A Counterfeit Presentment; and, The Parlour Car

by William Dean Howells

Mr. R.—"You misinterpret a very inoffensive gesture. I have no idea of touching you, but I hope I may be allowed, as a special favour, to—pick up my hat, which you are in the act of stepping on." Miss Galbraith hastily turns, and strikes the hat with her whirling skirts; it rolls to the other side of the parlour, and Mr. Richards, who goes after it, utters an ironical "Thanks!" He brushes it and puts it on, looking at her where she has again seated herself at the window with her back to him, and continues, "As for any further molestation from me"—

Miss G.—"If you will talk to me"—

Mr. R.—"Excuse me, I am not talking to you."

Miss G.—"What were you doing?"

Mr. R.—"I was beginning to think aloud. I—I was soliloquising. I suppose I may be allowed to soliloquise?"

Miss G., very coldly.—"You can do what you like."

Mr. R.—"Unfortunately that's just what I can't do. If I could do as I liked, I should ask you a single question."

Miss G., after a moment.—"Well, sir, you may ask your question." She remains as before, with her chin in her hand, looking tearfully out of the window; her face is turned from Mr. Richards, who hesitates a moment, before he speaks.

Mr. R.—"I wish to ask you just this, Miss Galbraith: if you couldn't ride backwards in the other car, why do you ride backwards in this?"