CLERK Jemima Flap-Cakes, charged with illegal possession and sale of alcoholic liquors.
JUDGE (She is a fat, black, belligerent looking woman. JUDGE looks coldly at her.) Well, you heard whut he said. Is you guilty or unguilty? And I'm tellin' you right now dat you come up befo' me it's just like youse in church. You better have a strong determination, and you better tell a good experience.
JEMIMA
(Arms akimbo)
Yes, I sold it and I'll sell it again.
(snaps fingers and shakes hips)
How does ole booze-selling mama talk?
JUDGE
Yes, five thousand dollars and ten years in jail.
(Snaps fingers and shakes hips)
How does ole heavy fining papa talk?
(She is led away, shouting and
weeping)
CLERK
De Otis Blunt, charged wid stealin' a mule.
(LAWYER arises and comes forward with
the prisoner)
LAWYER
You can't convict this man. I'm here to represent him.
JUDGE
Yo' mouf might spout lak a coffee pot but I got a lawyer
(Looks at other lawyer)
dat kin beat your segastuatin'.
(Looks admiring at girl)
How am I chewin' my dictionary and minglin' my alphabets?
LAWYER
Well, I kin try, can't I?
JUDGE
Oh yeah, you kin try, but I kin see right now where he's gointer git all
de time dat God ever made dat ain't been used already. From now on.
(To LAWYER)
Go 'head, and spread yo' lungs all over Georgy, but he's goin' to jail!
Mules must be respected.
LAWYER
(Striking a pose at the bar)
Your Honor,
(Looks at the pretty girl)
Ladies and Gentlemen—