The chap who don’t,” agreed Payne, “(You’re upsetting your glass, Jim, old man)—the chap who don’t is like the beas’s of field.”
“Worse!” said Old Jim.
“No, not worse!” urged Payne obstinately.
“Fight you for it,” offered Old Jim.
Kirby interfered and made peace, and throughout the evening, wherever they went in search of Spanswick, it happened that some two of the three were always quarrelling, whilst the third endeavoured to appease and conciliate. They were on the very edge of a triangular dispute in the last house of call when Payne, sobering himself for a moment, pointed out to the others that it was closing time, and they must not go to bed without feeling that something accomplished, something done, had earned a night’s repose; necessary that they should proceed now with as much directness as possible to Spanswick’s house, and (if they found him) there deliver the calculated words of warning, the prepared sentences of advice.
“’Ullo, old man,” said Payne, as the door of Spanswick’s house opened. “Many ’appy returns day.”
“What’s all this?” demanded Spanswick coldly. “Brought anything with you in a bottle?”