The Comic is not, strictly speaking, a Weather Almanack. Still the heat of last summer made us so uncomfortable (we do not mean merely in a physical sense), that we thought it our duty to inquire into the matter. We have, therefore, condescended on this occasion to look into futurity with a weather eye, of which we hasten to present the reader with a few "shoots,"—such, we believe, being the term usually applied to the natural emanations from the eyes of a Murphy.
We regret to say our worst fears have been confirmed. The page in the Book of Destiny that has been opened to our inspection is closely printed, and presents the aspect of a number of the Times, dated August 2nd, 1980. We leave our readers to form their own opinions on the following extracts:—
The Weather and the Crops.—The season continues to be unusually backward. The plantains in the neighbourhood of Wolverhampton have scarcely passed the flower. The cotton fields, however, of the West Riding are in a healthy condition—several trees being already in pod. It is feared that there will be a great loss in consequence of the dearth of labourers. It is true that immigration from Iceland, Nova Zembla, and the manufacturing countries generally, continues to a great extent; but nothing can atone for the impossibility of arousing the native slave population to exertion. The prospects of sugar are far from satisfactory, the siroccos of the last month having completely devastated the plantations—the canes on Clapham Common present a disastrous spectacle! The bread-fruit trees on Blackheath promise an abundant supply of half-quarterns.
"Taking care of Number One"—or—
A Gentleman endeavouring to keep "Number One"—out of "St. Paul's Church Yard"
Frightful Accident.—On Wednesday last, Mr. Edward Jackson, landlord of the "Cocoa-Nut," Tottenham Court Road, having had the imprudence to bathe in the Serpentine, was attacked by a ferocious alligator, who devoured both his legs so as to make amputation, we regret to say, unnecessary.
Enormous Palm Cabbage.—A gigantic specimen of this national plant grown in the open air by a native slave named Higgins, in the little garden attached to his shanty, was exhibited on Tuesday at the meeting of the Agricultural Society. It measured six feet in circumference, and weighed twenty-three pounds four ounces. A medal was awarded to the grower, and was accepted by the Rajah Simpson, his owner, whose family subsequently dined off the cabbage, expressing themselves highly gratified.
Sporting Intelligence.—His Majesty's elephants threw off yesterday from Richmond Park at four o'clock in the morning (the absurd old-world custom of sporting and transacting business in the heat of the day having, we are happy to say, exploded among the intelligent classes); a fine tiger was scented in the jungles of Slave Common, and soon broke cover. The run was a short one. "Puss" was brought to bay among the bamboos of Isleworth swamp, and speared by Coolies Walker and Smithers (eating, by the way, a considerable portion of the latter). His Majesty was in at the death, and returned to tiffin at 8 A.M.
Health of the Metropolis.—The deaths in the metropolis during the last week, as certified by the Registrar-General, are as follows:—
| Yellow Fever | 1640 |
| Black do | 870 |
| Green do | 651 |
| Ague | 923 |
| Coup de Soleil | 130 |
| Eaten by personal acquaintances (cannibalism being, we regret to say, rather on the increase among the benighted lower orders) | 24 |
| Eaten by savage animals, stung by reptiles (including a family of six in Judd Street, devoured by the house tiger, who had broken his chain, and was unfortunately not muzzled), &c. | 18 |
| Influenza (old English complaint) almost obsolete | 1 |
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| Total | 4257 |
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