Decline and Fall

by Waugh Evelyn

In darkness the two dons crept to the window. The quad below was a kaleidoscope of dimly discernible faces.

'There must be fifty of them at least, said Mr Postlethwaite. 'If only they were all members of the College! Fifty of them at ten pounds each. Oh my!

'It'll be more if they attack the Chapel, said Mr Sniggs. 'Oh, please God, make them attack the Chapel.

'I wonder who the unpopular undergraduates are this term. They always attack their rooms. I hope they have been wise enough to go out for the evening.

'I think Partridge will be one; he possesses a painting by Matisse or some such name.

'And I'm told he has black sheets on his bed.

'And Sanders went to dinner with Ramsay MacDonald once.

'And Rending can afford to hunt, but collects china instead.

'And smokes cigars in the garden after breakfast.

'Austen has a grand piano.