Until I was sixteen the most exalted person I’d ever met in my life was a London County Councillor. I’m not quite sure if I know how to behave with royal personages.

Jack Straw.

Why on earth don’t you buy a book on etiquette? I always carry one about with me.

Ethel.

Mother bought several when you said you’d come down.

Jack Straw.

I wonder if she’s got the same as mine. You know I never can remember to call a serviette a napkin.

Ethel.

Mamma’s very particular about that.

Jack Straw.