“My dear M'Slime:
“As it is beyond any doubt, that in the fair discharge of our duty, you and I can be mutually serviceable to each other; and as it is equally evident that it is our interest, and what is more, the interest of Lord Cumber, that we should be so, I therefore think it right to observe, that in all transactions between us, each should treat the other with the most perfect confidence. For this reason, I beg to assure you, once for all, that in any proceeding that may appear harsh towards any of his lordship's tenantry, I am and shall be actuated by no other feeling, than a strong, conscientious sense of my duty to him. This is, was, and will bo the principle of my whole life. And you know very well, my dear M'Slime, that if I were less devoted to those interests than I am, my popularity would be greater among the tenantry. Indeed, few men have a right to know this better than yourself, inasmuch as you stand in precisely the same beloved relation to them that I do.
“Our excellent friend Hickman is a very worthy man and exceedingly well meaning. Don't you think so? Oh, I am sure you do. Yet I know not how it happened that he left out of his system of agency some of the most valuable rights and privileges of the landlord. These I will mention to you when I see you, and when I have more time. I consequently must say, that in attempting to revive these rights, even while I was deputy-agent, the unjust odium that is falling upon me already, even while I had scarce time to move in them, ought rather to be—that is morally speaking—visited upon him who allowed them to lapse. Now that the fine old leases of the M'Loughlins and the Harmans, and others, have dropped, what can I do but study Lord Cumber's interest, in the first instance? Not but I would serve them if I could, and will if I can. I bear them no ill-feeling; and if they have joined in the calumnies and threats that are so unjustly uttered against me, what can I do, and what ought I do, but return good for evil? You, as a truly religious and pious man, will feel delighted to support me in this principle, and also to aid me in bearing it practically out. Any services of a similar kind that I can honestly and conscientiously render you—and none other would you accept—I shall be on my part delighted to offer. In the meantime, let me have your excellent advice as to the most efficient means of stifling the unreasonable murmurs that are rising among the people—and as touching M'Loughlin's and Harman's properties, I should be glad to see you, in order to consult upon what may or can be done for them, always compatibly with Lord Cumber's interests.
“The pair of turkies which I send you are the result of my reviving one of his lordship's rights. They are duty-turkies, and I do not think they will eat the worse for the blessings which Darby O'Drive tells me accompanied them; at least I don't find they do.
“All that I have yet written, however, is only preliminary; but now to business. I have received the letter which Lord Cumber transmitted to me, under your frank, in which I am appointed his head agent. He also is willing to accept the two thousand pounds on my own terms—that is, of course, as a loan, at the usual rate of interest. But don't you think, my dear M'Slime, that with respect to this large sum, an understanding might be entered into—or rather an arrangement made, in a quiet way, that would, I flatter myself, turn out of great ultimate advantage to his lordship. The truth is, that Lord Cumber, like most generous men, is very negligent of his own interests—at least much more so than he ought to be; and it would be most beneficial to him, in every sense, to have a person managing his estates, in the best possible condition to serve him. His property, in fact, is not represented in the grand jury panel of the county. This is a great loss to him—a serious loss. In the first place, it is wretchedly, shamefully deficient in roads—both public and private. In the next place, there are many rents left unpaid, through the inability of the people, which we could get paid by the making of these roads, and other county arrangements, which the ill-thinking call jobs. In the third and last place, he has on his property no magistrate friendly to his aforesaid interests, and who would devote himself to them with suitable energy and zeal. Indeed, with regard to the murmurings and heart-burnings alluded to, I fear that such a magistrate will soon become a matter of necessity. There is a bad spirit rising and getting abroad, wherever it came from—and you know, my dear M'Slime, that it could not proceed from either you or me. You know that—you feel it. Now, what I would propose is this—Lord Cumber has sufficient interest with the government, to have me—all-unworthy as I am—appointed a magistrate. Let the government but hint to the chancellor, and the thing is done. In that event, instead of giving him this large sum of money as a loan, let it go as a per contra to my appointment to the bench. And there is another consideration by no means to be overlooked, which is, that by this arrangement the government would be certain to have in the commission a man who would prove himself one of the precise class which they stand in need of—that is, a useful man, devoted to their wishes.
“Now, my dear M'Slime, I mention this to you with all the confidence of unshaken friendship. From you these representations will go to his lordship with a much better grace than they would from me. Tell him in your own peculiar way, that he shall have the two thousand for the magistracy. That is my first object as his friend—this once obtained, I have no doubt of seeing myself, ere long, a member of the grand panel, and capable of serving him still more extensively.
“Believe me to be, “My dear M'Slime, &c, “Valentine M'Clutchy.
“P.S.—I heard you once express a wish about a certain farm—but mum's the word—only this, I have something in my eye for you.”
Solomon M'Slime to the Right Hon. Lord Cumber:—
“My Gracious Lord: