“Didn’t you ever wonder why my wife did not come here?”
“Why should I wonder? Plenty of fellows have to spend half the year apart from their wives; the only thing in your case I couldn’t understand was the necessity for your doing it. For you know that’s all nonsense about your want of funds.”
“It isn’t nonsense, Johnny. But now, if you like, I will tell you why my wife has never come here.”
Then he told the story, out there under the stars, with no thought of interruption, for there was a world of moving water around them. It was the first time he had let any one into his confidence, and perhaps the darkness aided his revelations; but at any rate he went over all the old time, until it seemed to his companion that he was talking to himself, so aimless and desultory were his pathetic reminiscences. He called her Sheila, though Eyre had never heard her name. He spoke of her father as though Eyre must have known him. And yet this rambling series of confessions and self-reproaches and tender memories did form a certain sort of narrative, so that the young fellow sitting quietly in the boat there got a pretty fair notion of what had happened.
“You are an unlucky fellow,” he said to Lavender. “I never heard anything like that. But you know you must have exaggerated a good deal about it. I should like to hear her story. I am sure you could not have treated her like that.”
“God knows how I did, but the truth is just as I have told you; and although I was blind enough at the time, I can read the whole story now in letters of fire. I hope you will never have such a thing constantly before your eyes, Johnny.”
The lad was silent for some time, and then he said, rather timidly, “Do you think, Lavender, she knows how sorry you are?”
“If she did, what good would that do?” said the other.
“Women are awfully forgiving, you know,” Johnny said, in a hesitating fashion. “I—I don’t think it is quite fair not to give her a chance—a chance of—of being generous, you know. You know, I think the better a woman is, the more inclined she is to be charitable to other folks who mayn’t be quite up to the mark, you know; and you see, it ain’t every one who can claim to be always doing the right thing; and the next best thing to that is to be sorry for what you’ve done and try to do better. It’s rather cheeky, you know, my advising you, or trying to make you pluck up your spirits; but I’ll tell you what it is, Lavender, if I knew her well enough, I’d go straight to her to-morrow, and I’d put in a good word for you, and tell her some things she doesn’t know; and you’d see if she wouldn’t write you a letter, or even come and see you.”
“That is all nonsense, Johnny, though its very good of you to think of it. The mischief I have done isn’t to be put aside by the mere writing of a letter.”