The curtain went up. There was a roar of applause. Tommy Bung was ready for the audience and had already fallen into a tub of whitewash. The sorry object extricated itself. His red nose shone, star like. He rolled ferocious eyes at a girl. The crowd rocked with joy. Without a word the great Tommy Bang began to dance. At once the hall followed the splendid metre. Up and down, up and down, twisting, curvetting, Tommy Bung held his audience spellbound with rhythm. They swayed sharply with the alternations.
Victoria watched the Major. His hands were beating time. Tommy Bung brought his effort to a conclusion by beating the floor, the soles of his feet, the scenery, and punctuated the final thwack with a well timed leap on the prompter's box.
Victoria was losing touch with things. Waves of heat seemed to overwhelm her; little figures of jugglers, gymnasts, performing dogs, passed before her eyes like arabesques. Then again raucous voices. The crowd was applauding hysterically. It was Number Fourteen, whose great name she was fated never to know. Unsteadily poised on legs wide apart, Number Fourteen sang. Uncontrollable glee radiated from him—
Now kids is orl right
When yer ain't got none;
Yer can sit at 'ome
An' eat 'cher dam bun.
I've just 'ad some twins;
Nurse says don't be coy,
For they're just the picture
Of the lodger's boy.
Tinka, Tinka, Tinka; Tinka, Tinka, Tink
'It 'im in the eye and made the lodger blink.
Tinga, Tinga, Tinga; Tinga, Tinga, Teg
Never larfed so much since farver broke 'is leg.
A roar of applause encouraged him. Victoria saw Cairns carried away, clapping, laughing. In the bar below she could hear continuously the thud of the levers belching beer. Number Fourteen was still singing, his smile wide-slit through his face—
Now me paw-in-law
'E's a rum ole bloke;
Got a 'and as light
As a ton o' coke.
Came 'ome late one night
An' what oh did 'e see?
Saw me ma-in-law
On the lodger's knee.
Tinka, Tinka, Tinka; Tinka, Tinka, Tink
'It 'im in the eye an' made the lodger blink.
Tinga, Tinga, Tinga; Tinga, Tinga, Teg,
Never larfed so much since farver broke 'is leg.
Enthusiasm was rising high. Number Fourteen braced himself for his great effort on the effects of beer. Then, gracious and master of the crowd, he beat time with his hands while the chorus sounded from a thousand throats. Victoria happened to look at Cairns. His head was beating time and, from his lips issued gleefully:
Tinka, Tinka, Tinka; Tinka, Tinka, Tink
'It 'im in the eye—
Victoria scrutinised him narrowly. Cairns was a phenomenon.
'Never larfed so much since farver broke 'is leg,' roared Cairns. 'I say, Vic, he really is good.' He noticed her puzzled expression. 'I say, Vic, what's up? Don't you like him?'