Penelope: A Comedy in Three Acts

by W. Somerset Maugham

Mrs. Golightly.

[Taking out the telegram.] “Come at once! Grave scandal! Central African Mission. Penelope.”

Barlow.

But that’s absurd. You know how stupid the Post Office is. They must have made a mistake. I know that the Pomeranian Royal Family is very odd, but there are limits, and I can’t imagine the Archduchess Anastasia being mixed up in a scandal with a Central African missionary.

Beadsworth.

Well, my wire merely said: “Come at once; six and eightpence. Penelope.”

Barlow.

Six and eightpence! Why six and eightpence?

Beadsworth.

I don’t know. That is why I lost no time in coming.