A Gentleman wanted two resolute Ruffians, to do some Exploit on one that had abused him, his Man brings him two whose Faces were slash’d and Cut: No, says he, I’ll have none of you: but if you can bring me them, who gave you those Wounds, they are for my turn.
106
Un Gentilhomme ayant affaire de deux Coupe-jarrets determinez pour faire piece à un homme qui lui avoit fait affront, son valet lui en amena deux, qui avoient le visage balafré: Non, dit-il, je ne veux point de vous; Mais si vous pouvez m’amener ceux qui vous ont fait ces Balafres, ils feront mon affaire.
107
Two Friends, who had not seen one another a great while, meeting by chance, one ask’d the other how he did? he said he was not very well, and was Married since he saw him. That is good news indeed, says he; Nay, not so much good news, neither, replies the other, for I have married a Shrew; that is bad, said the other; not so bad neither, said he; for I had two Thousand Pounds with her; that’s well again, said the other; not so well neither, for I laid it out in Sheep, and they died of the Rot; that was hard indeed, says his Friend; not so hard neither, says he, for I sold the Skins for more Money than the Sheep cost; that made you amends, says the other; not so much amends neither, said he, for I laid out my Money in a House, and it was burn’d: That was a great Loss indeed; Nay, not so great a Loss neither, for my Wife was Burnt in it.
107
Deux Amis qui ne s’ètoient pas veus depuis long tems, se rencontrant par hazard, l’un d’eux demanda à l’autre comment il se portoit? il lui dît pas trop bien, & qu’il s’ètoit marié depuis qu’il ne l’avoit veu: voilà une bonne nouvelle, dit-il; Pas trop bonne, lui repliqua l’autre, car j’ai épousé une querelleuse; Voila qui va mal, lui dit l’autre; pas tant mal non plus, dit il, car elle m’a apporté deux mille livres Sterlin; voilà qui est encore bien, lui dit l’autre; Pas trop bien non plus, car j’en ai acheté des Moutons, & ils sont tous morts du Tac: Voilà qui est cruel, lui dit son ami; Pas tant cruel, dit il, car j’ai vendu les peaux plus que les Moutons ne me coutoient; Cela vous a dedommagé, lui dit l’autre; Pas beaucoup, car j’en ai acheté une Maison qui s’est brulée; Voilà en verité une grande perte; Pas trop grande, car ma Femme s’y est brulée aussi.
108
One told his Wife, that he heard for certain, that they were all to be counted Cuckolds in their Town, but one man: Who doest thou think that should be? says he, Faith, says she, Husband, I cannot think who it is for my Life.
108