Jack Straw: A Farce in Three Acts

by W. Somerset Maugham

I have no intention whatever of stirring from this spot.

Jack Straw.

I’ve been wondering for the last week what I should do if I signified his dismissal to any one, and he flatly refused to go. Very awkward, isn’t it?

Lady Wanley.

Mahomet and the mountain isn’t in it.

Jack Straw.

Of course a hundred years ago I’d have cast him into a dungeon. But, between ourselves, I don’t happen to have a dungeon handy.

Holland.

Now look here, we’ve had enough of this nonsense. The joke has gone far enough. Are you going or not?

Jack Straw.