CONTENTS
| I. | Our Noble Allies | [3] |
| II. | The Honourable War Cloud | [11] |
| III. | The Yellow Peril | [19] |
| IV. | Lady Suffergettes and How They Do It | [26] |
| V. | The Financial Breakdown | [37] |
| VI. | Hon. Niggers, Was They Freed by Lincoln? | [46] |
| VII. | Hon. Simple Life Among Ambassadors | [55] |
| VIII. | A Third Term for Our Emperor | [63] |
| IX. | Hon. Modesty: Is it a Disease? | [71] |
| X. | Spring | [80] |
| XI. | Education in American Language | [90] |
| XII. | The Visit of the Fleet to San Francisco | [98] |
| XIII. | Flighty Navigation of Air | [107] |
| XIV. | The Conventional Meeting of Reps in Chicago | [118] |
| XV. | America’s Bang up Ceremony | [128] |
| XVI. | Can Africa Wait till March 4th? | [138] |
| XVII. | The Hon. Gasolene | [149] |
| XVIII. | America’s Base Game of Ball | [159] |
| XIX. | Is a Vice-Pres Nearly a King? | [169] |
| XX. | My Conception of the Presidency | [179] |
| XXI. | How American Advertisement Does It | [189] |
| XXII. | Olympus Games and International Cement | [196] |
| XXIII. | Outside Exercises for Health | [207] |
| XXIV. | Can Hon. North Pole be Detected? | [218] |
| XXV. | High Tariff on Princes | [227] |
| XXVI. | The Servant Problemb | [237] |
| XXVII. | The Feetsteps of Science | [247] |
| XXVIII. | The Hon. Mars | [256] |
| XXIX. | Standard Oiling across Party Lines | [265] |
| XXX. | The Hon. Bomb | [275] |
| XXXI. | Enjoyment of Hunger Among Poor Mans | [285] |
| XXXII. | The Alcoholic Temperance Movement | [295] |
| XXXIII. | The Saloon in Our Town | [304] |
| XXXIV. | Election Day | [313] |
| XXXV. | Fall Hats and the Ladies Inside of Them | [323] |
| XXXVI. | Feetball for Mollycuddles | [333] |
| XXXVII. | Will Hon. So. Dakota Be a Blissful Married State? | [342] |
| XXXVIII. | Hon. Mary Christmas | [352] |
| XXXIX. | The Annual New Year | [363] |
CHARACTERS CAST UP BY THIS BOOK
Hashimura Togo—35-year aged Japanese Schoolboy.
Cousin Nogi—educated in horseracing & relidgeon.
Arthur Kickahajama—missionary boy.
Hon. Strunsky—Irish salooner.
Uncle Nichi—Japanese strawseed who come to America to be less so.