Jack Straw: A Farce in Three Acts

by W. Somerset Maugham

I’ll bear whatever else you say with fortitude. We’ll pretend that you’re just Miss So-and-So.

Ethel.

As in point of fact, I am.

Jack Straw.

And that I’m—Jack Straw.

Ethel.

[Surprised.] Why on earth Jack Straw?

Jack Straw.

[Indifferently.] It’s the name of a public-house in Hampstead. Pray go on.

Ethel.