Val. Well, you’ll still be too forward.
Speed. And yet I was last chidden for being too slow.
Val. Go to, sir: tell me, do you know Madam Silvia?
Speed. She that your worship loves?
15 Val. Why, how know you that I am in love?
Speed. Marry, by these special marks: first, you have learned, like Sir Proteus, to wreathe your arms, like a malecontent; to relish a love-song, like a robin-redbreast; to walk alone, like one that [had] the pestilence; to sigh, like a 20 school-boy that had lost his A B C; to weep, like a young wench that had [buried] her grandam; to fast, like one that takes diet; to watch, like one that fears robbing; to speak puling, like a beggar at Hallowmas. You were wont, when you laughed, to crow like a cock; when you walked, to walk II. 1.
25 like one of the lions; when you fasted, it was presently after dinner; when you looked sadly, it was for want of money: and now [you are] metamorphosed with a mistress, that, when I look on you, I can hardly think you my master.
Val. Are all these things perceived in me?
30 Speed. They are all perceived without ye.
Val. Without me? they cannot.
Speed. [Without you?] nay, that’s certain, for, without you were so simple, none else [would]: but you are so without these follies, that these follies are within you, and shine 35 through you like the water in an urinal, that not an eye that sees you but is a physician to comment on your malady.