I received your letter yesterday through John Turner, with another the same day from Amsterdam through Mr. W., savouring of the place whence it came. And indeed, the many discouragements I find here, together with the demurs there, made me say I would give up my accounts to John Carver, and at his coming acquaint him fully with all, and so leave it entirely with only the poor clothes on my back. But gathering myself up, on further consideration I resolved to make one trial more, and to acquaint Mr. Weston with the unstable condition of things. He has been very discontented with us of late, and has even said that but for his promise he would have nothing more to do with the business; but considering how far we have gone already and how it stood with our credit, he pulled himself together, and coming to me two hours after, he told me he would not yet abandon it. So we decided to hire a ship, and have taken the option of one till Monday. It is small, but except one that was too large for our purpose, we could not get a larger; but it is a fine ship. Since our friends over there are so close-fisted, we hope to secure her without troubling them any further; and if the ship is too small, it is only fitting that those who stumble at straws so early in the day, shall rest them there awhile, lest worse blocks come in the way ere seven years be ended. If you had faced this business so thoroughly a month ago, and had written as you do now, we could have concluded things with less difficulty. But it is as it is. I hope our friends there, if they are quit of the ship-hire, will be induced to venture the more. All that I now require is that salt and nets may be bought there,—all the rest we will provide here; and if even that be impossible, let them give you credit for a month or two, and we will take steps to pay it all. Let Mr. Reynolds remain there, and bring the ship to Southampton. We have hired another pilot here, a Mr. Clark, who went last year to Virginia with a ship of cattle.

You shall hear more exactly by John Turner, who I think will leave here on Tuesday night. I had thought to come with him to answer the complaints; but if I had more mind to go and dispute with them than I have care of this important project, I should be like those who live by clamour and jangling. But neither my mind nor my body is at liberty to do much, for I am fettered with business, and had rather study to be quiet than to make answer to their exceptions. Meanwhile entreat our friends not to be too busy in questioning my actions before they know them. If I do things that I cannot give reasons for, it seems you have sent a fool about your business; in that case you had best return the reproof to yourselves, and send another, and let me return to my combes. The Lord, Who judges justly without respect of persons, see into the equity of my cause and give us quiet, peaceable, and patient minds in all these turmoils, and sanctify us unto all crosses whatsoever. And so I take my leave of you all, in all love and affection.

I hope we shall get all ready here in fourteen days.

Your poor brother,
ROBERT CUSHMAN.

June 11th, 1620.

There arose, also, a difference between the three that received the money and made the provisions in England; for besides the two formerly mentioned, sent from Leyden,—John Carver and Robert Cushman,—there was one chosen in England to join them in making provisions for the voyage. His name was Mr. Martin; he came from Billirike in Essex, whence several others came to join them, as well as from London and other places. It was thought right by those in Holland that these strangers who were to go with them should appoint some one, not so much from any great need of their help, as to avoid all suspicion or jealousy. Indeed their care not to give offence, both in this and other things, afterwards greatly inconvenienced them, as will appear. However, it showed their equal and honest minds. The provisions were made for the most part at Southampton, contrary to Mr. Weston’s and Robert Cushman’s advice (which generally concurred in these things). Reference to these matters is made in the following letter from Robert Cushman to Mr. Carver, and more will appear afterwards.

Robert Cushman in London to John Carver at Southampton:

Loving Friend,

I have received some letters from you, full of affection and complaints; but what it is you want me to do I know not. You cry out, Negligence, negligence, negligence: I marvel why so negligent a man as myself was employed to undertake the business. Yet you know that as far as my power permits, nothing shall be one hour behind, I warrant you. You call upon Mr. Weston to help us with more money than his share in the adventure; while he protests that, but for his promise, he would not have done anything further. He says we take a heady course; and he is offended that our provisions are being made so far off, and that he was not made acquainted with our quantity of things. He says that working thus, in three places, so far distant, we shall, with going hither and thither, wrangling and expostulating, let the summer slip by before we start. And to tell the truth, there is already a flat schism among us. We are readier to dispute than to undertake a voyage. I have received from Leyden, since you went, three or four letters directed to you; though as they only concern me I will not trouble you with them.

I have always feared the event of the Amsterdamers striking in with us. I trow you must excommunicate me, or else go without their company, or we shall not lack quarrelling; but let that pass. We have reckoned, it seems, without our host; and counting upon 150 persons, we cannot raise above £1200 odd, besides some cloth, stockings, and shoes, which are not counted; so we shall come short at least three or four hundred pounds. I would have reduced the beer and other provisions; and now we could get, both in Amsterdam and Kent, beer enough; but we cannot accept it without prejudice.