The speaker was keen-eyed and shrewd, and well knew how to use sophistry in pathos and wit. She expounded to the audience the doctrine of Satan under whose service she was pledged to loyalty.
“We are all missionaries,” she commenced, “and cannot escape the responsibility which is imposed upon us. Our duty is imperative. We stand at the open door of opportunity and enter so slowly into the fields of work all around us. When one sees rank bigotry and narrow-mindedness on every hand, he feels like blushing that he ever sent money to convert the heathen in far-away lands. The heathen at our own doors are more blood-thirsty than the cannibals of distant climes. I appeal to you all, noble women especially, to rid your minds of the fallacy of foreign work and do the foreign work at home, even inside your own doors. (Applause, principally among the men, in which Mr. World heartily joined.) I must confess that, at one time, I was almost overcome by this craze of evangelizing the world. My delusion went so far that I could see visions of China, Africa, or the remote islands of the sea, and even imagine that I heard voices calling me thither. One night I dreamed a dream, the kindest of them all. I saw a woman standing on the shore of a river, her children drowning at her side. But she, unmindful of her own blood, was hastening to launch a boat into the stream that she might rescue a sinking dog on the farther shore. “Ungrateful wretch,” I cried aloud on my bed so that I was awakened by my own voice. I was so moved by the dream that I could sleep no more that night, but sought for some one to make known unto me the interpretation thereof. I soon learned, to my personal shame, that I was that woman. I then and there vowed that I would no more be guilty of so great a crime. (Great applause, with cries of “noble decision!” “common sense!”) From that hour I assure you that I have been trying to evangelize the world—not the one across the river, (applause) but the one on this side. (Applause.)
“I have been working at my own home and find a task almost too great for me to do. If I should ever see the day when I get through with my own family, including my husband, (great applause among the women) I can then commence busying myself with my neighbors’ affairs and tell them also how to become perfect. (Laughter and applause.)
“God never made a greater world than when he instituted the home. The woman who becomes inspired with international evangelization would do well if she would learn how to season victuals and cook them aright (shouting and applause among the men) and to give proper care to her home and her children. This is home missionary work.” (Continued applause.) The speaker was about to be seated, but the applause was rising, so she stepped forward again. “If this kind of missionary work be adopted, then the church will no longer be drained by repeated collections for missionary work, and that money will flow into better channels and prove an impetus to trade.” She stepped quickly from the stage while the final burst of applause rang loud and prolonged.
“That was the greatest and most sensible missionary speech to which I have ever listened in my life,” chuckled Mr. World as he was moving toward the door with his companion.
I learned from Blackana that this Missionary College of the Devil has wrought great mischief in the missionary operations of the church, ad that Satan glories in the fact that he has succeeded in sending these nefarious doctrines to the hearts of so many church-members and thereby kept a large part of the world in spiritual darkness.
Then I took a passing glance at the King’s Highway and saw a shining pilgrim communing with God and casting his eyes over the hills of Time, looking for the coming of his Redeemer. From his lips this prayer arose, like sweet incense to Heaven: “O God, hasten the day when thy church will unite and go forth into all the world to preach the Gospel, instead of so large a part of it giving ear to the teaching of Satan’s missionary schools, thereby delaying the coming of thy dear Son!”
CHAPTER XX.
THE RIVAL CHURCHES.
1. The two companions visit a church on the By-Path and are disgusted.
2. Then they are delighted with the services of the Church of the World whose minister they visit.