Transcriber’s Notes
Obvious typographical errors have been silently corrected. Variations in hyphenation and accents have been standardised but all other spelling and punctuation remains unchanged.
The table of contents has been added for the reader's convenience.
Notes on music for the cantos included at the end of the play:
- The [original image] consists of 5 separate antiphons in medieval neumes notation. These have each been transcribed into modern notation image and audio files.
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The Canterbury Pilgrims
A COMEDY
The Canterbury Pilgrims
A COMEDY
BY
PERCY MACKAYE
THE TABARD INN
New York
THE MACMILLAN COMPANY
LONDON: MACMILLAN & CO., Ltd.
1909
All rights reserved
Copyright, 1903,
By THE MACMILLAN COMPANY.
Set up and electrotyped. Published March, 1903. Reprinted
September, 1908; September, 1909.
Norwood Press
J. S. Cushing Co.—Berwick & Smith Co.
Norwood, Mass., U.S.A.
To
C. A. Sothern
In Friendship
CONTENTS
| [DRAMATIS PERSONÆ] |
| [ACT FIRST] |
| [ACT SECOND] |
| [ACT THIRD] |
| [ACT FOURTH] |
“O KINDLY Muse! let not my weak tongue falter
In telling of this goodly company,
Of their old piety and of their glee;
But let a portion of ethereal dew
Fall on my head, and presently unmew
My soul; that I may dare, in wayfaring,
To stammer where old Chaucer used to sing.”
[Keats: Endymion.]
DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
1. Characters based on “The Canterbury Tales.”
MEN
| Geoffrey Chaucer, Poet at King Richard’s Court, and Knight of the Shire for Kent. | ||
| The Knight (Dan Roderigo d’Algezir). | ||
| The Squire (Aubrey), his son. | ||
| The Yeoman, his servant. | ||
| The Monk. | ||
| The Friar (Huberd). | ||
| The Merchant. | ||
| The Clerk. | ||
| The Man-of-Law. | ||
| The Franklin. | ||
| The Haberdasher, | } | Members of a Guild. |
| The Carpenter, | ||
| The Weaver, | ||
| The Dyer, | ||
| The Tapicer, | ||
| The Cook (Roger Hogge). | ||
| The Shipman (Jack). | ||
| The Doctor. | ||
| The Parson (Jankin). | ||
| The Ploughman. | ||
| The Miller (Bob or Robin). | ||
| The Manciple. | ||
| The Reeve. | ||
| The Summoner. | ||
| The Pardoner. | ||
| The Host (Herry Bailey). | ||
| The Canon’s Yeoman. | ||
| Joannes, | } | The Prioress’s Priests. |
| Marcus, | ||
| Paulus, | ||
WOMEN
- The Wife of Bath (Alisoun).
- The Prioress (Madame Eglantine).
- A Nun, her attendant.
- Mistress Bailey, of the Tabard Inn.
II. Characters not based on “The Canterbury Tales.”
MEN
- Richard II, King of England.
- John of Gaunt, Duke of Lancaster, uncle of the King, brother-in-law of Chaucer, and patron of Wycliffe.
- The Duke of Gloucester, his brother.
- De Vere, Duke of Ireland, Richard’s favourite.
- The Archbishop of Canterbury.
- John Wycliffe, the religious reformer, founder of the “Lollards.”
- Bottlejohn, Host of the One Nine-pin inn, at Bob-up-and-down.
- His Prentices (Ned and Dick).
- A Kitchen-boy.
- A Vender of Relics.
- Another Vender.
- A Black Friar.
- A Grey Friar.
- A Priest of Canterbury Cathedral.
- Heralds.
- Choir-boys.
WOMEN
- Johanna, Marchioness of Kent.
- Canterbury Brooch-girls.
- Serving-maids.
Note.—Those designated as Alisoun’s “Swains” are the Friar, Cook, Shipman, Miller, Manciple, Summoner, Pardoner.
ACT FIRST
“Bifel that, in that seson on a day,
In Southwerk at the Tabard as I lay
Redy to wenden on my pilgrimage
To Caunterbury, with ful devout corage,
At night was come into that hostelrye
Wel nyne and twenty in a companye
Of sondry folk, by aventure y-falle
In felawshipe, and pilgrims were they alle,
That toward Caunterbury wolden ryde.”
ACT I
Time: April 16th, 1387. Late afternoon.
Scene: The Tabard Inn at Southwark, near London.
When the scene opens, about half of the Pilgrims have arrived; the others come in during the first part of the act. Those already arrived are the Miller, Shipman, Cook, Parson, Ploughman, Franklin, Doctor, Friar, Haberdasher, Carpenter, Weaver, Dyer, Tapicer, Clerk, and Chaucer.
At rise of curtain, the Host is just moving to receive the Knight, Squire, and Yeoman at the door, back. Chaucer sits with a big volume on his knee in the corner by the fireplace, left; right front, the Miller and the Cook are wrestling, while those near look on.
COOK
Now, masters, see a miller eat bran!
MILLER
Corpus!
I’d liever wrastle with a butterfly.
SHIPMAN
Tackle him aft.
FRANKLIN
Grip, mon.
[They clutch each other.]
A SERVING-MAID
[Aside to Friar.]
A diamond pin?
FRIAR
[Lisps slightly.]
One of thy glances stickéd through my heart!
[Offers her the pin.]
SERVING-MAID
The Master is not looking now.
FRIAR
A bargain?
[Maid nods, takes the pin, and hurries off to serve at table. Friar follows.]
HOST
Welcome, Sir Knight!
KNIGHT
Is this the Tabard Inn?
HOST
[Points through the open door to his swinging sign.]
Lo yonder, sir, is Herry Bailey’s shirt
Flappeth in the wind; and this is Herry himself.
[Claps his hands for a serving-boy.]
Knave!
WEAVER
[Pounds on the table with a jug, while Carpenter tosses
dice.]
Ale, here! Ale!
[A shout from the pilgrims, front.]
MILLER
[Throwing the Cook.]
Down!
SHIPMAN
Jolly chuck!
COOK
[Getting to his feet with a bloody nose and fisting.]
’Sblood! Thou—
FRANKLIN
Hold, Master Cook, sith thou hast licked the platter,
Go now and wash the gravy off thy nose.
Look to him, doctor.
DOCTOR
Here!
FRANKLIN
[To the Miller.]
And thou shalt eat
A sop of wine with me. By God, thy hand!
PARSON
[To Ploughman, drawing him away.]
He sweareth like Sathanas. Come!
PLOUGHMAN
Toot, brother!
A little swearing saveth from the gallows.
MILLER
[Laughing at the Cook.]
His nose is like a tart.
CLERK
[To Chaucer, feasting his eyes on his book.]
Grant pardon, sir.
In vanitate humanorum rerum,
I’ the world’s uproar, ’tis sweet to find a scholar.
CHAUCER
A book’s a mistress all the world may love
And none be jilted.
CLERK
Then am I in love.
What is the book?
CHAUCER
A medley, like its master,
Containing many divers characters,
Bound in one hide. Whoso shall read it through
He shall behold Troilus and Launcelot
Sighing in Cæsar’s face, and Scaramouche
Painting with grins the back of Aristotle.
CLERK
[Sparkling.]
What!—Aristotle?
CHAUCER
[Rising, hands him the volume.]
I prithee look it through.
CLERK
Grammercy—somewhat farther from the piping.
[Draws farther away from the Squire, who is beginning to play a few strains on his flute, in front of the fire.]
MAN OF LAW
[Entering with Merchant.]
For this recognisance—
MERCHANT
The ship was wrecked.
MAN OF LAW
Depardieux! Then your property is flotsam
And liable to salvage. Therefore you
Will need me as your man-of-law.
KNIGHT
[To Chaucer.]
I knew
You were a soldier by your bearing, sir.
You were at Cressy?
CHAUCER
Nay, Sir Knight, I played
With tin swords then. Though I have often fought
At Frenchmen’s heels, I was but six years old
When our Black Edward won his spurs.
KNIGHT
Runs time
So swiftly?—One and forty years ago!
HOST
[To a serving-maid.]
Belive, wench!
FRIAR
[Stealing a kiss from her.]
In principio—
HOST
What’s here?
MAID
The gentle friar!
HOST
Gentle flower-de-luce!
[Makes after Friar, who dodges behind Mistress Bailey.]
MISTRESS BAILEY
[Shrewishly.]
Hold; goodman Herry! ’Tis a friend of mine.
[Host retires; Friar mocks him.]
KNIGHT
I am returning from the Holy Land
And go to pay my vows at Canterbury.
This is my son.
CHAUCER
Go you to Canterbury
As well, Sir Squire?
[The Squire, putting down his flute, sighs deeply.]
KNIGHT
My son, the gentleman
Accosts thee!
SQUIRE
Noble gentleman—Ah me!
[He turns away.]
CHAUCER
[Follows him.]
My dearest heart and best beloved foe,
Why liketh you to do me all this woe?
What have I done that grieveth you, or said,
Save that I love and serve you, high and low?
And whilst I live I will do ever so.
Wherefore, my sweet, do not that I be dead;
For good and fair and gentle as ye be,
It were great wonder if but that ye had
A thousand thousand servants, good and bad:
The most unworthiest servant—I am he!
SQUIRE
Sir, by my lady’s grace, you are a poet
And lover, like myself. We shall be brothers.
But pardon, sir, those verses are not yours.
Dan Chaucer wrote them. Ah, sir, know you Chaucer?
CHAUCER
Twelve stone of him!
SQUIRE
Would I did! Is he not
An amorous divinity? Looks he
Like pale Leander, or some ancient god?
CHAUCER
Sooth, he is like old Bacchus round the middle.
SQUIRE
How acts he when in love? What feathers wears he?
Doth he sigh oft? What lady doth he serve?
Oh!
[At a smile from Chaucer, he starts back and looks at him in awe; then hurries to the Knight. Chaucer walks among the pilgrims, talking with them severally.]
MILLER
[To Franklin.]
Ten gallon ale? God’s arms! I take thee.
MAN OF LAW
What’s
The wager?
FRANKLIN
Yonder door; this miller here
Shall break it, at a running, with his head.
The door is oak. The stakes ten gallon ale.
SHIPMAN
Ho, then, I bet the miller shall be drunk.
MERCHANT
What bet?
SHIPMAN
Twelve crown upon the miller.
MERCHANT
Done.
[At the door appears the Prioress, accompanied by a Nun and her three Priests, one of whom, Joannes, carries a little pup. The Host hurries up with a reverence.]
HOST
Welcome, my lady dear. Vouchsafe to enter
Poor Herry Bailey’s inn.
PRIORESS
Merci.
HOST
[To a serving-boy.]
Knave, show
My lady Prioress to the blue chamber
Where His Majesty, King Richard, slept.
PRIORESS
Joannes,
Mark, Paulus, stay! have you the little hound
Safe?
JOANNES
Yes, my lady.
PRIORESS
Carry him before,
But carefully.
MILLER
[To Yeoman.]
Here, nut-head, hold my hood.
YEOMAN
Wilt try bareheaded?
FRIAR
’Mass!
FRANKLIN
Ho, for a skull!
Miller, thou art as tough a knot as e’er
The Devil tied. By God, mine ale is spilled.
[The priests and Prioress have just reached the door, left front, which the Miller is preparing to ram.]
PLOUGHMAN
The door is locked.
JOANNES
But, sir, the Prioress—
SHIPMAN
Heigh! Clear the decks!
[The Miller, with clenched fists, and head doubled over, runs
for the door.]
YEOMAN
Harrow!
PARSON
Run, Robin.
GUILD-MEN
[Rise from their dice.]
Ho!
[With a crash, the Miller’s head strikes the door and splits it. At the shock, he rebounds against Joannes, and reaching to save himself from falling, seizes the puppy.]
MILLER
A twenty devils!
GUILD-MEN
[All but the Weaver, clambering over the table.]
Come on!
PLOUGHMAN
[To the Miller.]
What aileth thee?
MILLER
The priest hath bit my hand.
JOANNES
Sweet sir, the puppy—
It was the puppy, sir.
MILLER
Wring me its neck.
PRIORESS
Alas, Joannes—help!
MILLER
By Corpus bones!
Give me the cur.
PRIORESS
St. Loy! Will no one help?
CHAUCER
Madame, what may I do?
PRIORESS
My little hound—
The churl—My little hound! The churl will hurt it.
If you would fetch to me my little hound—
CHAUCER
Madame, I’d fetch you Cerberus from hell.
MILLER
Lo, masters! See a dog’s neck wrung!
CHAUCER
[Breaking through the crowd, seizes the Miller by the throat.]
Which dog’s?
MILLER
Leave go!—’Sdeath! Take the whelp, a devil’s name.
CHAUCER
Kneel! Ask grace of this lady here.
MILLER
[Sullenly.]
What lady?
CHAUCER
Of her whom gentles call St. Charity
In every place and time.—
[Turns then towards Prioress.]
What other name
This lady bears, I have not yet been honoured
With knowing.—Kneel!
MILLER
[Morosely; kneels.]
Lady, I axe your pardon.
CHAUCER
Madame, your little hound is safe.
PRIORESS
[Nestles the little hound with tender effusiveness; then turns shyly to Chaucer.]
Merci!
My name is Madame Eglantine.
[Hurries out, left.]
CHAUCER
[Aside.]
Hold, Geoffrey!
Yon beastie’s quaking side thumped not as thine
Thumps now. And wilt thou ape a little hound?
Ah, Madame Eglantine, unless ye be
To me, as well as him, St. Charity!
FRANKLIN
Who is the man?
MILLER
The Devil, by his eye.
They say King Richard hath to court a wrastler
Can grip ten men. I guess that he be him.
COOK
Ho! milksop of a miller!
MILLER
[Seizing him.]
Say it twice;
What?
COOK
Nay, thou art a bull at bucking doors.
FRANKLIN
Let ribs be hoops for twenty gallon ale
And stop your wind-bags. Come.
MILLER
[With a grin, follows the Franklin.]
By Corpus bones!
SHIPMAN
Twelve crown.
MERCHANT
Twelve, say you? See my man-of-law.
WEAVER
[Springs to his feet.]
The throw is mine!
DYER
A lie! When we were away
You changed the dice!
WEAVER
My throw was cinq and three.
DYER
A lie! Have it in your gullet!
[Draws his knife. They fight.]
CARPENTER
Part them!
TAPICER
Back!
HOST
Harrow! Dick Weaver, hold! Fie, Master Dyer,
Here’s not a dyeing stablishment; we want
No crimson cloth—Clap hands now: Knave, more ale.
CHAUCER
[To the Doctor.]
If then, as by hypothesis, this cook
Hath broke his nose, it follows first that we
Must calculate the ascendent of his image.
DOCTOR
Precisely! Pray proceed. I am fortunate
To have met a fellow-doctor at this inn.
CHAUCER
Next, treating him by magic natural,
Provide him well with old authorities,
As Esculapius, Diescorides,
Damascien, Constantinus, Averrois,
Hippocrates, Serapion, Razis,
Bernardus, Galienus, Gilbertinus—
DOCTOR
But, sir, the fellow cannot read—
CHAUCER
Why, true;
Then there remains but one sure remedy,
Thus: bid him, fasting, when the moon is wane,
And Venus rises in the house of Pisces,
To rub it nine times with a herring’s tail.
DOCTOR
Yea, Pisces is a fish.—I thank you, sir.
[He hurries off to the Cook, whose nose he has patched.]
HOST
[To the Reeve, who enters.]
God save thee, Osewold! What’s o’clock? Thou look’st
As puckered as a pear at Candlemas.
REEVE
There be too many folk i’ the world; and none
Is ripe till he be rotten.
[Sits at table.]
Penny’orth ale!
SQUIRE
My lord, father!
KNIGHT
Well, son?
SQUIRE
[Looking at Chaucer.]
Sir, saw you ever
So knightly, sweet, and sovereign a man,
With eyes so glad and shrewdly innocent?
O, when I laid my hand in his, and looked
Into his eyes, meseemed I rode on horse
Into the April open fields, and heard
The larks upsinging in the sun. Sir, have
You guessed who ’tis?
KNIGHT
To judge him by his speech,
Some valiant officer.
SQUIRE
Nay, I have guessed.
[A merry jingling of bells outside. Enter the Monk, holding
up a dead swan.]
MONK
Soft! Handle not the fat swan. Give it me.
Bailey, I’ll learn thy cook to turn a spit.
[Exit, right. Enter, left, Joannes.]
CHAUCER
[To Ploughman.]
Aye, man, but weather is the ploughman’s wife
To take for worse or better. If thy loam
Be thin, and little snow, which is the best
Manure, then thou must dung thy furrows twice
’Twixt Michelmas and March.
PLOUGHMAN
Aye, but but—
JOANNES
Sir Knight,
This letter....
CHAUCER
What! from whom?
PLOUGHMAN
Toot! Canst thou read, mon?
JOANNES
This letter, sir, my Lady Prioress—
CHAUCER
From Madame Eglantine? Waits she an answer?
JOANNES
So please you, sir.
CHAUCER
Sweet saints!
[Takes the letter and reads, aside.]
PLOUGHMAN
[Watches Chaucer curiously.]
Aye, ’e can read it.
[Outside, is heard the distant voice of the Wife of Bath (Alisoun), joined in chorus by the Pardoner, Manciple, and Summoner, singing.]
ALISOUN
When folk o’ Faerie
Are laughing in the laund,
And the nix pipes low in the miller’s pond,
Come hither, love, to me.
[Chorus.]
With doe and with dove,
Come back to your love.
Come hither, love, to me.
CHAUCER
[Reading the Prioress’s letter, as the song outside sounds nearer.]
“Monsieur l’inconnu Chevalier—
These greetings shall apprise you that the little hound is convalescent, and now suffereth from nothing save a sore necessity for nourishment. Wherefore, being cast in holy pilgrimage upon this revelous inn, I appeal once more, gentil monsieur, to your honourable chivalry, of which I beseech you this favour, to wit; that you shall see prepared and delivered into the hands of Joannes, my priest, a recipe as follows:—
One ounce of wastel-bread, toasted a pleasant brown;
One little cup of fresh milk;
Soak the former in the latter, till the sand-glass shall be run half out;
Then sprinkle sparingly with sweet root of beet, rubbed fine.
Serve neatly.
Madame Eglantine.”
SHIPMAN
[At the door, to Friar, who is starting to flirt with a third serving-maid.]
Hist! Who’s yon jolly Nancy riding here,
With them three tapsters tooting up behind?
FRIAR
By sweet St. Cuthbert!
SHIPMAN
Ha! ye ken the wench.
FRIAR
The wench? Oho! Thou sayest well. List, sir;
List, gentle Mariner! Thy wench hath been
A five times wedded and five hundred woo’d;
Hath rode alone to sweet Jerusalem
And back more oft than Dick-the-Lion’s-Heart;
And in her right ear she is deaf as stone,
Because, she saith, that once with her right ear
She listened to a lusty Saracen.
She was not born a-yesterday, yet, by
The merry mass, when she comes in the door,
She maketh sweet-sixteen as stale as dough.
SHIPMAN
She looks a jolly Malkin. What’s her name?
FRIAR
Dame Alisoun, a cloth-maker of Bath.
CHAUCER
[Reading.]
“P.S. Let not the under-side be toasted as brown as the upper.
P.P.S. The milk should not be skimmed.”
[Laughs to himself.]
“A little cup of milk and wastel-bread!”
Haha!—A gentle heroine for a tale!
My heart is lost.
[To Joannes, who is trembling at the Miller.]
What, fellow, art thou scared?
Come with me to the kitchen.
JOANNES
[Follows timidly.]
Ben’cite!
[Exeunt.]
[Outside the song, “Come hither, Love,” bursts into chorus. Enter the Wife of Bath, astride a small white ass, which is fancifully caparisoned like a fairy creature. Spurs jingle on the Wife’s boots, and on her head is a great round hat. Followed by the Summoner, Pardoner, and Manciple, she rides into the middle of the floor and reins up.]
ALISOUN
Whoa-oop!—God save this merry company!
[A commotion.]
By God, I ween ye ken not what I am:
I am the jolly elf-queen, and this is
My milk-white doe, whereon I ride as light
As Robin Good-boy on a bumble-bee;
[Indicating the ass’s ears.]
These be his wings.—
And lo—my retinue!
These here be choir-boys from Fairy-land.
Come, Pardoner, toot up my praise anon.
PARDONER AND ALISOUN [sing]
When sap runs in the tree,
And the huntsman sings “Halloo!”
And the greenwood saith: “Peewit! Cuckoo!”
Come hither, love, to me.
SWAINS AND ALISOUN
With turtle and plover,
Come back to your lover.
Come hither, love, to me.
ALISOUN
Now, lads, the chorus!
[The Swains and Alisoun, joined by several other pilgrims,
repeat chorus.]
MILLER
Nails and blood! Again!
FRIAR
Encore!
ALISOUN
Nay lads, the song hath dried my whistle.
The first that fetches me a merry jug
Shall kiss my lily-white hand.
[The Swains, with a shout, scramble to get ale of the tapster.]
SWAINS
Here, ale here! ale!
HOST
Slow, masters! Turtle wins the rabbit race.
MILLER
[Offers his tankard, tipsily.]
Give’s thy hand, girl.
ALISOUN
Thou art drunk! ’Tis empty.
MILLER
Well, ’tis a jug. Ye said “a merry jug.”
ALISOUN
Pardee! I’ll keep my word.
MILLER
[Grinning, raises his face to her.]
A kiss?
ALISOUN
A smack!
[Flings the tankard at his head.]
MILLER
[Dodging it.]
Harrow!
THE OTHER SWAINS
[Pell-mell.]
Here! here! Take mine!
FRIAR
Drink, sweet Queen Mab!
[Re-enter Chaucer and Joannes. Chaucer carries in his
hand a crock.]
ALISOUN
[To the Friar.]
What, Huberd, are ye there? Ye are too late,
All o’ ye! The elf-queen spies her Oberon.
[Wheeling the ass to confront Chaucer.]
By God, sir, you’re the figure of a man
For me.—Give me thy name.
CHAUCER
Your Majesty,
This is most sudden. Dare I hope you would
Have me bestow my humble name upon you?
ALISOUN
Make it a swap, mon. Mine is Alisoun,
And lads they ken me as the Wife of Bath!
CHAUCER
My name is Geoffrey. When the moon is full,
I am an elf and skip upon the green;
By my circumference fairy-rings are drawn,
And lasses ken me as the Elvish Knight.
SQUIRE
[Aside.]
Father, ’tis he—the poet laureate!
KNIGHT
Brother-in-law to John of Gaunt?
SQUIRE
The same.
SHIPMAN
[Offers his mug again.]
Take this, old girl.
ALISOUN
The devil take a tar.
[Snatches the crock from Chaucer’s hand.]
I’ll take a swig from Geoffrey’s.—Holy Virgin!
What pap is this here? Milk and wastel-bread?
CHAUCER
Nay, ’tis a kind of brew concocted from
The milky way, to nurse unmarried maids.
ALISOUN
[Hands it back quickly.]
Saints! None o’ that for me.
CHAUCER
[Aside to Joannes.]
Bear it to your mistress.
ALISOUN
[Aside.]
Mistress? Aha!—A woman in the case.
[Aloud.]
Give us your hand, Sir Knight o’ the Wastel-bread,
And help me light adown.—
What! Are ye afeared
To take me in your arms?
CHAUCER
Sweet Alisoun,
Thou art a vision of the ruddy Venus
Bright pommelled on the unspotted Pegasus,
And I am Ganymede, thy stable boy.
[He helps her to alight.]
ALISOUN
Well swung! What think ye of my jolly heft?
CHAUCER
Thou art a very dandelion seed
And I thy zephyr.
MILLER
[To the Swains.]
’Sblood! He steals our wench.
SQUIRE
[Approaching Chaucer diffidently, speaks under his breath.]
Great Master Chaucer.
CHAUCER
Hush! Speak not my name.
[Takes the Squire aside.]
ALISOUN
Halloa! what’s struck this jolly company?
Ye’re flat as stale ale. Master Summoner, what’s
The matter now? Ye should be glad at heart
To wear so merry a bonfire in your face.
SUMMONER
Was it for this I sang, “Come hither, Love”?
COOK
Aye, was it for this?
ALISOUN
What, Roger Hogge, yourself?
How long, bird, have you worn a gallows-warrant
Upon your nose?
[The others hoot.]
COOK
As long, Dame Alisoun,
As you have had a hogshead for a sweetheart.
ALISOUN
Geoffrey, ye mean? Ho! Are ye jealous there?
[To the Shipman.]
Jack, too, and hast a wife to home at Dartmouth?
Hark, lads! This Jealousy is but a ninny;
For though there be a nine-and-twenty stars,
Yet Jealousy stares only at the moon.
Lo! I myself have made a vow ’twixt here
And holy Thomas’ shrine to twig a husband;
But if I like this fellow Geoffrey, can’t
I like ye all? By God, give me your fists;
And I will tip ye a secret.
[Mysteriously.]
I am deef!
Ye ken all great folks have some great defect:
Cupid is blind and Alisoun is deef;
But Cupid—he can wink the t’other eye,
And Alis—she can ope the t’other ear.
FRIAR
Sweet Alis, which is deaf?
ALISOUN
I said, the t’other.
FRIAR
Nay, but which ear, the right or left?
ALISOUN
Love, if
Ye guess the right ye won’t be left: how’s that?
So, fellows, ye can knock at either door;
And while Tom standeth scraping the front mat,
By God then, Dick, go rap at the side porch;
The t’other door is locked; I say not which.
[Laughing and boxing their ears as they try, in turn, to whisper to her, she leads them to the ale-barrel, where they drink.]
FRIAR
Sweet brethren, drink with me to t’other ear!
ALISOUN
Here’s pot-luck to you all, lads!
PARDONER.
[Who has spread out his relics in another part of the room.]
Pardons! pardons!
Offer your nobles now; spoons, brooches, rings:
Radix malorum est cupiditas.
CHAUCER
[Aside to Squire.]
Pray, speak no word of who I am. I ride
To Canterbury now, to bid farewell
My kinsman, John of Gaunt. But on the road,
I travel here incognito.
SQUIRE
But, sir,
At least, beseech you, let me guard your person;
So mean an inn, such raw folk, must offend
King Richard’s royal poet.
CHAUCER
Not so, lad.
To live a king with kings, a clod with clods,
To be at heart a bird of every feather,
A fellow of the finch as well as the lark,
The equal of each, brother of every man:
That is to be a poet, and to blow
Apollo’s pipe with every breath you breathe.
Therefore, sweet boy, don’t label me again
In this good company.
SQUIRE
I will not, sir—
[Aside.]
A god! A very god!
PARDONER
Here’s relics! pardons!
Offer your nobles now; spoons, brooches, rings!
Lordings, step up! Pardons from Rome all hot.
[A crowd gathers round him.]
PARSON
[Lifting a relic.]
What’s this?
PARDONER
That, master, is the shoulder-bone
Of a sheep once slaughtered by a holy Jew.
Take heed, lordings, take heed! What man is here
That hath to home a well?
SEVERAL
I! I!
PARDONER
Pay heed!
Let any man take this same shoulder-bone
And chuck it in his well, and if he own
A cow, or calf, or ass, which hath the pox,
Take water from that well, and wash its tongue.
Presto! It shall be well again.
PLOUGHMAN
[To the Parson.]
By Mary,
I’ll try it on Mol.
PARDONER
Hark, lordings, what I say!
If also the goodman that owns the beasts
Shall, fasting, before cock-crow, drink three draughts
Of that same well, his store shall multiply.
PARSON
My word!
FRANKLIN
Nay, that’s worth while.
PARDONER
List what I say!
Also, if any wife shall boil a broth
Of this same bone, it healeth jealousy.
ALISOUN
Ho! give it me! And every fellow here
Shall suck the marrow-bone.
PARDONER
What will you offer?
ALISOUN
[Throws a kiss.]
That’s all ye get o’ me.
PARSON
I’ll give a florin.
PARDONER
Done, Master Parson. Listen, lordings, list!
This is a piece o’ the sail St. Peter had
When he walked on the sea; and lo! this cloth—
ALISOUN
A pillow-case!
PARDONER
This is the Virgin’s veil.
And in this crystal glass behold—
ALISOUN
Pig’s bones!
[Slaps Chaucer on the shoulder.]
What, Geoffrey lad! Which will ye liever kiss,
A dead saint’s bones, or a live lass—her lips?
[Enter, L., the Prioress.]
CHAUCER
Why, Alisoun, I say all flesh is grave-clothes,
And lips the flowers that blossom o’er our bones;
God planted ’em to bloom in laughter’s sunshine
And April kissing-showers.
[Laughing, he kisses Alisoun and faces the Prioress.]
St. Charity!
ALISOUN
Haha! That time I had thee on the rump.
[She calls the Friar aside, R.]
PRIORESS
[Starting to go.]
Je vous demande pardong, Monsieur.
CHAUCER
Madame,
Qu’est ce que je puis faire pour elle?
PRIORESS
Rien, rien.
CHAUCER
Madame, mais si vous saviez comme je meurs
De vous servir—
PRIORESS
You speak patois,
Monsieur; I studied French in Stratford-at-the-Bowe.
CHAUCER
Your accent is adorably—unique.
PRIORESS
[Is about to melt, but sees Alisoun.]
And you a gentilhomme—at least I thought so
Whenas you saved my little hound—Ah, sir!
CHAUCER
Adam was our first father: I’m her brother.
PRIORESS
You meant no more?
CHAUCER
Her brother and your servant,
Madame. And for the rest, I ride to Canterbury:
I will absolve me at St. Thomas’ shrine.
PRIORESS
[Eagerly.]
Go you to Canterbury?
CHAUCER
With the rest.
PRIORESS
Oh! I am glad—that is, I came to ask you.
Know you, Monsieur, where lies upon the way
A little thorp men call Bob-up-and-down?
CHAUCER
Right well—we pass it on the road.
PRIORESS
We do?
Merci.
[Going.]
MILLER
[Amid uproar, drinks to Alisoun.]
Lend me thy t’other ear.
[Startled, the Prioress returns to Chaucer. Behind them,
the Friar, at a sign from Alisoun, listens unobserved.]
PRIORESS
You see—
I expect to meet my brother on the road.
He is returning from the Holy Land;
I am to meet him at the One Nine-pin,
A tavern at Bob-up-and-down. But—
CHAUCER
But?
PRIORESS
I have not seen him since I was a child.
I have forgotten how he looks.
CHAUCER
He is
Returning from the Holy Land?
PRIORESS
And has
His son with him, for squire. He is a knight.
CHAUCER
[Aside, looking at the Knight and Squire.]
A son—his squire? Good Lord!
PRIORESS
And so, Monsieur,
I’m boldened by your courtesy to ask
Your help to find him at Bob-up-and-down,
Till which—your kind protection on the road.
[More uproar, R.]
CHAUCER
But—
PRIORESS
Have I asked too much?
CHAUCER
Madame, I am honoured.
[Hesitatingly.]
How, then, am I to recognise your brother?
PRIORESS
He wears a ring, on which is charactered
The letter “A,” and after, writ, in Latin,
The same inscription as is fashioned here
Upon my brooch. I may not take it off,
For I did promise him to wear it always.
But look, sir, here’s the motto. Can you read it?
[She extends her hand, from the bracelet of which dangles a
brooch. The Friar draws nearer.]
CHAUCER
I thank you.
[Reads.]
“Amor vincit omnia.”
[Looking at her.]
“Love conquers all.”
PRIORESS
C’est juste, Monsieur. Adieu!
[Exit, L.]
FRIAR
[Making off to Alisoun.]
Hist! “Amor vincit omnia,” Sweet Alis!
[After talking aside with Alisoun he goes to the Knight.]
CHAUCER
[Aside, looking at the Knight and Squire.]
A morning’s canter to Bob-up-and-down!
“Till which—my kind protection on the road.”
When last they met, she was a little child;
Besides, I will make verses for his son.
A morning’s canter—time, the month of April—
Place, Merry England—Why not Lord Protector
Geoffrey? Her brother! What’s a suit of armor?
Nay! “Amor vincit omnia.”
[Turns away.]
FRIAR
[To the Knight, whose finger-ring he examines.]
How quaint, sir!
A crownèd “A” and underneath a motto.
KNIGHT
Quite so.
FRIAR
Merci!
[Returns quickly to Alisoun.]
ALISOUN
Her brother—the One Nine-pin?
FRIAR
To-morrow.
ALISOUN
Good.
FRIAR
Sweet Alisoun—my pay?
ALISOUN
Saith holy Brother Huberd? Love’s reward
Is service.
[Aside, eyeing Chaucer, who passes her.]
Corpus Venus! What a figure!
I’ll woo him. Ay; but first to rid me of
These other fellows.
[To the Friar.]
Hist!
In Peggy’s stall—
Peggy’s my milk-white doe—in Peggy’s stall,
Thou’lt find another jolly beggar, waits
To dun me.
FRIAR
Ho! A rendezvous?
ALISOUN
A trysting.
Go, for my love, and play the wench for me,
And nab him by the ears until I come.
FRIAR
St. Cupid, I am game. In Peggy’s stall?
[Exit.]
[Alisoun whispers aside individually to the Shipman and Manciple, who exeunt at different doors.]
CARPENTER
Sack? Sack in the cellarage?
WEAVER
Come on, let’s tap it.
[Exeunt with a number of others.]
SUMMONER
[At table, trying to rise.]
Qu—questio quid juris?
COOK
Now he’s drunk
You’ll get no more from him but “hic, hac, hoc.”
ALISOUN