But when one looks with open eyes at this observation and at another case of Hirschfeld’s,—an important contribution because it illustrates the whole inner condition of the homosexual,—it is not difficult to draw one’s own conclusions. One urning relates about his mother:
“In the midst of his worries he was suddenly embraced and kissed—his mother held him tightly in her arms; she drew his little face to her cheek and their tears mingled while she consoled him until his eyes again mirrored a smile. These were unforgettable experiences in the life of the homosexual child. He felt that his mother was his truest friend, and in his grateful heart he planned to recompense her above all other mothers. His whole life and hope was centered in her; it was for her sake that he was willing to prepare his school lessons, and because of her he avoided arousing his father’s wrath; he did not want her to be scolded on his account. To make her happy was his ambition in life. Because she was not happy, he felt as if it were his fault and with redoubled tenderness he clung to her, the quiet sufferer.
“He reached 16 years of age, he became sexually ripe and a perplexing unrest troubled him. His comrades told him about their gallant adventures. But he remained unresponsive to everything that seemed to make them so happy. On the contrary, he was terribly distressed when his best friend ‘betrayed’ him in favor of a girl. He began to be aware of his peculiarity and the terrible thought that he must hide his awful feelings made him tremble. He tried very hard to turn into the right path. But he could not live at home while harboring his secret; his mother, whom he loved above all else, he wanted to spare; he felt he had to leave; so he abandoned his home and went into the world trying to direct properly his sexual feelings. While away he received most tender messages from his mother to whom he wrote as to a beloved. After an absence of two years he returned home. From that time on his life developed under the eyes of his mother, in whom he saw the highest quintessence of all womanhood. His relations with women were marked by timidity. He adored them and felt he would like to serve them. He became early their confessor for his womanly soul made him their natural comrade. But in the midst of all he was very unhappy, his feelings for them never turned into physical love—the sexual attraction was absent.” (Hirschfeld, l. c., p. 105.)
This urning actually confessed, in his own words, that in his mother he saw the quintessence of all womanhood. The condition is obvious. Every woman represents the mother, in part. At first I had occasion to observe cases of this kind and that is how I came to the hasty conclusion that every homosexual is emotionally fixed upon his mother and avoids women because his inhibition towards them is due to the mother Imago which he carries within him.[45]
Another observation of Hirschfeld’s seems to me of very great interest:
“The great attachment of homosexuals to their mother as pointed out by Sadger and other followers of Freud is really a fact and holds true of nearly all homosexuals, the attachment reaching far back into their own childhood and extending over the mother’s whole life. We have seen that many who lost their mother at an advanced age, for a long time were unable to recover from the blow. But it seems more proper not to look upon this great attachment to the mother as the cause of homosexuality, but as a consequence thereof. Aside from this more feminine nature, absence of a home of his own keeps the homosexual for a longer time than usual close to his mother, especially when she possesses a more pronounced personality, which is rather not unusual where the children are homosexual. Urnings who contract marriage are not wound up emotionally in their mother quite to such an extent and often their love is transferred to their wife.” (Hirschfeld, l. c., p. 344.)
With these words and the admission of the transference of the love for the mother to some other female person Hirschfeld recognizes the possibility of healing the condition, which is the psychoanalyst’s task. But I must warn against any tendency to solve the problem of homosexuality on the basis of any single finding.
In the first place I must point out that the history of these cases discloses two types of motherhood: the strong mother and the weak mother. Both types are common and either or both may determine the growth of the child. Hirschfeld states that the urning becomes readily attached to the mother who is strong. This corresponds with my practical observations and shows one type of homosexuality which I shall presently describe. The strong mother dominates a weak child throughout his life, he never escapes her and she determines his relations to other women.