It is small wonder that the perusal of that hitherto, in my eyes, immaculate magazine, the Nineteenth Century, affords me less pleasure than usual. There may possibly be some articles in it both worth reading and worth remembering, but of these I am no longer conscious, for an overmastering rage fills my soul, to the exclusion of everything else.

One article stands out with such prominence beyond the rest that, to all intents and purposes, this number of the Nineteenth Century contains nothing else for me. Not that there is anything admirable in the said article. Far from it. I look upon it as the most despicable piece of treachery ever perpetrated towards woman by women.

Indeed, were it not that some of the perpetrators of this outrage on my sex are well-known writers and society leaders, I would doubt the authenticity of the signatures, and comfort my soul with the belief that the whole affair has been nothing but a hoax got up by timorous and jealous male bipeds, already living in fear of the revolution in social life which looms before us at no distant date.

As it is, I am able to avail myself of no such doubtful solace, and I can only feel mad, downright mad—no other word is strong enough—because I am not near enough to these traitors to their own sex to give them a viva voce specimen of my opinion of them, though I resolve mentally that they shall taste of my vengeance in the near future, if I can only devise some sure method of bringing this about.

But perhaps by this time some of my readers, who may not have seen or heard of the objectionable article in question, may be anxious to know what this tirade is all about.

I will tell them.

But I must first allude to the fact that my sex really consists of three great divisions. To the first, but not necessarily the superior division, belongs the class which prefers to be known as ladies.

Ladies, or rather the class to which they belong, are generally found to rest their claim to this distinction, if it be one, upon the fact that they are the wives or daughters of prominent or well-to-do members of the other sex.

They find themselves in comfortable circumstances. The money or distinction which may be at the command of their husbands or fathers enables them to pass the greater portion of their time in dressing, or in airing such charms as they may possess. They lead for the most part a frivolous life, and their greatest glory is the reflected lustre which shines upon them by virtue of the wealth or attainments of their husbands or other male connections.

It is always noticeable that the less brains and claim for distinction a lady possesses herself, and the less actual cause she has for self-glorification, the higher and the more arrogantly does she hold her head above her fellows, and the more prone is she to despise and depreciate every woman who recognises a nobler aim in life than that of populating the world with offspring as imbecile as herself.

Il va sans dire that there are thousands of ladies to whom the last remark is scarcely applicable. Gentle in manners, and yielding in disposition, they are perfectly satisfied with the existing order of things, and quite believe the doctrine that man in his arrogance has laid down, that he is the God-ordained lord of creation, and that implicit obedience to his whims and fancies is the first duty of woman.

They have all they feel necessary to their well being. They have husbands who regard them as so much personal property, and who treat them alternately as pets or slaves; their wants are liberally provided for without any anxiety on their part; they rather like the idea of having little or no work to do, and to their mind, independence is a dreadful bugbear, which every lady ought to shun as she would shun a mad dog or a leper.

They are not to blame, poor things, for they are what man and circumstances have made them, and their general amiability and vague notions of doing what they have been taught is right, at all costs, partly exonerates such of them as have been persuaded to sign the Nineteenth Century protest.

Although I am not disposed to regard ladies as the wisest and most immaculate members of my sex, I do not include in this category all those who would fain usurp the doubtful distinction of being regarded as such. For instance: a young friend of mine, on her marriage, found herself domiciled in a very pretty little house in the suburbs, her domestic staff being limited to one maid-of-all-work.

One day, while the latter was out upon an errand, a tremendous ring at the front-door bell put my friend all in a flutter. She had but recently returned from her honeymoon, and wished to receive callers with becoming dignity. She would have preferred the maid to open the door, and show the visitor into her tiny drawing room; but as the maid was not at home, there was nothing for it but to officiate as door-opener herself.

She need not have been alarmed, for the individual at the door proved to be a big, fat, dirty, perspiring female, with a large basket of crockery-ware, some of which she tried to persuade my friend to buy. Finding her efforts in this direction fruitless, she began to wonder if she had been forestalled, and somewhat surprised my little friend by the following query: “If ye plaze, mum, can ye tell me if there’s been another lady hawking pots about here this afternoon?”

No; decidedly this individual’s claim to be regarded as a lady was somewhat too pretentious, and it must be understood that when speaking of ladies, I draw the line at hawkers.

The second great division of the female sex is composed of women. These do not sigh for society cognomens such as are essential to the happiness of their less thoughtful sisters. They want something more substantial. Many of them find it necessary to earn their own livelihood. Others possess a sufficient percentage of this world’s good things to enable them to banish all dread of poverty in their own lives. Others, and I am glad to say that this class is ever on the increase, prefer to work, simply because they prize independence above all things.

No one will venture to suggest that these women are selfish egotists, for their aims and ambitions embrace the welfare of half the human race at least, and, whatever may be the ultimate results of their gallant fight on behalf of “Woman’s Rights,” they will be only too thankful to see them enjoyed by every other woman on the face of the earth.

Widely different from these is the third division of the feminine genus homo. Slaves they are. Neither more nor less. When emancipation comes to them, it will not be as a result of their own endeavours, for custom, perverted education, physical weakness, and lack of energy all combine to keep them in the groove into which they have been mercilessly trodden for centuries.

Fortunately some of them go through life without feeling terribly discontented. Their wily subjugators, led by the priesthood, have for centuries played upon feminine superstition and credulity, until they have succeeded in making them believe that their physical weakness, with its natural concomitant evil, intellectual inferiority, is foreordained by an omniscient Being whom they are expected to gratefully adore because of His great justice and mercy.

Now and again some of these slaves rebel, and are punished for breaking laws made by men for the benefit of men. Sometimes we hear of some woman who, driven either by lack of education, or by circumstances, has committed some outrage upon society which calls for terrible punishment. Perhaps she has been unfaithful to a wicked incarnation of lust and cruelty, who has for years indulged in liaisons of which all the world has been cognisant. She has had to put up with incredible slights and indignities, but as her husband has been cunning enough to refrain from beating and starving her, the law, as made and administered by men, allows her no escape from her irksome marital bonds.

But let her become reckless, and find solace in another man’s love, then she becomes a social pariah, against whom our canting hypocritical Pharisees hold up their hands in denunciatory horror, and from whom the husband speedily obtains a judicial separation, applauded by sympathising male humbugs, and consoled by the “damages,” valued at £5,000 or so, which the court has ordered the co-respondent to pay as a solatium for his wounded affections. Said co-respondent will not be improved in morals by the skinning process he has undergone, but will turn his attentions in future to ladies who have no husbands to claim golden solatium for lacerated feelings.

Corrupt, Degraded, Rotten to the core is British Civilisation, and yet we find women, who ought to know better, actually pretending that they are perfectly contented with the existing order of things.

And that brings me back to the raison d’être of this story. The Nineteenth Century Magazine has been guilty of condoning, if not of instigating, an atrocity. It has published a rigmarole, signed by a great many ladies, to the effect that Woman’s Suffrage is not wanted by women, and, indeed, would hardly be accepted if it were offered to them. The principal signatories are in comfortable circumstances; have no great cares upon their shoulders; they plume themselves upon occupying prominent positions in society; it is to their interest to uphold the political principles of the men whose privilege it is to support them; they do not see that life need be made any brighter for them, therefore they conspire to prevent every other woman from emerging from the ditch in which she grovels.

Of course the other woman may be ambitious, or industrious, or miserable, or oppressed; but that has nothing to do with the fine ladies, whose arguments are as feeble as their hearts are callous, and whose principles are as unjustifiable as their selfishness is reprehensible.

“We have all we want,” say these fair philanthropists, “and we intend to use our best endeavours to make other women regard their circumstances in the same light. They must be taught to duly acknowledge the reverence they owe to MAN and God. If we cannot persuade them that things are as they ought to be, we will take effectual means to prevent their further progress towards the emancipation some of them are treasonably preaching. Their morals we will leave to the priesthood to coddle and terrorise, but we must make them understand that MAN always was, always must, and always will be, of paramount power and wisdom in this world. Woman was but made from the rib of a man, and ought to know from this fact alone that she can never be his equal,” and so on ad nauseum.

It would be wonderful if I, being a woman, did not feel indignant when being confronted with these and similar crushing arguments, which, if not all aired in the Nineteenth Century, are quite as strong as any which the deluded signatories have to advance in support of the despicably unwomanly attitude they have adopted.

Only a rib, forsooth! How do they know that woman was made out of nothing better than a man’s rib? We have only a man’s word for that, and I have proved the falsity of so many manly utterances that I would like some scientific proof as to the truth or falsity of the spare-rib argument before I give it implicit credence.

Thank goodness, the Fortnightly Review comes to the rescue with a gallant counter-protest, signed by the cream of British WOMANHOOD, and I feel viciously glad that I have been privileged to add my name to the long list of those who are determined to stand up for justice to their sex, whether they may happen to feel the need of it in their own individual cases or not. I am also delighted to find an influential magazine, conducted by men, which chivalrously does battle on behalf of my sex.

“Good old Fortnightly,” I apostrophise mentally. “Long life and prosperity be thine,” and I am confidently able to predict that there will be a persistent and flourishing Fortnightly Review of all things British long after the Nineteenth Century has become a thing of the past.

But here my attention is directed to the fact that two women, who have always womanfully championed the cause of their sex, have written replies to the anti-woman suffrage article, and that, furthermore, the editor of the Nineteenth Century has inserted these replies in his review, which forthwith is absolved from a great share of the displeasure which the “atrocity” roused, not alone in my breast, but in thousands of other women—and MEN.

The last fact is justly emphasised in big letters, for it shows that at least some portion of the male sex recognises the enormity and injustice of saddling one-half of the human race with all the disabilities it is possible to heap upon it, except the disabilities of exemption from taxation and kindred methods of assisting in promoting the general welfare of the nation.

When I mention the fact that the two replies in the Nineteenth are written by Mrs. Fawcett and Mrs. Ashton Dilke respectively, I have, I think, given sufficient assurance that the replies are in themselves able ones.

Into such a good humour, in fact, have I been soothed by the perusal of the counter-protests, that I find myself stringing together all sorts of fancies in which women’s achievements form conspicuous features, and I am just noticing how pleasant Mrs. Weldon looks in the Speaker’s chair, listening to Mrs. Besant’s first Prime Ministerial speech, when my senses become entirely “obfuscated,” as Sambo would say, and I sink into slumber as profound as that which overcame the fabled enchanted guardians of my favourite enchanted palace.

CHAPTER I.

The next event I can chronicle was opening my eyes on a scene at once so beautiful and strange that I started to my feet in amaze. This was not my study, and I beheld nothing of the magazine which was the last thing I remembered seeing before I went to sleep. I was in a glorious garden, gay with brilliant hued flowers, the fragrance of which filled the air with a subtle and delicate perfume; around me were trees laden with luscious fruits which I can only compare to apples, pears, and quinces, only they were as much finer than the fruits I had hitherto been familiar with as Ribstone pippins are to crabs, and as jargonelles are to greenbacks. Countless birds were singing overhead, and I was about to sink down again, and yield to a delicious languor which overpowered me, when I was recalled to the necessity of behaving more decorously by hearing someone near me exclaim in mystified accents, “By Jove! But isn’t this extraordinary? I say, do you live here, or have you been taking hasheesh too?”

I looked up, and saw, perched on the limb of a great tree, a young man of about thirty years of age, who looked so ridiculously mystified at the elevated position in which he found himself, that I could not refrain from smiling, though I did not feel able to give an immediate satisfactory reply to his queries.

“Oh, that’s right,” he commented. “It makes a fellow relieved to see a smile, when he wasn’t at all sure whether he wouldn’t get sent to Jericho for perching up an apple tree. But really, I don’t know how the deuce I came to be up here, that is, I beg your pardon, but I can’t understand how I happen to be up this apple tree. And oh! by Jove! It isn’t an apple tree, after all! Isn’t it extraordinary?”

But I could positively do nothing but laugh at him for the space of a moment or two. Then I gravely remarked that as I supposed he was not glued to the tree, he had better come down, whereat he followed my advice, being unfortunate enough, however, to graze his hands, and tear the knees of his trousers during the process of disembarkation.

When at last he had relieved himself of a few spare expletives, delivered in a tone which he vainly flattered himself was too low for me to hear, he stood revealed before me, a perfect specimen of the British masher. His height was not too great, being, I subsequently ascertained five feet three, an inch less than my own, but he made the most of what there was of him by holding himself as erect as possible, and as he wore soles an inch thick to his otherwise smart boots, he looked rather taller than he really was.

His proportions were not at all bad, and I have seen a good many very much worse looking fellows who flattered themselves that they were quite killing. His face had lost the freshness of early youth, and looked as though it spent a great deal of its time in the haunts of dissipation. The moustache, however, was perfect—so golden, so long, so elegant was it, that it must have been the envy of countless members of the masher tribe, and I was not surprised to notice presently that its owner found his pet occupation in stroking it.

Just now, however, he was chiefly employed in lamenting the accident which had occurred to his nether garment, this being, by the way, one portion of a tweed suit of the most alarmingly demonstrative pattern and colour.

“By Jove!” he muttered, disconsolately, “it’s awful! you know. When I was so careful, too! What on earth ever possessed me to mount that tree? Isn’t it extraordinary?”

This time I was about to attempt a reply, when I was struck dumb with awe and astonishment, and my companion, who had found his own eyes sufficiently powerful to take in my appearance, hastily fixed a single eyeglass into position, and gazed in open-mouthed wonder at an apparition which approached us.

And he might well gaze, for of a surety the creature which we saw was something worth looking at, and a specimen of a race the like of which we had never seen before. “It is a woman,” I thought. “A goddess!” the masher declared, and for a time I could not feel sure that he was mistaken.

She was close upon seven feet in height, I am sure, and was of magnificent build. A magnified Venus, a glorified Hebe, a smiling Juno, were here all united in one perfect human being whose gait was the very poetry of motion.

She wore a very peculiar dress, I thought, until I saw that science and common sense had united in forming a costume in which the requirements alike of health, comfort, and beauty had reached their acmé.

A modification of the divided skirt came a little below the knee, the stockings and laced boots serving to heighten, instead of to hide, their owner’s beautiful symmetry of limb. A short skirt supplemented the graceful tunic, which was worn slightly open at the neck, and partially revealed the dainty whiteness of a shapely bust. The whole costume was of black velvet, and was set off by exquisite filmy laces, and by a crimson sash which confined the tunic at the waist, and hung gracefully on the left side of the wearer.

She was wearing a silver-embroidered velvet cap, which she courteously doffed on beholding us, and I noticed that her hair, but an inch or two long, curled about her head and temples in the most delightfully picturesque fashion imaginable.

She was surprised to see us, that was quite apparent, but she evidently mistook our identity for awhile. “What strange children!” she exclaimed, in a rich, sonorous voice, which was bewitchingly musical. “Why are you here, and for what particular purpose are you masquerading in this extraordinary fashion?”

“Yes, it is extraordinary, isn’t it?” burst forth the masher, “but you are slightly mistaken about us. I can’t answer for this lady, and I really don’t know what the deuce she is doing here, but I am the Honourable Augustus Fitz-Musicus. I daresay you have heard of me. My ancestor, you know, was King George the Fourth. He fell in love with a very beautiful lady, who, until the first gentleman in Europe favoured her with his attentions, was an opera singer. She subsequently became the mother of a family, who were all provided for by their delighted father, the king. The eldest son was created Duke of Fitz-Musicus, and he and his family were endowed with a perpetual pension for ‘distinguished services rendered to the State, you know.’”

“Then you are not a little boy?” queried the giantess. “But of course you must be. Come here, my little dear, and tell me who taught you to say those funny things, and who pasted that queer little moustache on your face.”

As she spoke she actually stooped, kissed the Honourable Augustus Fitz-Musicus on the forehead, and patted him playfully on the cheek with one shapely finger. This was, however, an indignity not to be borne patiently, and the recipient of these well-meant attentions indignantly sprang on one side, his face scarlet, and his voice tremulous with humiliated wrath.

“How dare you?” he gasped. “How dare you insult me so? You must know that I am not a child. Your own hugeness need not prevent you from seeing that I am a man.”

“A man! never! O, this is too splendid a joke to enjoy by myself.” Saying this, and laughing until the tears came into her eyes, the goddess raised her voice a little, and called to some companions who were evidently close at hand, “Myra! Hilda! Agnes! oh, do come quickly. I have found two such curious creatures.”

In response to this summons three more girls of gigantic stature came from the further end of the garden, and completed our discomfiture by joining in the laugh against us.

“What funny little things! Wherever did you find them, Dora?” queried one of the new comers, whereat Dora composed her risible faculties as well as she was able, and explained that she had just found us where we were, and that one of us claimed to be a man.

Myra and Agnes were quite as amused at this as Dora had been, but Hilda took the situation somewhat more seriously. She had noted how furious the Honourable Augustus Fitz-Musicus looked, and observed my vain attempt to assume a dignified demeanour in the presence of such a formidable array of playful goddesses, who now all plied us with questions together.

I did not feel much inclined to converse, for I was terribly afraid of being ridiculed. But Hilda questioned me so much more sensibly, in my opinion, than the others, that I was disposed to be more communicative to her than to them.

“Where do you come from?” she questioned gently, as if she were afraid of injuring me by using her normal voice.

“I am English,” I replied proudly, feeling quite sure that the very name of my beloved native land would prove a talisman of value in any part of the globe. But although the beautiful quartette refrained from laughing, they listened to me in mystified astonishment, partly, I perceived, because my small voice was a revelation to them, and partly because my answer conveyed no understandable meaning to them.

“English,” at last said Agnes. “What do you mean by English? There is no such nation now. I believe that centuries ago Teuto-Scotland used to be called England, and that it used to be inhabited by the English, a warlike race which is now extinct.”

“My dear Agnes,” interposed Hilda, “You surely forget that we are ourselves descended from this great race. But suppose we go on with our questions. Not so fast my little man; here, I will take care of you for the present.”

The last exclamation was evoked by an attempt on the part of the Honourable Augustus to escape while the attention of the party was concentrated upon myself. He was, however, foiled in his attempt, and Hilda coolly seated him upon a tall garden seat, as if he were a baby, and kept a detaining hand on his wrist, while she listened to the replies I now made to my tormentors. “What is your name?” was the next interrogatory to which I was subjected. I did not consider it necessary to go into details, so merely gave my name. Other questions were now asked me, but I was so determined to give no food for ridicule, if I could help it, that I was rather obstinate in refusing information, and at last took refuge in the remark, delivered as quietly as my tingling nerves would permit, “That in my country people were polite to strangers, and did not interrogate them as if they were so many wild beasts.”

Even while giving utterance to this remark, I remembered several scenes which proved that it was far from true. But the goddesses did not know this much, and my reproof served to convince them that the Honourable Augustus and myself were not monkeys that had learnt the art of speech, and been dressed for exhibition, but actual, though very queer, specimens of the human race divine.

Apologies for their rudeness were now freely tendered by the giantesses, and one of them proposed to take us into the house at once and supply us with refreshments. No sooner said than done, and I hardly know whether I was most amused or humiliated to find myself led by the hand, as if I were only just learning to walk, and must be carefully guarded from stumbling.

It was some consolation to observe that the Honourable Augustus was served likewise, and that he was lifted up the huge steps which must be ascended to enter the house just as easily as I was. We were taken into a large hall, which seemingly served as a refectory, for I observed a table in the centre, upon which many covers were laid.

Just at this juncture a great bell was rung somewhere in the building, and about fifty other individuals entered the room, but crowded round us instead of round the table, as was evidently their first intention. They were, however, upon the whole, quite as polite as a room full of English people would be, were our respective positions reversed, and Hilda constituted herself our protector from bothering questions until dinner was served. The seats and table were on a somewhat larger scale than I had been hitherto used to, but a cushion considerately brought for me made me comfortable enough.

While being quizzed by such a number of eyes, I diligently used my own, and noted that all these magnificent creatures, except six, were apparently young students, and that they were all habited in somewhat similar fashion to Dora, such difference as there was consisting, not in shape or cut, but in variety of material and colouring.

The six exceptions were perfectly beautiful women, all approaching middle age, and with less exuberance of spirit, but more dignity of manner than the others. Their dress also was slightly different, their tunics being ornamented with rich facings, and their sashes, worn on the right side, being composed of a gorgeous material something like cloth of gold, but so soft in texture as to drape gracefully.

A number of attendants served the meal, and these were all attired in the national garb, with the exception of the sashes, while their clothes were, for the most part, composed of washing materials, in which they looked very pictures of neatness and cleanliness.

As soon as the meal had begun, we were less scrutinised than we had been, and I now discovered myself to be very hungry, and disposed to do full justice to the appetising viands set before me. There was a variety of dainty dishes to choose from, and much fruit, all of which was marvellously sweet and luscious. But there was no dish that I could see prepared from animal food, and I resolved to discover later whether such a strange omission was of regular or only occasional occurrence.

CHAPTER II.

After dinner was over the students indulged in conversation. I discovered afterwards that music usually formed a prominent feature in after dinner amusements, but to-day the Honourable Augustus and myself afforded sufficient food for pastime. We were, however, not exactly mobbed, though our audience was a large one in every sense of the word. One thing puzzled me exceedingly. When I spoke awhile ago of being “English,” my interrogators seemed thoroughly mystified, and yet they were speaking my native tongue in all its insular purity. Evidently there was a good deal to explain on all sides.

Augustus Fitz-Musicus had by this time got over his chagrin, and was, I could tell, even congratulating himself in a mild sort of way over the fact that he was proving a much greater source of attraction than I was. He was receiving the attentions of this bevy of big beauties with such a ridiculous air of conceited nonchalance, that I was provoked to laughter, in spite of my polite attempt to restrain my mirth.

Myra comprehended the cause of my amusement, and whispered, “I see, little lady, that the male biped is the same all the world over,—a conglomeration of conceit and arrogance. Your little man looks too funny for anything, and yet I will warrant that he thinks himself capable of captivating one half of us. What is he thought of in your country?”

But to this question I was unable to give a satisfactory answer, as I could only say that I was perfectly ignorant of everything connected with the Honourable Augustus, never having seen him in my life until to-day.

This reply amazed Myra and others who heard it, but further interrogations on her part were stopped for a little while by the advent of the Lady Principal and two of the professors, who wished to speak with me and to know how I came to be here.

The young students respectfully made way for them, and I confess that my sensations on beholding them approached something very near akin to awe. The Lady Principal, especially, was a being to be remembered. In height she was somewhat superior to the others. Her features were so perfect in outline and expression that I think Minerva must have looked like this woman did. There was not one among all these women who did not look the embodiment of health. Principal Helen Grey did more than this; she seemed to me to be the goddess of health herself, and to be capable of endowing others with this most to be prized earthly blessing.

She sat down beside me, and gently asked me who I was, and how I happened to be here. My answer to the effect that I did not know how I had got here was evidently a tax on her credulity, but she was too well bred to do aught but listen quietly while I continued my explanations.

I told of my perusal of certain magazines, and how my feelings had been strongly excited upon one subject, until I must have gone to sleep while thinking of it. Then I described my awaking amid strange surroundings, and that I supposed the Honourable Fitz-Musicus had been transported hither also. My account of our first interview with each other provoked amusement, and every face around me rippled with smiles.

After a few moment’s musing, Principal Grey asked me what I meant by saying that a certain article deprecated the introduction of Women’s Suffrage into my country. “Do you mean to say,” she asked, “that men are the only voters in your country?”

“Yes,” I replied, “and men are not the only obstacle to woman’s advancement in England. Only a small minority of women dare avow their real opinions on this very subject. More stupid and less enlightened females hurl all sorts of contemptible reproaches at them for presuming to endeavour to better the condition of their sex. All the laws of my country have been made by men, and they are all made in the interests of men. It is only a few years since it was possible for a married woman to hold property in her own right. She might earn, or in any other way acquire, a large fortune. Her husband could take and squander every penny of it, without the least fear of being taxed with having done more than he had a perfect right to do.” “Your England, as you call it, must be a strange country,” said Principal Grey. “But I cannot quite make out where it is. I am not considered ignorant in matters appertaining to history and geography, but I am unable to locate this England of yours. Once upon a time, a matter of a thousand years ago, the neighbouring island, which is now called Teuto-Scotland, was called Albion, and later on England, but we have always understood ourselves to be the only race living which is at all representative of England and the ancient English.”

“And what country is this?” I enquired in my turn, marvelling much to hear this giantess speak of “the ancient English.”

“This country is New Amazonia. A long time ago it was called Erin by some, but Ireland was the name it was best known by. It used to be the scene of perpetual strife and warfare. Our archives tell us that it was subjugated by the warlike English, and that it suffered for centuries from want and oppression. The land was appropriated by English mercenaries, who exacted enormous rents, which they spent anywhere but in Ireland. Famines, attempted revolutions and conspiracies, unjust repressive laws, and all sorts of calamities are said to have ruined and depopulated the country until the wars arose which resulted in our coming here. But as all is so strange here to you, you shall, if you care about it, be taken out this evening, and then you will be better able to judge what sort of people we are. Meanwhile, our duties must be attended to. Hilda, be good enough to take this woman to your room, until we can make other arrangements, and—oh dear, there is the little gentleman! What shall we do with him?”

The Honourable Augustus was being conducted through the principal reception rooms of the college, for such the building was, and the question of his ultimate disposal could be discussed without the embarrassment which his presence might perhaps have entailed.

“Suppose we request Mr. Medlock to take him until he decides what his future arrangements will be?” suggested Professor Wise, a lady who had hitherto taken no part in the conversation. “It would never do to let him sleep in the college for a night! The poor little thing’s character would be irretrievably compromised.”

“Of course it would,” agreed Principal Grey, and she set about making the necessary arrangements forthwith, while I, wondering if I had been asleep for five or six centuries, followed Hilda to the upper story in which her sleeping room was situated. But long before I reached it I felt tired to death. The marble stairs were exceedingly massive, and were apparently interminable, while the beautiful banister rails were too large for me to grasp them with my hand, and thus help myself up. I was at last compelled to sit down exhausted, feeling that not one more step could I mount.

Hilda looked at me in astonishment, as I sat panting with my unwonted exertions. “Is it possible,” she cried, “that the walk up these few steps has exhausted you? You must be ill, or is it the fault of the queer clothes that you wear that you are incapable of taking exercise? But whichever way it is, you cannot sit here, so be kind enough to excuse me.”

The next moment I was lifted up as if I were a child, and Hilda ran nimbly up another long flight of steps with me, finally depositing me in a room that was very handsomely furnished, though most of the articles in it were of a style the like whereof I had never seen before. Seeing that I had apparently been Rip-van-Winkelized for about six hundred years, this is not at all surprising.

But I could not help noticing a piano, which was the facsimile of one which was in my own possession before I fell asleep. In fact, I had an idea that it was the very same piano, though how it got here I could not imagine. Hilda saw me looking at it, and did not remove my mystification by remarking, “Yes, it is a curious old thing, isn’t it, and in excellent preservation, I believe. We have several more of them in the capital, all formerly owned by Englishwomen who originally settled in Dublin after the wars.”

“Then is this Dublin?” I asked. “If so, I am not so very far from home, after all.”

“This place used to be called Dublin in the time of the ancient Irish, but when the country was turned over to what was then contemptuously called ‘petticoat government,’ nearly all place-names were changed, and the names of famous women applied to them. Thus we have Fawcetville, Beecherstown, Weldonia, Besantsville, Jarrettburn, and hundreds of other names, the etymological origin of which is easily traceable. In fact, it is one of our laws that no town or village shall receive a name which does not commemorate some woman who has done all she could to advance the interests of her sex.”

Our conversation lasted awhile longer, but Hilda had her studies to attend to, and after reaching several books from a bookshelf for me to amuse myself with during her absence, she left me for awhile to my own devices promising to do all she could to make my visit a pleasant one.

There were many things here to arouse my curiosity, but I was most anxious to see if the books were printed in a style which I could understand, as I hoped to gain a great deal of information relative to the strange land in which I found myself, through no effort of will on my own part.

Fortunately I found the type and paper very beautiful, and with the exception that the spelling was considerably more phonetic than that in vogue with us, I found very little difference between our language as at present printed, and as exponed in the pages of “The History of Amazonia,” which was the first book I opened.

I must have spent at least two hours in close reading, and if anyone would like to know the results of my investigations in posthumous history, she or he will find them recorded in the next chapter.

CHAPTER III.

The history began with a brief resumé of such events as school books had long ago made me tolerably familiar with, but went on to say that it was in the reign of Victoria that the incidents which ultimately resulted in the disruption of the British Empire took place, though the final decisive steps did not eventuate until towards the close of the reign of her successor, who used his utmost endeavours to secure justice for all his subjects. But the factious discontent had been growing for so many years, that it was impossible for him, when he did at last come into power, to retrieve all the errors, and undo all the mischief, which had been done during the reign of his predecessor.

Ireland especially was troublesome, for it had always been made to feel that it was a subjugated State. The Sovereign sedulously petted and spoiled the northern portion of her dominions, and was so inordinately fond of everything Scotch, that even the English grew jealous, when year after year the Sovereign’s chief desire seemed to be to prove that she possessed no English sympathies whatever, and that she positively declined to show the light of her countenance to any but Scotch subjects or German relatives, if she could help it.

The principal emoluments of the State fell to the share of alien Germans, and British taxpayers were ground to the dust, while scores of thousands of pounds of their money crossed the Channel for the support of Germans, some of whom were not too illustriously born, but all of whom found favour in the eyes of Victoria Regina.

A great deal of encouragement being thus given to the Germans and Scots, who were always willing to accept conditions to which the English found it impossible to bow, England became over-run with them, so much so, indeed, that the natives of the soil found it necessary to emigrate to other countries, in order to earn their livelihood, and England itself gradually became the principal abiding-place of a hybrid race, who were known as Teuto-Scots.

All this time Ireland languished in a state of neglect and discontent, which was eventually fanned into a fierce flame in consequence of the treatment bestowed by the English Government upon certain patriots whom they revered. There were several facsimile copies of allegorical documents which so evidently referred to events which occurred in my own time in England, and which were so prominently instanced as the predisposing causes of the Irish revolution, that I subsequently took the trouble of copying one of them, and give it in full as follows:—

CAROLUS PATRIOTUS.

A POLITICAL ALLEGORY.

And lo! there dwelt in this country a man whose name was Carolus. And this Carolus, who was surnamed Patriotus, looked with bitterness upon the wickedness of the oppressor, and said unto his friends and disciples, “Verily, I can no longer look upon the tribulations of my people, but will gird up my loins, and will set forth on a pilgrimage to the land of the oppressor.”

And behold after many days he came to Londinensis, the chief city of the Albionites, and saw that which was not good in his sight. But he met many people who sate him at their board, and who looked upon him as the deliverer of his people. Unto them he said, “Verily, I will lift up my voice, so that it shall be heard of all the nations. And I will open the eyes of the people, so that they shall no longer look with favour upon the evil doings of their chief rulers. And I will say unto them, ‘Cast your eyes upon Erinea, the country of my forefathers, and behold how my brethren gnash their teeth, and struggle in vain under the yoke of the spoiler and misruler.’ And I will call upon them to give me their help in the deliverance of my people. And my nation shall bless those who lift up their voices for Erinea.”

And behold all these things came to pass.

And the friends of Carolus, surnamed Patriotus, said unto him, “It is well that thou shouldest do this great thing. And, verily, we will aid thee. Our houses shall be thy houses, and our purses shall be thy purses, until the great things which thou prophesiest shall come to pass.”

And Carolus, surnamed Patriotus, lifted up his voice against the oppressor, yea, even in the assembly of the rulers of the Albionites did he lift up his voice, and many disciples followed him.

But there was a great prince in Londinensis, the chief city of the Albionites, who waxed wroth at the preachings of Carolus, and who looked upon his teachings as evil. The name of this prince was Tempus Londinus, and he said unto his servants, “Yea, verily, this Carolus is a seditious man, and we must banish him from the great house of the people, else will he conquer us, and the power of the Albionites will be as naught in the eyes of the nations.”

And there came unto the steward of Tempus, surnamed Londinus, a man named Dupus Journalius. This man longed for riches, and knew much that was pleasing to the steward of Tempus. Unto him he saith, “Lo, thy servant hath travelled far to satisfy thy desires, and to please my lord the prince. He has been to the chief city of the Erinians, and has spoken to a man who dwells there. This man has a sword, made by Carolus, and nothing but the poison which is worked into this sword can destroy Carolus, surnamed Patriotus. Carolus made this sword in order to destroy his enemies, but lo! he is now himself in their toils, and shall feel the hand of the smiter.”

And the steward of the mighty Tempus said unto Dupus, he that was surnamed Journalius, “Fetch this man hither, that we may behold this weapon.”

But Dupus answered and said, “Not so, my lord, for this thing is wonderful, and Judas Dublinus will not sell it but for a great price. Yea, verily, the price is great.”

Then said the chief steward unto Dupus, “Go thy way, and return unto me to-morrow, when thou shalt see the mighty prince Tempus and his high priests, and they shall give thee an answer.”

And when Dupus returned on the morrow, he prostrated himself before Tempus Londinus and his high priests, and they looked with favour upon him, and gave him great wealth, saying, “Go thou to Judas, surnamed Dublinus, and give him of thy wealth, and say unto him, ‘Verily I have spoken of thee to the rulers of the Albionites, and thou and thy doings have found favour in their sight. Moreover, thou shalt not be punished for thy sins, but if thou wilt render unto me the poisoned sword wherewith to destroy Carolus, surnamed Patriotus, thou shalt dwell in the tents of the righteous.’”

And Dupus journeyed to the chief city of the Erinians, and told all those things unto Judas, surnamed Dublinus, who answered and said, “Yea, verily, my lord hath done well by his servant. Here is the sword which shall destroy Carolus, surnamed Patriotus.”

Therefore Dupus was filled with joy, and hastened to carry the sword to the mighty prince of the Albionites. And the prince was well pleased with him, and many of the chief rulers of the people also rejoiced with him, saying unto each other, “Now we shall be delivered from the teachings of this vile impostor, and our country shall prosper, for the false prophet of Erinia is vanquished, and his disciples shall be scattered over all the earth.”

But lo! and behold! a wonder came to pass. For when the high priests of Tempus Londinus hurled the poisoned sword, which Carolus was said to have wrought with his own hands, yea, when it was hurled at Carolus, he valiantly seized the sword, and fought his enemies therewith, so that those who thought to see him fall dead were amazed at his vigour.

But although Carolus did not die, he was sick for many days, and many people prophesied that his end was near, while his enemies said, “Rejoice, and be glad, for the foe is slain, and our enemies are crestfallen and hang their heads in shame!”

But there were others who said, “Nay, he shall not die, but shall live to plant the foot of scorn upon the neck of his enemy. We will give freely of our treasure, and we will carry him to the great apothecary, Carolus Magnus, and lo! he will heal his wounds, and lay bare the foul sores of the slanderers.”

And all the Erinians cried aloud unto Carolus Magnus, saying, “Save our apostle, and let him not perish under the heel of his enemy.”

Now Carolus, surnamed Magnus, was skilled in the art of healing, and it came to pass after many days that Carolus, surnamed Patriotus, recovered from his grievous sickness, and henceforth the great prince and his high priests looked with disfavour upon Dupus Journalius.

And Tempus Londinus was exceeding wroth, and sent for Judas, surnamed Dublinus. But the heart of Judas was filled with fear, so that he repented him of what he had done, and wandered afar off, sending unto Tempus and his high priests a message, saying, “Verily, I am a sinner, and have led a mighty prince into error. The sword which should have destroyed Carolus, surnamed Patriotus, was of a truth poisoned, but the poison lurks in the hilt, not in the point, of the weapon. If my lord falls sick thereof, let him not blame his servant Judas, who was tempted by the promise of great riches. And where Judas goes, let no man follow.”

And the people clamoured for vengeance upon Judas and the hunters were set upon the track of the betrayer and he fell into their hands. But when they took their eyes from him, he sprang into the outermost darkness, and the inhabitants of the earth knew him no more.

And Tempus Londinus was in his turn grievously sick. But as for Carolus Patriotus, he grew mightier than ever, and there was rejoicing in Erinia when he triumphed over his enemies.

CHAPTER IV.

But although this Carolus Patriotus was thus allegorically announced to be the victor, his country still suffered for a long time at the hands of its rulers. Disaffection and jealousy, increased in many places by the disinclination of the discontented ones to relieve themselves honourably of their burdens, caused certain practices to arise in Erinia or Ireland, which only aggravated the reigning misery.

A custom called “boycotting” prevailed, whereby all those who were suspected or proved to be unpatriotic were deprived of all communication with those who might possibly be induced to do business with them. People caught conveying food or other necessaries to boycotted persons were ruthlessly shot, and very often horrible cruelties were perpetrated upon harmless cattle, in order to show that their owners had fallen under the ban.

Morality became a thing unknown in the country. Farms and houses were rented from landholders, who had no other source of income, by people who meant to live upon the produce of the land, but who were resolved not to pay anything for the privilege. This was accounted quite an honourable thing to do, and the worst crime of which an Irish farmer could be accused of being guilty was “paying his rent.”

Murder was an excusable necessity, but rent-paying was a crime punishable by death. Hence landlords found no encouragement to prove themselves deserving of confidence. Whole estates went to rack and ruin. The really earnest reformers found it impossible to fight longer against the prevailing misery, and emigrated in large numbers, so that the country at last fell into a state of complete anarchy.

There were many politicians whose sole exertions were directed towards securing to Ireland privileges which would put it on an equal footing with the sister isle, but other troubles fell upon Great Britain, and, as had often happened before, the affairs of Ireland were set aside in order that other grave difficulties might be grappled with.

Several British colonies and dependencies became alienated. The whole of the Australian dependencies threw off the yoke of England. The French became the ultimate possessors of Newfoundland, owing to the supineness of the Government to which it looked for protection. A treaty between the United States and France was the means of robbing England of Canada, and in order to prevent the loss of further slices of the Empire, Great Britain was obliged to maintain a large standing army and navy.

There were a great many republicans in the House of Commons, and these people always played upon one string. They urged that all the troubles and worries of the English had their origin in the huge sums of money which were paid to the Royal family, which ever grew more exacting and rapacious in its demands for money. So powerfully did the republicans appeal to the nation that many of the royalists began to consider the situation anxiously, and feared lest the reigning dynasty should be dethroned, and England be turned into a republic.

Others, however, considered that so much had been done to conciliate the Germans and Scots, who were both brave and of great skill in warfare, that an alliance with them could be safely counted upon in the event of a civil war breaking out.

Meanwhile France was also the scene of great political changes. The people had once more tired of the republic, and, with their usual extremeness, had once more rejoiced at the coronation of an Emperor. Bourbonists, Orleanists, and Bonapartists were alike powerless in the election of a supreme ruler, and their respective claims were all set on one side in favour of an obscure adventurer, who, emulating Napoleon, had used the army as the step-ladder for his ambition. The French nation, jealous of the fast-increasing power of its big German neighbour, gladly placed in supreme command a man who, among other things, promised to make the hated Teuton lick the dust.

Russian Autocracy was fast becoming a thing of the past, but Germany steadily grew in power, until it threatened to emulate the days of Charlemagne, and engulph all the countries between which it was sandwiched.

Such was the condition of some of the principal countries of Europe when the Irish, resolved no longer to “groan under the yoke of the oppressor,” formed themselves into a secret society which embraced nearly all the nation; held many clandestine meetings, at which all manner of dark things were plotted; and finally invoked the aid of France in a grand fight which they were going to make for independence and freedom.

France readily agreed to the alliance, the proposal having apparently come at a most opportune time. The French always thirst for power; they are somewhat credulous as a nation; and are so vain as to be continually overestimating their own might and prowess. Add to this, that their Emperor was still new fledged, and still had to fulfil his promises of aggrandizement, and it will readily be believed that there was little difficulty in persuading France to become Ireland’s ally in her crusade against England.

Not that France was honestly bent upon unselfishly befriending another country. It was thought that, once firmly fixed on Irish soil, with an army in occupation, it was simply a question of changing the absolute rulership of the Emerald Isle in favour of Gallia. Certain emoluments and prerogatives were to be given to the principal Irish leaders, as a sop to Cerberus, but the principal plums of conquest were to be reserved for Frenchmen, as soon as “Albion la perfide” was fairly vanquished.

Glorious visions of coming wealth and greatness filled the minds of the thousands who, led by the brand-new Emperor himself, swarmed into Ireland, and prepared, in conjunction with their red-hot allies, to smash England’s greatness into infinitesimal fragments. Naturally the army was fêted and entertained, but it was unfortunate that so much of the product of the native distilleries should have been consumed in drinking confusion to their enemies, for Bacchus always was, and always will be, a treacherous friend, and he had something to answer for respecting the ruin, utter, black, and entire, which erelong overtook his votaries.

As England’s statesmen had foreseen, they were able to count upon mighty aid from the Scots and Germans, and in their opinion the issue of the forthcoming struggle was a foregone conclusion. But Germany had to be very wary and circumspect, for Russia and Austria considered this a capital time to combine with France and bring about the disruption of the big German Empire. There was even a treaty signed, by virtue of which the three allied emperors were to share Germany very equitably, in event of conquest.

They counted upon Switzerland remaining neutral, but were slightly taken aback when Italy’s army, which was now a very large one, was placed at the disposal of England and Germany, thus enabling the latter country to render powerful help to England, without imperilling its own safety very much.

The war did not last long. When Ireland struck the blow for liberty, both Irish and French fought well; the former goaded by desperation and a desire for revenge; the latter by cupidity and vain-gloriousness. But their valour was futile, and there came a day when their united forces were utterly vanquished, and scarcely an Irish or French soldier was left to show that there had once been a united army.

Fortunately for himself, the Emperor was slain in battle. Otherwise, with nothing but a list of ignominious defeats to show in what manner he had been able to keep his brilliant promises, he would have been disgraced by a nation that was once more enraged at having shown how huge was its capacity for being duped.

It soon transpired, however, that the residue of the French people had need to think of something else besides avenging failures. The enemies of France seized their opportunity; invaded it; conquered it; and divided it, undeterred by the pusillanimous threats of Russians and Austrians, who judged it wisest not to take to arms when the situation of France grew so desperate.

Thus did France cease to be an independent European power, and thus also were finally exterminated the Irish as a nation, for they were brave, and did not yield, so long as a man could fight.

In England there was great rejoicing, and so many honours were heaped upon Germans and Scots, that there was not an opening left for an Englishman to lift himself into prominence. The Government of the country gradually fell entirely into the hands of these aliens, and Englishmen formed so small a minority of the population that a proposal to change the name of the country from England to Teuto-Scotland was placed before Parliament, and carried by acclamation.

All record of England, so far as its constitutional policy was concerned, finished here, and I know not whether a ruler in the direct line of succession remained upon the throne, or whether a republic was the immediate outcome of all these changes or not. I learnt subsequently, however, from the lips of Hilda, that at the time of my visit to New Amazonia, the chief officer of state in Teuto-Scotland was a “People’s Agent,” who only remained two years in office, and was then replaced by such successor, either male or female, as might be elected by universal suffrage.

CHAPTER V.

Since the Irish people had been completely conquered, it behoved England to take such measures as would conduce to the future prosperity of the island, and at the same time guard against disaffection and rebellion. There was much consulting and advising. The Irish question was as prominent as ever. All manner of plans were proposed, but were all in turn rejected as unfeasible.

After several sessions had been wasted in fruitless debates and in noisy discussions, whereof the only result arrived at was a certain amount of forensic display on the part of ambitious members, a proposition was mooted which at first amazed all who heard it. Then it was ridiculed unmercifully. Next it was discussed seriously. Finally it was adopted, amid universal enthusiasm.

For centuries the combined effects of war, seafaring, and emigration had been to reduce the male population of England to such an extent as to cause the female portion of the population to preponderate enormously. So much so, in fact, that not a trade or profession which had hitherto been regarded by men as sacred to themselves was uninvaded by feminine competitors, who, considerably to the dismay of adult masculinity, were steadily proving themselves capable of doing well all that they undertook to do.

For every man in the community to support three women was an impossibility, even if he had desired to do so, which he certainly did not. Women who did not marry were expected to keep themselves. But by way of showing how strictly and impartially just the male biped can be, there prevailed a peculiar system of payment, which bore its natural result of discontent and protest.

For instance, in Messrs. Workemphast’s establishment several women were engaged as assistants. They performed their work more neatly and deftly than their masculine rivals, but were paid only half as much for their services, simply because they were women. The result in all such cases was that other expensive men were ousted to make room for some more underpaid women, the consequence being that none but the employers were satisfied.

The men had an idea that although it was only right that woman should not be a burden on man, she had no business to invade his particular province of labour. The women, on the other hand, considered themselves entitled to equal pay with the men, provided their work was equal.

On other grounds, too, they had ample cause for complaint. Women householders were compelled to pay quite as heavy rates and taxes as men, but were debarred from every privilege to which equal payment of tribute morally entitled them. Although made to provide the necessary funds for governing the country, they were not merely debarred from holding office, but were even prohibited from having a voice in the election of such members of the favoured sex as aspired to be the rulers of the land.

A woman might pay a large share of her income towards the expenses of the Government. She might employ a dozen servants, such as gardeners, grooms, coachmen, gamekeepers, etc., but although each of the men dependent upon her for a livelihood, no matter how stupid, ignorant, or loutish they might be, was accorded the privilege of voting, their clever, accomplished mistress was considered to belong to an inferior order of beings, to whom it would be unwise to accord privileges, seeing that they were not supposed to have sufficient sense to use these privileges wisely.

Again. Adultery alone on the part of a wife was quite sufficient ground for a divorce in favour of the husband, but a wife must have a husband who, in addition to being persistently and openly unfaithful, cruelly ill-treated her, and took a cowardly advantage of the superiority of strength he had attained through having systematically deprived woman of every health-giving recreation, before the law, made by men for the benefit of men, would afford her relief from her daily tortures.

It is on record that a judge, when a woman was being tried for the presumed murder of her husband, dwelt with such horror upon the most dreadful fact that she had been unfaithful to her husband, and proved so conclusively that a woman who could be unfaithful was capable of every crime under the sun, that the jury, remembering that their interests as husbands must be protected, sentenced the woman to be hanged, although medical witnesses showed that she could not be a murderess, seeing that the cause of her husband’s death was a drug of which he was proved to have been a systematic partaker.

From this it will be argued that purity of living held high rank with the English. But this was by no means the case, for in the same decade the rebellion and protests of women were naturally aroused by the foulest and most disgusting legislation that ever disgraced the land. This was the State regulation of vice, whereby the most respectable women were liable to be subjected to brutal indignities, in order that no precaution might be neglected which would ensure for men complete immunity from the consequences of systematic libertinism and immorality.

This may sound paradoxical, but it is not the less sickening in its shameful reality, and serves to show the hollowness and insincerity of masculine legislators.

It is small wonder that these and other crying evils brought forth the fruits they did. Systematic injustice roused the antipathy of women who, besides having sense enough to argue their own case, had sufficient moral courage to brave the animadversion which was levelled at them by the arrogant idiots of the one sex, and the unreasoning imbeciles of the other.

Hence the expressions which we come across at times, which to modern New Amazonians unacquainted with history are unintelligible, but which had their own bitter meaning at the time they were in use. “Bluestocking” was a term of opprobrium levelled at women who strove to improve their moral and intellectual status by means of study. A “Woman’s Rights’ Advocate” was described as an individual who was the fit butt for the laughter and derision of the rest of the community.

To be strong-minded was a wonderful claim to respect in a man. Men were fond of speaking of women as the “weak-minded,” and, therefore, inferior sex, and yet the moment a woman proved herself to be not weak-minded but strong-minded, she was regarded as an anomaly, and sneered at as a being who had unsexed herself. To be “only a woman” was equivalent in the minds of many male egotists to being only “something better than his dog, and something dearer than his horse,” and yet, no sooner did she prove herself gifted with abilities hitherto cherished as exclusively masculine, and, therefore, infinitely superior to womanly attributes, than she was said to have become “masculine,” and regarded as an object of horror. To be a woman was to be one unit of a despised race, and yet to “unsex” herself was one of the most opprobrious faults of which a woman could be guilty!

Could anything be more idiotic or paradoxical? And is it to be wondered at that it became necessary for men to prove their vaunted superiority? And that they were gradually impelled, from sheer fear of the future, to grant the demands of the sex which was rapidly learning to estimate itself at its true value?

No struggle recorded in history can compare with the fight against oppression which was now carried on by the brave and noble ancestresses of whom we have such good reason to be proud. Many and disheartening were the defeats they endured, but gloriously triumphant was their final victory, of which our existence as an independent nation was the outcome.

Universal Suffrage! Wonderful was the jubilation when it became an accomplished fact. And wonderful were its effects upon the nation. All the anomalies above described were wiped away, and women showed themselves so much more just, and so much more capable of governing than men, that they invariably enacted none but strictly fair and impartial regulations.

Thus Boards of Guardians consisted of an equal number of women and men. The latter superintended many details as formerly, but were relieved from the sole responsibility of seeing after the babies’ feeding bottles, and the mothers’ needs, and the old women’s baths, which they had until now considered their own especial province.

Formerly none but male inspectors were allowed to perambulate the schools, at the expense of the country, and adjudicate as to the quality of make, and perfection of cut, of the underclothing for women which the girls were instructed to prepare for examination. Strange to say, it was not without considerable opposition that women were admitted to be fit to usurp this cherished masculine prerogative.

From time immemorial the fact that all doctors were men had proved a serious calamity, for thousands of women let their infirmities grow upon them until it was too late to save their lives, simply because they were reluctant to confide the details of their ailments to members of the other sex, who in most cases were complete strangers to them. And yet the universities were for ages shut in the face of women who were anxious to remedy these evils, and many and hard were the rebuffs and insults which were endured by the first women who succeeded in removing all barriers and in passing the examinations which qualified them as M.D.’s.

Houses were erected on principles which men regarded as perfect, but which women invariably found to be wofully deficient in matters appertaining to hygiene and comfort. Since women became architects these evils were also remedied, and as their augmented influence now penetrated everywhere, a great change of necessity came over the whole nation, and paved the way for one of the greatest political events the world has ever seen.

This was the resolve to colonise Ireland with the women who outnumbered the men so enormously in Teuto-Scotland.

It was duly remembered that the country had hitherto never managed to support itself, and that its periodical famines had been a source of enormous expense to Teuto-Scotland, which even now was voting large sums for the support of the widows and children of the men who had fallen in the late disastrous rebellion.

Many debates were, therefore, held respecting the annual amount which should henceforth be devoted to the maintenance of Teuto-Scottish authority in Ireland. But careful thought on the part of the greatest leaders of the colonisation movement resulted in the island being altogether given up to the sole rule and governance of the chief colonists. “Home Rule” was the watchword, and it was finally agreed that a treaty of alliance should be signed, whereby Ireland, or New Amazonia as it was henceforth called, should maintain friendly relations with the mother-country, but should be a perfectly self-governing and independent State, exempt from any allegiance but that of friendliness, and a mutual desire to prevent the encroachments of foreigners.

In return for so immense a concession, it was stipulated that New Amazonia should now be self-supporting, and very few but enthusiasts, remembering the past history of the island, believed in anything but a total collapse of the new government.

Fortunately for our land, there were vast numbers of enthusiastic believers in the available resources of New Amazonia, and in the capacity of its chosen leaders, so that the fifty millions of pounds, with which it was necessary to be equipped, in order to start the new enterprise on a sound basis, was raised in a remarkably short time.

Three and a half per cent. consols were issued, and were eagerly bought up by the enormous numbers of women who desired to become colonists in the new republic, and to partake of the advantages and opportunities, which would then be theirs. Great financiers were also found willing to become partners in this novel syndicate, and as the consols were bought up in every European country, every European country was directly interested in the prosperity of New Amazonia, and the spirit and courage of its leaders was the prominent topic of conversation in the whole of the civilised world.

CHAPTER VI.

It was intended that the government should consist of a Leader, two Prime Advisers, twelve Privy Counsellors, and two hundred-and-fifty Tribunes, all elected by the people. As a preliminary measure, however, only fifty Inaugurators were chosen by the Teuto-Scottish Parliament, and upon these devolves the selection of the swarms of women who clamoured to become members of the new republic. The Inaugurators were divided into five committees, consisting of ten members each. These were named respectively the Financial, the Medical, the Social, the Political, and the Religious.

The Financial Committee was the first which the candidate had to face. No woman was accepted for membership who could not invest a certain sum of money in New Amazonian consols. This rule served a twofold purpose. It prevented the intrusion of women whose poverty would make them a burden to the rest of the community, which above all things required a fair start. And, by making every member a partner in the monetary venture, it ensured the personal interest of every inhabitant of the country in its permanent prosperity.

The Medical Committee was next entrusted with a careful examination of all those who had been able to satisfy Committee number one. Every woman who bore the slightest trace of disease or malformation about her was rigorously rejected, and those who passed the second stage satisfactorily were handed over to the tender mercies of the Social Committee, whose mission it was to enquire into the antecedents of the candidates, and weed out such as were likely to prove discreditable to the rest.

Few of the women, having reached this stage of the examinations, found any difficulty in agreeing to the conditions of committees four and five. They were simply required to take an oath of allegiance to the new government, and to swear to obey any laws or rules which might be made by the Constitution. They also vowed to merge all religious differences, and to conform to whatever religious doctrines might be ultimately agreed upon as a safe basis for the establishment of a national church.

When all these preliminaries were duly gone through, the candidate paid her money, received satisfactory security for it, signed certain documents, and was henceforth a duly enrolled citizen of New Amazonia, pledged to respect all its laws, and entitled to participate in all its benefits.

When the inaugural committees, satisfied that the enterprise could now be floated without further delay, decided to remove the scene of their operations to Dublin, as the capital city of the new republic had hitherto been called, there was great excitement in London.

A banquet was given in honour of the pioneers of the movement, and the Teuto-Scottish Government entered so cordially into the spirit of the great enterprise, as to ensure free travelling expenses to their future home to all accepted New Amazonians who were willing to avail themselves of the privilege.

In many cases this was a great boon, for although no men were accepted as colonists, the future was provided for by the admission of all the healthy children of enrolled citizens. As only a small proportion of the adventurers were women who had been married, the number of children was small enough to be comfortably provided for.

Proclamations had been issued announcing many benefits which were to fall to the lot of the very small remnant of the Irish nation, and it was anticipated that when they found themselves to be enjoying equal privileges with the new comers they would lose the resentful demeanour they had hitherto maintained, and be amenable to the dictates of kindness and reason.

It was many years, however, before the last flickerings of their discontent were extinguished, and before they could be induced to take kindly to the mode of living universally enforced throughout the country. This end being finally attained, the mingled races became amalgamated, and were henceforth alike devoted to their country and its constitutional laws.

It was well for New Amazonia in the end that a good many Irish women had survived, for the arts of linen-making and lace-making, which they perpetuated and improved, are among the most valuable sources of revenue of the country.

Shortly after the Inaugurators were established in Dublin Castle a general election was called, and all the members of the Constitution were duly elected. These elections were to be triennial, none of the officials to be eligible for two successive Parliaments. The country was divided into two hundred and fifty districts, each of which elected its own Tribune, and paid for the maintenance of that Tribune during her term of office.

The salaries of the Leader, Prime Advisers, and Privy Councillors were fixed upon a progressive basis, and were payable by the State. The National Revenue was a question which required much anxious thought, but a solution of the problem was eventually arrived at, which was in course of time supplemented by the present existing arrangements.

The State was to be the only importer, no private competition being permitted. Hence the question of excise became a thing of the past.

The appointment of a great many officials to regulate the export and import trade was necessitated, and this at once gave employment to hundreds of receiving and exporting agents, who in their turn required the services of clerks.

All the goods which arrived in the country were paid for by the State, and transferred at a percentage of profit to wholesale merchants with capital enough to pay for large business transactions of this nature. Careful tariffs were drawn up, and the maximum of profit chargeable by the State upon all goods labeled as “Necessaries” was five per cent. “Luxuries,” however, all yielded twenty per cent. profit to the State.

From the hands of the wholesale merchant all goods were transferred to retail dealers, and by them placed within the reach of the people at large. In order to prevent the largest capitalists from absorbing the whole of the national trade, different branches were not permitted to be adopted by one merchant or retail dealer.

Thus no draper was allowed to sell groceries, furniture, ironmongery, stationery, or anything else which did not legitimately appertain to the drapery business, and other traders were restricted by similar regulations. By adopting this method the State prevented one or two firms from making huge fortunes at the expense of fifty less opulent traders, as was the case in Teuto-Scotland, where the system of compound establishments, syndicates, and corners prevailed to a disastrous extent.

At first the export traffic was not large, but was regulated in a similar manner to the import trade. The State was the ultimate receiver, and final vendor of all goods exported, a percentage of profit being exacted on all goods sent away.

As the trade of the country, stimulated by the energy and determination of its new inhabitants, steadily increased, the revenues derived by the State were enormous, and no other method of taxation was deemed necessary. We thus have, for the first time, the spectacle of a highly civilised country in which the tax-collector is non-existent.

As every sort of employment which presented itself had to be done by women, the question of a convenient working attire, which should at the same time be suitable, healthy, warm, and becoming, was soon brought up for discussion.

After much debate and strenuous opposition on the part of some advocates of changeable fashions, it was decided to adopt a national distinctive dress, the wearing of which should be compulsory. Latter day New Amazonians find it difficult to believe that the barbarous mode of dressing which had prevailed among the English, and later among the Teuto-Scots, was reluctantly abandoned by thousands of women, and that the New Amazonian National dress should have been strenuously objected to at first.

There is in the museum, at Garrettville, an instrument of torture on exhibition called a corset. Its extreme width is eighteen inches, and it is an almost incredible fact that this instrument once spanned the waist of a woman, who was only following one of the maddest and silliest fashions ever instituted, when she deliberately forced her ribs out of their proper places, and prepared an early grave for herself, in order that she might meet with the favour of some idiot of the other sex, who preferred fashion and doctor’s bills to health and happiness.

The children who came with their mothers to New Amazonia were housed in existing large buildings, until suitable erections for their reception could be designed and built. Their supervision and education was for a time entrusted to the mothers, subject to the directions of a trained staff of teachers.

Physical education was all that was aimed at until the child’s tenth birthday had been passed. The most careful attention was paid to diet, the necessary proportions of heat, flesh, and starch-formers being supplied to them, all cooked in such palatably scientific methods as conduced to build up a perfect system.

Swimming, running, dancing, drill, gymnastics, and every physical health-giving game in vogue constituted the curriculum of youngsters under ten. In the old country, thousands of little ones were pining from bodily lassitude and decay engendered by the brain work necessitated by a senseless system of cramming and examining. In New Amazonia the children entering school at the age of ten were splendidly robust; had a healthy, strong mind in a healthy, strong body, and were capable, without fatigue, of learning more in two years than their Teuto-Scottish contemporaries learned in all the seven years they had been compelled to attend school.

For six years the school course had to be pursued, then a choice of trade or profession adapted to the abilities of the student was made. The next four years were devoted to the learning of this trade, and the earnings of the next five years were appropriated by the State, which thus remunerated itself for the heavy expense of maintaining and educating each of its subjects under twenty years of age.

At the age of twenty-five each subject was at liberty to appropriate her earnings as she liked, but was also expected to provide her own board and residence henceforth.

As no men were admitted to any of the chief offices, some of them emigrated, but others were glad to remain, and adopted various trades which rendered them acceptable and useful members of the community. In course of time, a desire was manifested on the part of several couples to cast in their lot together, and it became necessary to pay some attention to the marriage laws, which, as they had existed in Teuto-Scotland, were totally rejected by New Amazonians as altogether obsolete, and stupidly conducive to crime and immorality. The marriage contract, under the new code of laws, became a purely civil one, dissolvable almost without cost, upon one or other of the parties to it proving incompatibility or unfaithfulness on the part of the other.

A document, received by each of the divorcees, legally entitled them to marry again, provided they fulfilled every other necessary condition. A medical certificate of soundness had to be procured before anyone was allowed to marry, as, above all, the State was determined to secure none but healthy subjects.

Sometimes very painful scenes were witnessed, for each new-born child was subjected to examination, and no crippled or malformed infants were permitted to live.

As all children were considered the property of the State, neither wife nor husband was responsible for their maintenance and education, and when a divorce was in prospect it was not necessary to take the offspring of the temporary union into consideration at all, though no divorces were permitted until after the birth of any expected result of such union. Nursing mothers were always welcomed with their children, and were maintained by the State, so long as the latter required their attendance.

There was, however, a determination on the part of the Government to guard against the evils of over-population in the future, and Malthusian doctrines were stringently enforced. Any woman or man becoming the parent of more than four children was punished for such recklessness by being treated as a criminal, and deprived of many very valuable civil rights.

It had often been the objection of legislators in the old country that Woman’s Suffrage would, in some never satisfactorily explained manner, cause an access of immorality in the land, seeing that immoral women would have as much right to vote as their more virtuous sisters. The stupidity and selfishness of such an argument is easily deducible from the fact that a large number of the male members themselves were men who led anything but moral lives.

Health of body, the highest technical and intellectual knowledge, and purity of morals has ever been the goal aimed at in New Amazonia, and it can to-day boast of being the most perfect, the most prosperous, and the most moral community in existence.

CHAPTER VII.

There existed many places of worship in the country, which were at first used indiscriminately by Catholics, Protestants, Jews, Wesleyans, Presbyterians, Quakers, and a host of other sects whose varied religious beliefs were so perplexing and confusing, and provocative of so many quarrels and discussions, that sectarianism was soon recognized as the rock upon which the nation was likely to founder, unless prompt legislation was brought to bear upon the situation.

Some believed in a Trinity of Gods, some in a Unity. Others looked forward to the coming of a Redeemer, others worshipped Jesus Christ, as the Redeemer of souls. Some denied a God altogether, and asserted that all the higher forms of life were the outcome of evolution. Others, again, worshipped a goddess called Humanity, and all were more or less in fear of a mythical Being to whom all the untold millions born into the world were supposed to be turned over for everlasting punishment in the event of their not having been fortunate enough to meet with all the requirements of creeds formulated by men.

Thus, one portion of the community had been taught that tiny babes, dying before they had been sprinkled with water by a priest, and had a certain formula of words uttered over them, would be consigned to everlasting perdition, and debarred from all the joys of a future life. Others would have been brought up to believe that all the untold millions of people who had, by force of circumstances, over which they had not the slightest control, never had Christianity preached to them, would also be delivered into the hands of Satan!

Could anything be more blasphemously opposed to the character of a merciful Creative Being, than to suppose it capable of producing myriads of human beings, simply that they might be consigned to never-ending torture such as only fiends could sanction?

Bigotry, Sectarianism, and Dogmatic Obstinacy had taken the place of a true and simple worship of the Creator. So rank did the strife become that certain sects actually maintained it to be wicked to enter a place of worship patronised by a rival sect. So truly religious were the majority of Christians that they only used the various churches as a means of advancing their temporal power, and statistics from all the world will prove that more lives have been lost, and more crimes committed, in the name of Religion, than from any other cause. Strange that what should be regarded as the greatest bond of unity upon earth should be so abused as to become one of its greatest powers for evil! Yet so it was when our forerunners peopled this land, and they were compelled to adopt stringent methods of grappling with the most serious evil in their midst.

The earth was too beautiful, and life itself was too great a mystery for the doctrine of a bounteous Creator to be entirely abandoned, so worship was offered, and temples dedicated, to the service of “The Giver of Life,” who was always pictured as loving and beneficent, and to whom no fearful qualities were attributed such as for ages made professing Christians live a life of fear lest they should really not be saved, and caused those who were taught to regard themselves as transgressors to die a death of horror and despair.

The doctrines preached henceforth were “Gratitude” to the “Giver of Life,” and the “Duty” to others of leading a pure and moral existence. A simple creed this, but one which all were ultimately able to adopt, and the worship of Morality never had any other effect upon the worship of “Life-Giver” than to render it all the more sincere and heartfelt.

All fear of a future state is banished from the minds of New Amazonians, who refuse to believe in a Prince of Darkness, and discard the doctrine of everlasting punishment entirely. A continuance of life hereafter is firmly believed in, the goal of bliss being supposed to be the ultimate perfection which will make the soul so glorious in knowledge and purity as to bring it near to “Life-Giver” herself, and enable it to revel in the supreme happiness afforded to all who have left ignorance and imperfection behind.

A priesthood was established after a time in New Amazonia, but was bereft of the especial privileges hitherto deemed inseparable from that holy office, but which were now regarded as the principal causes of the corruption, perversion of truth, and immorality which prevailed in the churches of Teuto-Scotland and other countries. No salary was attached to the office whatever, and thus religion was deprived of its chief means of abuse, for formerly disreputable persons who could command influence were not debarred from choosing the sacred office of priest, and from drawing the large profits which in many cases were derivable from their appointment.

In Teuto-Scotland the Church was simply regarded as an easy and lucrative profession. In New Amazonia it is an honour only bestowed upon capable people, who already possess a sufficient income to enable them to dispense with a further addition to it.

The doctrines they have to expound are simple, and their principal duty consists in providing Professors, each of high repute in their various professions, to lecture at different periods of that day, which is still, in accordance with ancient usage, set apart as the day of general cessation from ordinary toil.

Since it is not given one soul to be perfect in everything, and since the attempted study of everything would result in perfection in nothing, each individual hopes to become more speedily sure of final perfection by using all available means of improvement in what is at present the chief business of life, and by attending the lectures provided by the Guardian for the purpose of elucidating the most intricate technicalities of each trade and profession in existence.

The Lecturers are chosen by the State, and are all paid a uniform salary. As many places would be too small to repay for the domiciling of a complete staff of Lecturers in their midst, a system of travelling prevails, whereby the Lecturers travel from one place to another, so that each member of the community may have opportunities of attaining individual perfection by receiving public instruction in her or his special vocation.

All railways, water companies, and similar great undertakings are in the hands of the State, which receives all surplus profits, and pays its employés more liberally than private companies ever did in former days. A fixed percentage is always taken by the State. Should the proceeds be more than the State percentage, the surplus becomes the perquisite of the working staff, who thus receive a graduated addition to their income. Should bad work or bad management reduce the profits, the State still takes its fixed percentage, and it is thus made the individual interest of all persons employed by the State to do their best to promote the success of whatever department of State labour is entrusted to them.

The Teuto-Scots were guilty of many practices which are rigorously prohibited in New Amazonia. One of these was the use of the dried leaves of a plant called tobacco; by some it was put in the mouth, and the juice masticated out of it. By the majority of users it was slowly burnt, and the resulting smoke allowed to pass into the mouth, to be emitted immediately after in clouds of an unpleasant, choking nature. The practice is in many old works described as dirty and offensive; yet it is an undoubted fact that the discontinuance of the use of tobacco was so rebelled against, and so distasteful to many New Amazonian women, that frequent expulsions from the country took place before the custom was stamped out.

In all times there have been many vices attributed to the habit of imbibing fluids, which were so remarkable in their effects, that the users of them were deprived of both sense and motion, besides suffering bodily illness. It is the boast of New Amazonia that an intoxicant cannot be procured in the island, and that all existing establishments for the manufacture of these dangerous compounds were devoted to more noble uses.

The majority of Teuto-Scots were carnivorous, like dogs, cats, and birds of prey. Flesh eating is a habit which induces coarseness of mind and body, and robs both of the true beauty, and vigour furnished by a vegetable diet. That Life-Giver never intended the human animal to be carnivorous is proved by the anatomy of the human frame.

It is, however, probable that New Amazonia became a vegetarian nation in consequence of the repugnance or inability of the first women who came over from Teuto-Scotland to kill the animals from whose carcases the beef, pork, and mutton they had hitherto consumed was obtained. They probably found it a great deprivation to subsist without a large proportion of animal food at first, and it was for a time extensively imported. Vegetarian and Humanitarian doctrines were extensively preached, and in course of time, as the art of cookery was more carefully cultivated, the trade in meat carcases ceased entirely, to the ultimate permanent advantage of the nation, than which no finer race exists in the world at this moment.

It is on record that the ancients paid great attention to the diet and housing of the animals intended either for slaughter, for beasts of burden, or for the chase, and that they knew exactly what food would produce the most coveted results. Thus they would subject their animals to one kind of treatment calculated to produce fat, while a change of diet would be productive of lean flesh. Any other results aimed at would be treated with corresponding acumen.

They even were able to produce a cruel disease in geese, whereby their livers were inordinately enlarged. These diseased livers were used in the construction of certain pies called pâtés-de-fois-gras, which were consumed in large quantities by those who could afford the high prices charged for them.

And yet, incredible as it may seem, these people had scarcely the most elementary knowledge of the necessary means of preserving the lives of their children, and rearing them in a methodical or scientific manner. No restraints were placed upon the people relative to the number of their offspring, for thousands of children died daily through the ignorance and incapacity of those who were entrusted with the rearing of them, thus partially counteracting one evil by the infliction of another, incalculable suffering being the invariable accompaniment of such mal-administration of mundane affairs.

If the offspring of the Teuto-Scots attained maturity, they were the subjects of such miseries as make New Amazonians often wonder how they supported life’s burden. Their social pleasures were perpetually ruined by their inability to understand the signs of the weather until a tempest was upon them. Such a thing as altering the direction of a steady wind, and thereby producing either wet or fine weather, by means of a huge artificially created vacuum, had never been thought of. Neither had they attained the scientific knowledge which enables us to prevent disastrous thunderstorms by utilising all superfluous electricity, that would otherwise accumulate and work mischief.

So much was the life of the ancients dominated by the perpetual changes of weather in the British Islands, that it is said that no conversation ever took place in their day without some allusion to the weather being made in it.

Their lives were rendered unbearable by constant troubles which innumerable diseases wrought on their frames, and by the ever-recurring removal of some dear friend by death.

The advance of age was not looked for with delight and eagerness, as with us, for it brought with it an appalling train of evils. The body waxed feeble and bent. The eyes grew dim and often sightless. The senses of taste, smell, and hearing became impaired. The voice cracked, and made the speech harsh and shaky. The teeth fell out, after gradually and painfully decaying in the mouth. The gait became unsteady. The mind grew feeble, and the whole body was transformed into a pitiable spectacle of ruin and misery, soon to fall into the grave, unless one of the fell diseases to which these our ancestors were subjected swept them out of life long ere this.

Science was then in its infancy, and transfusion of blood was scouted as useless and impracticable, or many of the troubles of those days might have been avoided.

All these things were bad enough to endure, but when we remember that the greater part of the human race was led to expect nothing better after bodily death than a continuance of the spiritual ego in a state of horrible and never-ending torture, then indeed we may be thankful that we are free from so many of the ills to which it was then popularly believed all human flesh was heir.

CHAPTER VIII.

I closed the book which I had been perusing, with a sense of the liveliest amazement. Was it possible, I thought, that this wonderful people had really conquered disease, decay, death, and the elements?

The suggestion seemed so wild, and my surroundings altogether were so strange, that I pinched myself to make sure that I had not really left my earthly casing behind me, and emerged, Chrysalis-like, into another world, whereof the grovelling nature of my former existence had failed to give me any conception.

But no, I was as sensitive to pain as ever I had been; and, to make the situation once more one of active reality, Hilda presently made her re-appearance. It was well for me that she seemed to have taken a strong fancy to me, otherwise I should never have been able to feel so much at ease in her presence as I did.

True, she was not more than nineteen years of age, so she told me, and was still pursuing the studies which were to qualify her to become a full-blown Lecturer on Chemical Science, but her physique was so splendid, and her mental qualities of such surprising vigour for one so young as she, that it was impossible for me to regard myself other than as a very inferior being in her presence.

She was very pleased to find that I had been able to read the books she had placed at my disposal; but her powers of belief were severely taxed when I insisted that the retrospect, referring to the peculiar habits and customs of the Ancients, was a faithful picture of things as they still existed in my own country.

“To tell you the truth,” she said at last, “I think that you have been asleep for about six hundred years. You must have been taking Schlafstrank, though I had no idea it had been so long in existence.”

“And, pray, what is Schlafstrank, and what are its uses?” I asked, whereupon I was told that Schlafstrank was an essence, discovered in the year 2239, by Ada of Garretville, while Senior Lecturer in Chemistry for that year. The uses to which this essence was devoted was to put people to sleep for a longer or a shorter period of time, according to the quantity inhaled or swallowed. While under the influence of Schlafstrank any amount of pain could be borne without causing the subject of it any real inconvenience, since no sense of pain or bodily suffering was conveyed to the sleeping mind.

Thus if, in unusual exception to the rule of perfect health which prevailed here, some dangerous or painful disease overtook any of the children of the State, be they old or young, they were subject to the influence of Schlafstrank, and then dosed or operated upon until the disease was conquered. In this way did New Amazonians avoid suffering, and it struck me as marvellous to picture them as the subjects of an accident resulting in a few broken limbs, and being unconscious of any inconvenience arising therefrom during the processes of setting and recovery. I was told that Schlafstrank produced no deleterious effect upon the body, although repeated doses were given, if the patient’s mind threatened to awake before complete recovery of the body had set in.

One thing mystified me exceedingly. I was told that Schlafstrank was not invented until the year 2239, and naturally asked what year this was supposed to be. No doubt there was ample room for amusement on both sides when I positively averred that the year 1889 was not yet at an end, and Hilda insisted just as positively that this was the year 2472.

Not a little to my surprise, an attendant knocked at the door, and presented me with a parcel, with the words “From the Mother.”

“The Mother?”, I queried, and Hilda, pitying my ignorance, informed me that the State was the Mother of her people, and that no doubt the parcel contained a suitable outfit for me. On opening the parcel, I found the latter surmise to be correct, and I was eased of the last remnant of embarrassment I might have entertained at the idea of encroaching upon the hospitality of others, by being informed that it was considered a personal honour for any individual member of the State to be permitted to dispense the Mother’s hospitality to all comers.

No stranger was permitted to seek private hospitality, but was provided, at the behest and expense of the Mother, with everything necessary for comfort while in New Amazonia.

I suggested that if this were generally known, the country was in danger of being over-run by loafers and adventurers of all nations.

This argument was met by the information that no strangers were permitted to land except such as showed good reason for their advent. If, by any chance, a person obtained access to the country who was inclined to abuse its hospitality, she or he was subjected to a course of labour which more than sufficed to pay expenses, and was then promptly expelled, one of the numerous fleet of trading steamers which New Amazonia now possessed being used as a means of transport to the culprit’s own country.

Hilda’s duties were not quite completed, but she told me that if I would induct myself in my new garments during her absence, she would return to me as soon as possible, and that she was deputed to inform me that Principal Grey and Professor Wise were prepared to escort me on a tour round the city, if I cared to go.

Es geht ohne sagen that I jumped at the offer, metaphorically speaking, and that I exerted myself to the utmost to transform my outward semblance by wasting no time ere I changed my own attire for the National costume a bountiful State had placed at my disposal. I availed myself of a marble bath which Hilda had shown me, and even half resolved to sacrifice my hair, in my desire to make myself as less like an oddity as possible.

The clothes proved a good fit, if the term could be applied to garments whose chief beauty consisted in the absolute freedom from constraint which they exercised over the body. I noticed one omission, which I was inclined to regret. No graceful sash formed part of my outfit, and I learnt afterwards that none but natives of the soil, or formally adopted immigrants, were permitted to adorn themselves with this distinctive National badge.

I was very much relieved when, on the return of Hilda, she pronounced me to be so passable as to be sure to escape the annoyance of being conspicuously Ancient looking, my diminutive stature being now the only specially noticeable feature about me, provided my hair could be hidden. Upon trial, my new velvet cap proved too inadequate a means of securing the desired end, and, with something akin to a pang, I must confess, I empowered Hilda to deprive me of what I had hitherto been taught to regard as woman’s glory.

No sooner, however, was I bereft of all superabundant tresses, than I decided that the men who have from time to time so zealously exhorted women to wear their hair long, have done it from an innate conviction that the practice was debilitating and inconvenient, and therefore likely to prove an invaluable aid in the final subjugation of woman. Unlike Samson of old, I rejoiced in my newly acquired lack of hirsute adornment, and went on my way rejoicing.

I also found locomotion so much easier in my new attire, that the marble stairs had no terrors for me, and the interest I felt in all I saw proved a powerful incentive to exertion. I was not sorry to find that we were to be fortified with another meal before starting on our exploring expedition. As at the previous meal, there was no animal food, but the fare was scientifically perfect, and calculated to appeal powerfully to the senses by its appetising odour and appearance. Three meals per diem proved to be the rule here, and I observed that, compared to their physique, the appetites of the New Amazonians seemed to be very moderate. This was no doubt due to the fact that every item of food consumed was of such a nature that it at once supplied all the wants of the body, and that all indigestible or innutritive foods had long ago been banished from New Amazonian regimen as injurious on account of the useless waste of bodily force entailed in digesting or assimilating them.

I was, however, glad to find that tea was not condemned as entirely useless, and I thoroughly enjoyed this third and last meal of the day, after which I was taken out to explore posthumous Dublin, now called Andersonia. Once, when paying a flying visit to St. Petersburg, I was much struck by the large scale upon which all the principal streets and buildings were planned, and when I arrived in London, not very long after this, I felt positively relieved at the sight of the comparatively narrow and dingy London streets and buildings, and the sense of glare and unreality which made itself palpable in St. Petersburg promptly vanished in the atmosphere of London smoke.

Yellow-ochred palaces, lime-washed theatres, golden domes, and gaudy blue and white and gilt churches appealed less to my fancy than did the solid stone beauties of London architecture, grimy though they might be.

In looking upon Andersonia I was forcibly reminded of both the cities just mentioned. There were the same large, open squares, revealing broad, avenue-lined streets planned with mathematical exactitude, and the same huge buildings that I had noticed in St. Petersburg. But there was also the same solidity, freedom from glare, and honesty of composition, which roused my admiration when looking upon some of London’s magnificent stone buildings. Here, however, were examples of architecture such as I had never before seen the like of for magnificence, and it was no detriment to their beauty that they were unsullied by smoke or dirt.

This seemed a very large city, and must have contained a numerous population, yet not one smoking chimney did I see. The weather was delightfully mild, but of course heat was necessary for cooking. In my ideas, a fire was just as necessarily associated with smoke, and I expressed my surprise at its evident absence. Considerably to my astonishment, I had some difficulty in making myself understood, but, in the end, mutual enlightenment was the result of our confabulations.

Electricity was made so thoroughly subservient to human will that it supplied light, heat, and powers of volition, besides being made to perform nearly every conceivable domestic use. So well were the elements analysed and understood here that thunderstorms were unknown, and the force which yearly used to slay numbers of people was now attracted, cooped, and subjugated to human necessities.

NEW AMAZONIA:A FORETASTE OF THE FUTURE.

CONTENTS.

PROLOGUE.