“If life could be—what it would mean to give him a child, but life in its entirety cannot be—for me. Probably that is the creed of many women.”[[21]]
It is unnecessary to particularize as to the place of response in art. The love and sex themes are based on response, and they outweigh the other themes altogether. Religion appeals to fear, fear of death and extinction, and promises everlasting security, or threatens everlasting pain, but in the New Testament the element of response, connected with the concrete personalities of Jesus and Mary, predominates. Any hymn book will contain many versified love letters addressed to Jesus. There are on record, also many alleged conversations of nuns with Jesus which are indistinguishable in form from those of human courtship.
19. Angela da Foligno says that Christ told her he loved her better than any woman in the vale of Spoleto. The words of this passage are fatuous almost beyond belief: “Then He began to say to me the words that follow, to provoke me to love Him: ‘O my sweet daughter! O my daughter, my temple! O my daughter, my delight! Love me, because thou art much loved by me.’ And often did He say to me: ‘O my daughter, My sweet Spouse!’ And he added in an underbreath, ‘I love thee more than any other woman in the valley of Spoleto.’” To amuse and to delight Gertrude of Eisleben, He sang duets with her “in a tender and harmonious voice.” The same saint writes of their “incredible intimacy”; and here, as in later passages of Angela da Foligno, the reader is revolted by their sensuality.... In the diary of Marie de l’Incarnation there is such an entry as “entretien familier avec J.-C.”; and during such interviews she makes use of a sort of pious baby talk, like a saintly Tillie Slowboy.[[22]]
In general the desire for response is the most social of the wishes. It contains both a sexual and a gregarious element. It makes selfish claims, but on the other hand it is the main source of altruism. The devotion to child and family and devotion to causes, principles, and ideals may be the same attitude in different fields of application. It is true that devotion and self-sacrifice may originate from any of the other wishes also—desire for new experience, recognition, or security—or may be connected with all of them at once. Pasteur’s devotion to science seems to be mainly the desire for new experience,—scientific curiosity; the campaigns of a Napoleon represent recognition (ambition) and the self-sacrifice of such characters as Maria Spiridonova, Florence Nightingale, Jane Addams is a sublimation of response. The women who demanded Juvenile Courts were stirred by the same feeling as the mother in document No. 11, whereas the usual legal procedure is based on the wish to have security for life and property.
4. The Desire for Recognition. This wish is expressed in the general struggle of men for position in their social group, in devices for securing a recognized, enviable, and advantageous social status. Among girls’ dress is now perhaps the favorite means of securing distinction and showing class. A Bohemian immigrant girl expressed her philosophy in a word: “After all, life is mostly what you wear.” Veblen’s volume, “Theory of the Leisure Class”, points out that the status of men is established partly through the show of wealth made by their wives. Distinction is sought also in connection with skillful and hazardous activities, as in sports, war, and exploration. Playwriters and sculptors consciously strive for public favor and “fame.” In the “achievement” of Pasteur (case 6) and of similar scientific work there is not only the pleasure of the “pursuit” itself, but the pleasure of public recognition. Boasting, bullying, cruelty, tyranny, “the will to power” have in them a sadistic element allied to the emotion of anger and are efforts to compel a recognition of the personality. The frailty of women, their illness, and even feigned illness, is often used as a power-device, as well as a device to provoke response. On the other hand, humility, self-sacrifice, saintliness, and martyrdom may lead to distinction. The showy motives connected with the appeal for recognition we define as “vanity”; the creative activities we call “ambition.”
The importance of recognition and status for the individual and for society is very great. The individual not only wants them but he needs them for the development of his personality. The lack of them and the fear of never obtaining them are probably the main source of those psychopathic disturbances which the Freudians treat as sexual in origin.
On the other hand society alone is able to confer status on the individual and in seeking to obtain it he makes himself responsible to society and is forced to regulate the expression of his wishes. His dependence on public opinion is perhaps the strongest factor impelling him to conform to the highest demands which society makes upon him.
20. The chief difference between the down-and-out man and the down-and-out girl is this. The d.-a.-o. man sleeps on a park bench and looks like a bum. The d.-a.-o. girl sleeps in an unpaid-for furnished room and looks very respectable. The man spends what little change he has—if he has any—for food and sleeps on a bench. The girl spends what little change she has—if she has any—for a room and goes without food.
Not because she has more pride than the man has. She hasn’t. But because cops haul in girls who would sleep on benches, and well-meaning organizations “rescue” girls who look down and out. A pretty face and worn-out soles are a signal for those who would save girls from the perilous path, whereas an anæmic face in a stylish coat and a pair of polished French heels can go far unmolested....
You will argue that any woman with an empty stomach and a fur coat ought to sell the coat for a shabby one and spend the money for food. That is because you have never been a lady bum. A fur coat gets her places that a full stomach never would. It is her entrée into hotel washrooms when she is dirty from job hunting. It gets her into department-store rest rooms when she is sore of foot. And in the last stages it gets her help from a certain class of people who would be glad to help her if she had suddenly lost her purse, but who never would if she had never had a purse.