And then I pause, and turn aside
From pleasure’s throng of pangless-hearted,
To weep! No. Sentiment and pride
Are by each other always thwarted!
I press my hand upon my brow,
To still the throbbing pulse that heaves it,
Recall my boyhood’s faltered vow,
And marvel—if she still believes it.
But she is woman—and her heart,
Like her tiara’s brightest jewel,
Cold—hard—till kindled by some art,
Then quenchless burns—itself its fuel—
So poets say. Well, let it pass,
And those who list may yield it credit;
But as for constancy, alas!
I’ve never known—I’ve only read it.
Love! ’tis a roving fire, at most
The cuerpo santa of life’s ocean;
Now flashing through the storm, now lost—
Who trust, ’tis said, rue their devotion.
It may be, ’tis a mooted creed—
I have my doubts, and it—believers,
Though one is faithless—where’s the need
Of shunning all—as gay deceivers?
I said I loved. I did. But ours
Was felt, not growled hyæna fashion!
We wandered not at midnight hours,
Some dignity restrained the passion!
We loved—I never stooped to woo;
We met—I always doffed my beaver;
She smiled a careless “How d’ye do—
Good morning, sir,”—I rose to leave her.
She loved—she never told me so;
I never asked—I could not doubt it;
For there were signs on cheek and brow;
And asking! Love is known without it!
’Twas understood—we were content,
And rode, and sang, and waltzed together!
Alone, without embarrassment
We talked of something—not the weather!
Time rolled along—the parting hour
With arrowy speed brought its distresses,
A kiss—a miniature—a flower—
A ringlet from those raven tresses;
And the tears that would unbidden start,
(An hour, perhaps, and they had perished,)
In the far chambers of my heart,
I swore her image should be cherished.
I’ve looked on peril—it has glared
In fashionable forms upon me,
From levelled aim—from weapon bared—
And doctors three attending on me!
But never did my sternness wane
At pang by shot or steel imparted;
I’d not recall that hour of pain
For years of bliss—it passed—we parted.
We parted—though her tear-gemmed cheeks,
Her heaving breast had thus unmanned me—
She quite forgot me in three weeks!
And other beauties soon trepanned me.
We met—and did not find it hard
Joy’s overwhelming tide to smother—
There was a “Mrs.” on her card,
And I—was married to another.
SONG.[9]
LORD ROLAND.
Lord Roland rose, and went to mass,
And doffed his mourning weed!
And bade them bring a looking-glass,
And saddle fast a steed;
“I’ll deck with gems my bonnet’s loop,
And wear a feather fine,
And when lorn lovers sit and droop
Why, I will sit and dine!
Sing merrily, sing merrily,
And fill the cup of wine!