“I know it is,” said Art, “but, until I find it to be true, I'll take the ginerous side, an' I won't believe it; he's a screw, I know, an' a skinflint, an'—whisht! here he is.”
“Toal Finnigan, how are you?” said Art; “I was goin' to say how is every tether length of you, only that I think it would be impossible to get a tether short enough to measure you.”
“Ha, ha, ha, that's right good—divil a man livin' makes me laugh so much as—why then, Frank Maguire too!—throth, Frank, I'm proud to see you well—an' how are you, man? and—well, in throth I am happy to see you lookin' so well, and in good health; an' whisper, Frank, it's your own fau't that I'm not inquirin' for the wife and childre.”
“An' I can return the compliment, Toal; it's a shame for both of us to be bachelors at this time o' day.”
“Ah,” said the little fellow, “I wasn't Frank Maguire, one of the best lookin' boys in the barony, an' the most respected, an' why not? Well, divil a thing afther all like the ould blood, an' if I wanted a pure dhrop of that same, maybe I don't know where to go to look for it—maybe I don't, I say!”
“It's Toal's fault that he wasn't married many a year ago,” said Art; “he refused more wives, Frank, than e'er a boy of his years from this to Jinglety cooeh—divil a lie in it; sure he'll tell you himself.”
Now, as Toal is to appear occasionally, and to be alluded to from time to time in this narrative, we shall give the reader a short sketch or outline of his physical appearance and moral character. In three words, then, he had all his father's vices multiplied tenfold, and not one of his good qualities, such as they were; his hair was of that nondescript color which partakes at once of the red, the fair, and the auburn; it was a bad dirty dun, but harmonized with his complexion to a miracle. That complexion, indeed, was no common one; as we said, it was one of those which, no matter how frequently it might have been scrubbed, always presented the undeniable evidences of dirt so thorougly ingrained into the pores of the skin, that no process could remove it, short of flaying him alive. His vile, dingy dun bristles stood out in all directions from his head, which was so shaped as to defy admeasurement; the little rascal's body was equally ill-made, and as for his limbs, we have already described them, as reaping-hooks of flesh and blood, terminated by a pair of lark-heeled feet, as flat as smoothing-irons. Now, be it known, that notwithstanding these disadvantages, little Toal looked upon himself as an Adonis upon a small scale, and did certainly believe that scarcely any female on whom he threw his fascinating eye could resist being enamored of him. This, of course, having become generally known, was taken advantage of, and many a merry country girl amused both herself and others at his expenses while he imagined her to be perfectly serious.
“Then how did you escape at all,” said Frank—“you that the girls are so fond of?”
“You may well ax,” said Toal; “but at any rate, it's the divil entirely to have them too fond of you. There's raison in every thing, but wanst a woman takes a strong fancy to the cut of your face, you're done for, until you get rid of her. Throth I suffered as much persecution that way as would make a good batch o' marthyrs. However, what can one do?”
“It's a hard case, Toal,” said Art; “an' I b'lieve you're as badly off, if not worse, now than ever.”