“How is the wind, Wise?” asked the captain.
“Some says it’s east, and some says it’s west, Captain Collyer,” was the satisfactory answer.
“And which way do you say it is?” inquired his master.
“Whichever way you please, sir,” replied the steward, pulling a lock of his hair.
Even the presence of our captain could scarcely prevent us youngsters from bursting into a roar of laughter. This was surpassed, however, by an Irish midshipman, an old shipmate of mine, who, when undergoing his examination for navigation, being asked, whether the sun went round the earth, or the earth round the sun, looked up with perfect confidence, and unhesitatingly replied—
“Faith, gentlemen, it’s sometimes one and sometimes the other.”
He was very much surprised at being turned back. He, however, afterwards managed to pass, but whether it was because the examining officers were not quite confident as to the exact state of the case themselves, and therefore did not push the question, or that he had in the meantime gained the required information, I do not now remember.
Captain Collyer was accustomed to Billy’s eccentricities. They were sometimes inconvenient. One day, we fell in with a line-of-battle ship, and our captain had to go on board to pay his respects to his superior officer.
As he was hurriedly leaving his cabin he called for his cocked hat.
“Your hat. Captain Collyer—your hat, sir,” ejaculated Billy Wise, in a state of great trepidation,—“it’s all safe, sir. It druve ashore at Hurst, as we was coming through the Needles Passage, and some of the sodgers at the castle picked it up.”