FACTS IN JINGLES

Winifred, age twelve, with her trained bird, Okikusan

FACTS IN JINGLES

By

WINIFRED SACKVILLE STONER, JR.

(Written Between the Ages of Five and Twelve)

INDIANAPOLIS
THE BOBBS-MERRILL COMPANY
PUBLISHERS

Copyright 1915
The Bobbs-Merrill Company

PRINTED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

PRESS OF
BRAUNWORTH & CO.
BOOK MANUFACTURERS
BROOKLYN, N. Y.

Dedicated
to
Miss Katharine O'Shea
of
Madison, Wisconsin

INTRODUCTION

These jingles were written by a child for children. The young author does not expect that any one will imagine they were intended to be a contribution to poetry or literature. They will be of interest to adults principally as an illustration of the way a child's mind views some of the every-day situations of life. Grown people will also be interested to see how easily a young child can put facts into the jingle form when freedom of expression is acquired early.

Those who have read Mrs. Stoner's Natural Education will recall that Winifred learned almost as a babe to use the typewriter. This helped her in her spelling and composition, so that she gained ease and freedom in expressing herself on any topic that she understood. She wrote out everything she learned so that she might the better get a grasp of it and remember it. And she found that when some kinds of facts were put together in a jingle they could be fixed with less effort and retained more securely than if they were learned in the ordinary way—by rote and without any method of organization.

Rhyme and rhythm seem to furnish to the young mind an easy and effective method of relating and expressing facts ordinarily dissociated from anything of interest to a child. As long as such facts are presented to the young in home and school, the jingle will prove of service to teachers and parents, and of interest and value to children. In addition, some of these jingles will delight the young merely because of their rhythmical quality, while others will afford amusement because of the humorous interpretation they put on many of the events that are daily experienced by children everywhere.

Any adult who may read these jingles should be informed that many of them were written when Winifred was hardly more than a babe. And all of them were dashed off without effort to achieve poetic merit. One characteristic that makes them of interest is their spontaneity. As an illustration of the readiness with which Winifred can construct a jingle, I may say that when she was twelve years of age, I happened one day to read her the following essay on Bones written by a pupil:

"Bones is the framework of the body. If I had no bones in me, I should not have so much shape as I have now. If I had no bones my brain, heart, lungs, and larger blood vessels would be lying around in me, and might get hurt. If my bones were burned I should be brittle, because it would take the animal out of me. If I was soaked in acid I should be limber. I'd rather be soaked than burned. Some of my bones don't grow close to my others snug like the branches to the trunk of a tree. The reason why they don't grow that way is because they have joints. Joints is good things to have in bones. All my bones put together make a skeleton. Some animals have their skeleton on the outside. I am glad I am not them animals, for my skeleton like it is on the chart would not look very well on my outside."

I asked her if she would put the essay into a rhyme. She ran off to her typewriter, and in twelve minutes came back with the jingle, I'm glad I'm not an Exo. It is published exactly as she handed it to me, without change in content or in form.

Mrs. Stoner's Natural Education describes in detail how Winifred has been educated up to this point in her career. This book of jingles presents some concrete evidence of the results of Mrs. Stoner's method of teaching freedom of expression, and her many devices for assisting a child to retain more or less formal facts in history, the sciences, and so on. The book will prove of interest and help to children, and parents and teachers should be able to get suggestions and practical teaching devices from it.

M. V. O'Shea.

Madison, Wisconsin.

Ever since I was five years old my dear friends, the fairies, have whispered jingles to me as keys to Memory's storehouse. As these jingles have been of great assistance in my studies, I have asked my good publishers to put them in book form with the hope that they may help, or at least amuse, many girls and boys.

Winifred Sackville Stoner, Jr.

CONTENTS

FACTS IN JINGLES

A GREAT SURPRISE

On the nineteenth day of August, in the year of nineteen two,

Most kind and gracious Madame Stork right over Norfolk flew,

And brought to my dear mother there a wonderful surprise,

A little red-brown baby girl with large blackberry eyes.

Now mother, she had asked the stork to bring her greatest joy

And drop a bundle at her door containing a wee boy;

But when the stork made a mistake and brought just little me,

She thought that I was better far than any boy could be,

And wrapped me in the blanket which she'd planned for my wee brother

And which my dear "Ma Mie" had knit to help my busy mother.

She changed the name of Lionel to little Winifred,

And all the things for brother planned, she gave to me instead.

BRIDGET MAKES SPLIT PEA SOUP

"Bridget," asked the mistress, "whatever is the matter,

Nothing ready for our lunch excepting pancake batter?

Why, I invited guests to come for lunch at half-past one,

And they've been waiting all this time and yet there's nothing done."

"Well, mum," replied Miss Bridget, "the fault is all your own,

For split pea soup you ordered and, workin' here alone,

It's took me just two hours while tryin' just to split

Three hundred of these blarsted peas, which give me most a fit,

And as there's still three hundred, 'twill take two hours more

To split the pesky little things, shure as me name's MAHORE!"

THE CAREFUL MOTHER

Now come, dear John, and go to school,

I hope you know your every rule.

No, do not kiss me, Johnnie dear,

My mouth is full of germs I fear.

Love, as you walk along the street,

You must not pat each dog you meet.

Alas! you naughty, careless lad,

You've touched the cat, how sad, how sad!

For I must sterilize again

Your hands and face and books and pen.

Now, take each antiseptic glove

And quickly into each one shove

Your fingers which are prone to be

From dreaded germs—ah, never free.

Here's "SURE-GERM-KILLER" in a case.

Put some at once on hands and face,

For, oh, I fear those dreadful GERMS

May some day make you food for worms!

GROWING THINGS

My dearest friend, John M—, and I, at least our mothers say,

Are growing just as weeds will grow in April and in May.

John's legs they grow so very fast his pants they leave his knees,

His jackets get so very tight they burst if he dare sneeze.

His head grows large and larger, I suppose because of brains,

So when he wears his last year's cap, it causes lots of pains.

And I am such a growing thing, my dresses they won't last

More than a month before the spot marked by my knees is passed.

And when I had the measles and had to stay in bed,

You scarcely can believe me, but I grew from foot to head.

So everyone who saw me said that I had grown an inch,

And when I tried to wear my shoes, oh, my, but they did pinch!

But generally my shoes don't last until they are too small,

Because I kick the toes right out while playing at football.

GRANDPA'S HEAD TUMS FREW HIS HAIR

When Margaret was a youngster scarcely two years old,

At climbing chairs and tables this lass was very bold.

And one day when her grandpa was seated in his chair,

She climbed upon the rounded rungs as if they were a stair,

And looking at her grandpa's head, which fast was growing bald,

She cried out, "Dearest Grandpa, one time you must hab failed,

Or maybe you've been naughty and dot an awful scare,

Which taused the top ob yu's round head to tum right frew de hair."

SUSAN REWARDED FOR TWENTY YEARS' SERVICE

Professor Theophilus Socrates Snook

One day paid a visit to Susan, his cook,

And, beaming upon her with kindliest look,

Said, "Susan, my dear, please gaze at this book.

In here you may learn of elephantiasis,

And also the hookworm, uncinariasis;

Of craw-craw and chiggers, of ainhum and sprue,

And all that I've written about them is true.

Now, Susan, to me you've been faithful, my dear,

In keeping my house for many a year;

For years nearly twenty you've been now with me,

Cooking my victuals just as they should be,

And truly I think a reward I should pay

To one who has labored from day unto day.

So when I discovered a wondrous new germ,

Which causes young children to wiggle and squirm,

I thought that this bug for you I would name

And bring you great glory and honor and fame.

It's a wondrous discovery, this ungomariasis,

And so we will call it the SUSANBONPIASIS."

"No, thank you, your honor," said Susan Bawben,

"I had the bugs once and don't want 'em again.

And if you onsist upon callin' me BUGS,

I'll lave you alone wid your books and your drugs."

A WONDROUS GROWING BABY

FIRST LADY:

"Just now I heard a story, which sister says is true,

About a lovely baby which grew and grew and grew,

Because its mother fed it on full gallons of good milk,

So that it gained ten pounds a day and looked as fine as silk."

SECOND LADY:

"I don't believe the story, such diet it would kill

A poor wee darling baby—at least, 'twould make it ill."

FIRST LADY:

"'Tis true, most little babies would have burst and died—

But not so with this baby—'Ma Elephant's fond pride.'"

A JOKE ON ONKLO KARLO

Onklo Karlo, he's a duck, and I love him dearly,

'Cause he loves all little girls, amusing them so queerly

By catching in his mouth the nuts which he hurls in the air,

And making paper cones to stand just almost anywhere;

Or holding apples on a pole stuck right upon his nose,

And balancing the little girls just straight upon his toes.

He always has good candy—the kind I love to eat—

Made of delicious goodies that taste so nice and sweet.

He tells most wondrous stories of sky and land and sea,

And never seems to weary of pleasing little me;

And jokes, he knows so many his store will ne'er give out,

They make me laugh and giggle and sometimes even shout;

But here's a joke on Onklo—I wonder if he knows

That nails are hidden in his socks—of course, they're on his toes.

THE PEARL OF LAKES

Of all good Uncle Sam's great lakes,

LAKE ERIE is the best;

She is a pearl among all lakes

Of north, south, east or west

Her waters on a pleasant day

Dance gaily in the sun,

And ever seem to smile at me

And say, "Come, have some fun

Within my cool refreshing spray

Of waters bright and clear,

Oh, little girl, come right away,

And never have a fear!

There are no dread sea monsters here

Within my wide domain,

Where only best of 'Finny-kind'

Are e'er allowed to reign."

My little friend, sweet Jean, and I

Say, "Thank you, gracious Lake,

Well don our bathing suits and caps

And then a plunge will take

Right into your fresh cooling fount,

And then we'll be so clean

That not a soul would ever think

That PITTSBURGH we had seen."

THE MUSEUM'S FAT LADY

TEACHER TO TOMMY:

"Now, Tommy, please answer, and tell me at once,

Who is your father, you silly young dunce?"

TOMMY TO TEACHER:

Said Tommy, with tears gushing forth from his eyes,

"I know you're a lady w'at's most wondrous wise,

But I hates like the mischief to tell on poor Pa,

'Cause he's always good to both me and Ma,

But he is the fat lady w'at you may see

By goin' to Barnum's and payin' a fee."

PATTI LOU AT THE ZOO

My little Cousin Patti Lou

One day went to the Highland Zoo,

And there she saw an old ZEBU

Who looked at her and said, "Moo—moo!"

And ended with an awful "Oooooooooh!"

She saw also a funny GNU,

And said to him, "Well, how are you?"

But he would nothing say or do,

Not even grant, nor bray, nor mew.

She saw a polly as it flew,

And showed gay feathers, pink and blue,

But when she came this bird to woo,

Poll bit her finger almost through.

Near to this wicked Polly Chew

There lived a handsome, large HIBOU,

Which came from some fine foreign zoo,

And worked its head round like a screw.

The camel and the kangaroo,

With polar bears and brown bears, too,

And many birds to me quite new,

All made their home in this great zoo.

With elephants and tigers, too,

And a huge lion named KING FOO,

He paced his cage and said, "Grr—roo!"

As if he meant, "I will eat you!"

Near him a dove all pink and blue

So sweetly sang of love, "Coo—coo,"

While across the way MONK SNOOPLE SNOO

Swung by his tail and sneezed "Ca—choo!"

FURS LINED WITH KITTENS

Said a rich little girl, who was boasting one day,

"I'ze too many furs, so I throws them away;"

But her poor little friend, who fine furs had none,

In braggadocia could not be outdone,

And proudly she showed her little fur mittens

And said, "I'ze sum odders, do deys lined wid kittens."

MUCH LEARNING SAVES IGNATIUS

"Father," said learned Ignatius, as the strap was preparing to fall

Down on his trousersless bare-skin, "I don't mind a whipping at all,

But are you quite certain, dear father, the strap has been well sterilized?

For virulent germs in old leather are often concealed and disguised;

And surely by violent impact with textile and soft porous skin,

But lately exposed to the street's dust there's danger of entering in

Upon my most delicate system, and then comes the big doctor's fee,

So, dear father, show you're a wise man and touch not the strap upon me."

While the learned youth plead, lo! his father upon that dread strap loosed his hold,

And thus he escaped from a whipping, Ignatius the wise and the bold.

TWILIGHT

Of all the hours of day or night

Give me the twilight hour,

When little birds hide out of sight

And every sylvan bower

Is filled with their sweet good night song,

While darkness creeps apace

O'er all the bright blue sky along

And hides the sun's gold face.

That is the hour when Mother dear

Says, "Come, sweetheart," to me,

"And of the earth's great heroes hear

While sitting on my knee."

Upon her arm I rest my hand

And wondrous stories hear,

Until it's time to go to bed,

Tucked in by Mother dear.

A FIVE-FOOT SHELF OF SUMMER BOOKS

Whenever you're perspiring like a Gruyère cheese,

List to this list of cooling works which cannot fail to please:

Great Isaac Hayes's noted work upon the POLAR SEA,

How much with him this broiling day we all would like to be!

Or maybe in the SNOWBOUND realms we'd find still more delight

If Whittier, the poet great, would take us there to-night.

With Nansen in his tales of weird and far-off frozen lands,

Where no one needs be tortured by electric buzzing fans;

And Barrows' wondrous voyages in icy ARCTIC REGIONS,

Meeting monstrous icebergs each hour by the legions.

While each and all would love to get a nice big cooling box

Of the ARCTIC SUNBEAMS that are mentioned by S. Cox,

And ICY LANDS by Perry, Kane, Atkinson and Hall,

Sound so mighty tempting to us one and all.

Exploring parties to the North led by the hero Schley,

Oh, such a summer voyage how we would like to try!

And follow after Wrangell with snow up to our knees

Across Siberia's lonely plains to far-off NORTHERN SEAS.

While reading of the ICE FLOATS from Kennan and from Hohn,