“Yet a singed worm will twist,” submit Arthur. “Would Gov. Haskle make sweet-dog smile to Hon. Roosevelt when he are enjoying all them delicious scratches?”
“Perhapsly might,” am regard I make.
“What-say famous saw-wisdom?” require Arthur. “It-say, ‘Scratch a Russian and you strike a Tartar.’”
“Scratch a Senator and you strike Oil,” are smart quotation for Japanese Schoolboy.
Hon. Roosevelt have just called Hon. Bryan a Chimera. That were a very mean curse. A Chimera, Mr. Editor, are a horid nature-fake discovered in a vacant lott by Baccus, a prominent Greek drunkard. This queery mammal start in to resemble a goat, but he lost interest in the subjeck about the middle of his body, so he continue on backwards in a squimyform appendix to look like a bow constricktor. The goatly part of this beast, Mr. Editor, are mild and fond of common people and he love to nibble vegetarian diet in Utopia where he live; but the rear extension of that Chimera continue to point in the direction of Wall Street where it make wig-wag signals of distress. The farm-yard part of them Chimera were born in 1896, but the wiggly part were nailed on at the Denver Convention this year.
Hon. John Burro say that animals do not think. The Chimera are an animal. Hon. Roosevelt agree with John Burro on all subjecks.
Hon. Hearst, when he discover Hon. Haskle and Hon. Forker in act of Standard Oiling, done a pretty fine servis to this kingdom of America. When I think of all that good he done I extend my hand to Hon. Hearst—and then apologize to my Hand. That were a pretty nice stab which Hon. Hearst made, not because he hated Haskle less, but because he hated Bryan more.
S. Wanda, Japanese Socialist, say that Hon. Hearst done what he did for love of truth & justis. Hope so he did! But when Hon. Hearst do things for love of truth & justis I enjoy suspicious feeling of elbow. I am reminded of a mustylogical legend of antique Japan.
Ten thousand entire years before Hon. Darwin discovered monkeys in England there reside in Kyoto a politician name Suki-ho who run for Supervisor on Democratick ticket & was beat by a nother politician name Yen-Yen. When this result was happened Hon. Suki-ho enjoy such angry rages he turn entirely blue & blow smoke through ears. Oftenly he motter, “I make a lay-to for this Yen-Yen.”
One day when it was serious heat of July Hon. Suki-ho meet a entirely mad dog & enjoy being bit on ankle.