Abashed by the failure of his first pun, for he was impudent and easily disconcerted, Wagg kept his conversation pretty much to Pen during the rest of dinner, and of course chiefly spoke about their neighbours. “This is one of Bungay’s grand field-days,” he said. “We are all Bungavians here.—Did you read Popjoy’s novel? It was an old magazine story written by poor Buzzard years ago, and forgotten here until Mr. Trotter (that is Trotter with the large shirt collar) fished it out and bethought him that it was applicable to the late elopement; so Bob wrote a few chapters a propos—Popjoy permitted the use of his name, and I dare say supplied a page here and there—and ‘Desperation, or the Fugitive Duchess’ made its appearance. The great fun is to examine Popjoy about his own work, of which he doesn’t know a word.—I say, Popjoy, what a capital passage that is in Volume Three,—where the Cardinal in disguise, after being converted by the Bishop of London, proposes marriage to the Duchess’s daughter.”
“Glad you like it,” Popjoy answered; “it’s a favourite bit of my own.”
“There’s no such thing in the whole book,” whispered Wagg to Pen. “Invented it myself. Gad! it wouldn’t be a bad plot for a high-church novel.”
“I remember poor Byron, Hobhouse, Trelawney, and myself, dining with Cardinal Mezzocaldo at Rome,” Captain Sumph began, “and we had some Orvieto wine for dinner, which Byron liked very much. And I remember how the Cardinal regretted that he was a single man. We went to Civita Vecchia two days afterwards, where Byron’s yacht was—and, by Jove, the Cardinal died within three weeks; and Byron was very sorry, for he rather liked him.”
“A devilish interesting story, Sumph, indeed,” Wagg said.
“You should publish some of those stories, Captain Sumph, you really should. Such a volume would make our friend Bungay’s fortune,” Shandon said.
“Why don’t you ask Sumph to publish ’em in your new paper—the what-d’ye-call-’em—hay, Shandon?” bawled out Wagg.
“Why don’t you ask him to publish ’em in your old magazine, the Thingumbob?” Shandon replied.
“Is there going to be a new paper?” asked Wenham, who knew perfectly well, but was ashamed of his connection with the press.
“Bungay going to bring out a paper?” cried Popjoy, who, on the contrary, was proud of his literary reputation and acquaintances. “You must employ me. Mrs. Bungay, use your influence with him, and make him employ me. Prose or verse—what shall it be? Novels, poems, travels, or leading articles, begad. Anything or everything—only let Bungay pay me, and I’m ready—I am now my dear Mrs. Bungay, begad now.”