Farm Boys and Girls

by William A. McKeever

2. Bad companionships for boys. Similar warnings as those given above need to be sounded with reference to the young country boys, and others as well. Farm boys are necessarily much in the company of men of very common tastes and low ideals. They hear not a little evil conversation and profanity, as it is used by such men. As a result, there will be need of much constructive teaching at home. Admonitions, warnings, and advice will be necessary.

In every instance it is well for the parents to remind the boy of the great interest they have in his welfare, of how deeply he may grieve them by taking up any of the evil practices in question, and of the high ideal which they hold in mind for his future.

Farm parents will need to keep up an intimate and frank exchange of ideas with their youthful son on the general subjects discussed in this chapter. They may ask him to repeat all he has heard and to relate all he has seen, good and bad, they then offering their corrections and admonitions. The especial danger is that the boy may acquire evil forms of speech, pernicious ideas for his secret thoughts, and a too low estimate of the worth of humanity. The vile companion is especially inclined to make the youth believe that there is no purity of character among girls and women—a most lamentable state of mind for a boy or a man of any age.

The boy in the country is not only very much in danger of having his mind contaminated by the evil speech and the evil misinformation mentioned above, but there is always the possibility of his being enticed by some older and depraved companion into the company of evil women. Strange to say, there are a few men who seem to plan deliberately this form of downfall for innocent boys and to regard the success of their vile plot in the light of a mere joke. It is perhaps a fault of society that such men are permitted to run at large. And it is especially the fault of fathers if such men keep company with their boys. No matter how excellent the family history, how well-born the boy may be, and how carefully he has been admonished, there is always some danger of his yielding to an evil sex temptation—a situation which the parent should always be watchful about and ready to meet.

3. Secret sex habits.—It is probable that country boys are more prone to secret perversions of their sex life than are city boys. The enforced solitude of the former and the increased opportunities for such secret evil may be accountable for the difference. In any event, there is necessity of constant watchfulness, and that especially until the son has reached comparative maturity of the physical body. The danger is at its height at the beginning of the adolescent period, fourteen to sixteen years of age. But the preparation for meeting the possible sex perversion should be begun very early and consist in frank talks and admonitions. The small boy’s questions about the origin of life must be answered frankly but only to the extent of imparting to him enough information to satisfy his present curiosity. Thus to satisfy his childish curiosity will prove a means of counteracting the evil influences of the bad companionships referred to above. Then, the youth needs to be shown some instances of the ruinous effects of sex perversion in boys and men, together with the inculcation of the idea that any such evil practice will cut off the possibility of his realizing the high standards of moral character set for him. It is well also to remember that prevention of the boy’s misuse of his sex life is comparatively easy and that cure is extremely difficult.

4. The so-called bad habits.—When we speak of the “bad habits” among boys and men we are inclined to think of swearing, smoking, and the use of intoxicants. Without thought of defending the practice of profanity, we may say that it is often acquired in an innocent fashion and that it ordinarily implies no conscious or intentional evil. That is, it is usually not so bad in its actual analysis as it sounds to the listener. Moreover, it is a habit which many boys take up and afterwards discontinue when once they have set up for themselves high standards of manliness.

With juvenile smoking the case is different. Without the thought of offending the adult smoker or defending adult smoking, we may say with a high degree of certainty that the use of tobacco is extremely hurtful to growing boys. It weakens and deranges the organic processes, leaves its deleterious effects in the throat, eyes, and lungs, and breaks down the natural constitutional defense so essential in time of such diseases as pneumonia and typhoid fever. On the mental side, tobacco lessens the boy’s ability to study. Very wide investigations have shown that the habitual smokers among school boys rank low in scholarship; that they are prone to fail in their classes and quit the schools; that almost none of them take high rank as students. The moral effects are even worse. In times of temptation the young boy who smokes is more inclined to yield and to choose the worse form of conduct instead of the better. He lacks especially that fine sense of inner worth so necessary for the one who would succeed in arousing his own moral courage sufficiently to withstand the temptations that naturally beset young life. The rural parents will not of course despair about the boy or turn against him should they discover that he has secretly become confirmed in the use of tobacco. There are still possibilities of his development into a substantial character; but because of his smoking the problem becomes a much more involved and difficult one.

All that has just been said in reference to tobacco may be emphasized many fold in respect to intoxicants. To allow a growing boy to begin the use of intoxicating drink in any form seems to be wholly indefensible. However, if there are open saloons in the adjoining town or city, even the best country boys are always somewhat in danger of taking the first false step. Rural parents must not be satisfied with the thought that their boy is “too good” to take up such a thing; they must be assured that he is not doing so. Now, the only way to obtain such assurance is by means of keeping in intimate touch with the boy and his movements—by knowing when and where he goes, why he goes there, and whom he meets in the various places visited on his rounds. Thus, he may be saved from a life of debauch and degradation, and that by means of providing carefully that he reach his full maturity of mind and body without any knowledge of the taste of intoxicating drinks.

A center of community life

As explained in a number of preceding chapters, there are being carried out several plans for bringing about a social awakening in the farm districts. Some of these are succeeding admirably, especially the county Y.M.C.A., and in a few instances the rural church. But presumably there are many thousands of country districts wherein these helpful agencies will not be found for many years to come. So, in the following lines there will be an attempt to furnish detailed methods and suggestions to rural parents who are under the necessity of assisting their own children in a social way. The discussion thus far has been of a somewhat destructive order. Now, something of a constructive nature will be offered.