The Bishop's Apron: A study in the origins of a great family

by W. Somerset Maugham

“Gin?”

She smiled broadly and in a voice that was almost caressing, answered: “Call it white satin, my lord.”

“White satin?”

“It’s a funny thing now, but rum never ’as agreed with me; an’ it’s wholesome stuff, you know.”

“I have no doubt,” said Theodore, politely.

“The last time I ’ad a little drop—oh, I was queer. Now, my friend, Mrs. Cooper, can’t touch anything else.”

“Come, come, that’s very strange.”

“You don’t know Mrs. Cooper, do you? Oh, she’s such a nice woman. And she’s got such a dear little ’ouse in Shepherd’s Bush.”

“A salubrious neighbourhood, I believe,” said Canon Spratte, with a courteous bow.

“Oh, yes, the tube ’as made a great difference to it. You ought to know Mrs. Cooper. Oh, she’s a nice woman and a thorough lady. No one can say a word against ’er, I don’t care who it is!”