Kussowlee, May 4th, 1851.
Your budget of letters reached me on the 2d. It is very pleasant to receive these warm greetings, and it refreshes me when bothered, or overworked, or feverish, or disgusted. I look forward to a visit to England and home with a pleasure which nothing but six years of exile can give.
The Governor-General has at last advanced me to the higher grade of "Assistants" to Commissioners. The immediate advantage is an increase of pay,—the real benefit, that it brings me nearer the main step of a Deputy Commissioner in charge of a district. It is satisfactory, not the less so that it was extorted from him by the unanimity of my official superiors in pressing the point upon him, Mr. Edmonstone having commenced attacking him in my favor before I had been under him four months. I am not in love with the kind of employment,—I long with no common earnestness for the more military duties of my old friends the "Guides;" but I am not therefore insensible to the advantages of doing well in this line of work. Ambition alone would dictate this, for my success in this civil business (which is considered the highest and most arduous branch of the public service) almost insures my getting on in any other hereafter.
To Rev. E. Harland.
Kussowlee, June 11th, 1851.
I fancy the change is as great in myself as in either. The old visions of boyhood have given place to the vehement aspirations of a military career and the interests of a larger ambition. I thirst now not for the calm pleasures of a country life, the charms of society, or a career of ease and comfort, but for the maddening excitement of war, the keen contest of wits involved in dealing with wilder men, and the exercise of power over the many by force of the will of the individual. Nor am I, I hope, insensible to the vast field for good and for usefulness which these vast provinces offer to our energies, and to the high importance of the trust committed to our charge.
To his Father.
Kussowlee, Oct 20th, 1851.