“Yes, poor wretch. He is a fine fellow, and would have made her happy if it hadn’t been for me. So you understand, of course, how much he hates me, don’t you?”
“Of course, it is only natural.” Her voice was warm with pity.
Alexis glanced up at her with pathetic gratitude. “He met me at the door. He gave me one terrible look, a look that I shall never forget, and said, ‘Your wife is dead.’ I—I don’t know exactly what I did, but I think I leaned against the wall and I must have looked odd, for he cried out, ‘Christ, this is no time to faint, man. Your wife is dead, I tell you, and you’ve got to face it. It’s your own neglect that has killed her!’ Those are the very words he used. They are branded into my brain.”
He stopped short with a moan. Anne uttered a cry of pity.
“Poor boy, how you have suffered! But go on, I must know it all. That is the only way I can help you.”
Dark with pain and compassion, her eyes endowed him with renewed force.
“He told me horrors, Anne, but I deserved them all. He said there was no reason why it should not have been a normal birth, except that Claire had been so weakened by unhappiness that she simply didn’t have the physical stamina to pull her through. And he added that she didn’t want to live, that she felt all along that she wouldn’t. That’s why she refused to go to the hospital. She couldn’t bear the thought of dying there. Anne, think of it. Think of poor Claire, knowing she was going to die, and planning for it like that. Isn’t it too pitiful?”
“Yes, it is horrible,” Anne whispered, “and that is probably what killed her. She was so sure she was going to die, that she made no effort to help herself.”
“That is what Elliott said. There wasn’t much he didn’t say. When he had finished, he swept by me and out of the house and I haven’t seen him since, excepting——” he hesitated painfully, “at the funeral.”
Anne winced. The funeral, how heartrending! She had never thought of that, somehow. But of course there had had to be one. She avoided his eyes that brimmed with knowledge of such horrors.