“Madam, conscious as we are of our own infirmities.” But immediate objection was taken by their lordships to this opening, and suggestions were invited. The measured calculated drawl of Bowen made itself heard:
“Suppose we substitute for the paragraph this: ‘Conscious as we are of one another’s infirmities!’”
Mr. Commissioner Kerr was a Judge whose rasping voice and strong Glasgow accent issued from the bench of my time utterances both strange and strong. The old gentleman was, in effect, brutally rude, and that’s a fact. He was particularly hard on solicitors. On one occasion I heard him open a charge in this way:
“There are a number of hairpies who infest this coort. An’ when I use the words ‘hairpies,’ I do not wish to be meesunderstood. I refer to the soleecitors who lie in wait about the corridors of the coort.”
I was present also when the following colloquy took place between the bench and a perfectly respectable witness to whom Kerr had evidently taken an instinctive dislike:
Kerr: “What air you?”
Witness: “I’m a merchant.”
Kerr: “What’s your mairchandise?”
Witness: “I’m an importer of lemons.”
Kerr: “An importher of lemons! Why, ye ken you’re naething mair nor less than a huckster!”