THE COUNT AND THE GIRL OF THE STREETS

It is morning toward six o’clock. A poorly furnished room with one window. The dirty yellowish blinds are down. Tattered, greenish curtains. On the dresser are several photographs, and beside them a cheap woman’s hat of conspicuously bad taste. Behind the mirror are cheap Japanese fans. On the table over which is drawn a reddish cover is an oil-lamp. It is burning low with a disagreeable odor, and has a shade of yellow paper. Beside it is a pitcher with remains of beer, and a half-empty glass.—On the floor beside the bed a woman’s clothes are lying in disorder. They look as though they had just been quickly thrown off. The Girl lies sleeping in the bed, breathing quietly. The Count is lying on the sofa fully dressed with his light overcoat on. His hat lies on the floor at the head of the sofa.

Count

(Stirs, rubs his eyes, sits up suddenly, remains seated, and looks around) Where am I?… Oh, yes … I actually went home with the woman, it seems… (He rises quickly, notices her bed) Oh, there she is… Queer, what sort of things can happen, even at my age. I haven’t the faintest notion, did they carry me up here? No… I remember—coming into the room… I was still awake then, or waked up … or … or maybe it’s only the room that reminds of something?… ’Pon my soul, yes, of course … it was yesterday I saw it… (Looks at his watch) What! yesterday, a couple of hours ago!—But, I knew, that something had to happen… I felt it in my bones … when I began to drink yesterday, I felt that … and what has happened?… Nothing… Or did there…? ’Pon my soul … for … for ten years it hasn’t happened to me that I don’t know… Well, let’s be honest at any rate, I was drunk… If I only knew since when… I remember perfectly when Bobby and I went into the all-night café, and … no, no… We left together … and then on the way… Yes, that’s it, Bobby and I rode in my carriage… But, why do I worry my brains about it? It doesn’t really matter. Let’s see that we get out of here. (Rises. The lamp shakes) Oh! (Looks at the sleeping Girl) Well, she sleeps the sleep of the just. I don’t remember anything—but I’ll put the money on the table … and then, good-by… (He stands in front of her, and looks at her for a considerable time) If I didn’t know what she is! (Studies her) I’ve known many who didn’t look as virtuous even in their sleep. ’Pon my soul… Bobby would say again, I’m philosophizing, but the truth is, sleep makes all equal, so it seems to me—like its brother, death… Hm, I should like to know, whether… No, I’d remember that… No, no, I dropped like a log on the sofa right away … and nothing happened… It is unbelievable how much alike all women sometimes look… Well, let’s go (He is about to go) Oh, of course.

(He takes his wallet, and is about to take out a banknote)

Girl

(Awakening) Well … who’s there so early in the morning—? (Recognizing him) Good morning, sonny!

Count

Good morning. Have a good sleep?

Girl

(Stretching) Oh, come here. Give me a little kiss.

Count

(Bends down to her, considers, and draws back) I was just going…

Girl

Going?

Count

It’s really about time.

Girl

You want to go away?

Count

(Half-embarrassed) Well…

Girl

Well, good-by, you’ll come some other time.

Count

Yes, good-by. But, won’t you give me your hand?

Girl

(Reaches out her hand from under the cover)

Count

(Takes her hand, and kisses it mechanically, and becoming aware of it, he smiles) Just as with a princess. Besides, if one only…

Girl

Why do you look at me that way?

Count

If one only sees the head, as now … anyway, each and every one looks innocent when she first awakes … ’pon my soul, one might imagine almost anything, if the kerosene didn’t smell so…

Girl

Yes, the lamps are always a nuisance.

Count

How old are you really?

Girl

Well, what would you guess?

Count

Twenty-four.

Girl

Oh, of course!

Count

Older?

Girl

I’m not yet twenty.

Count

And how long have you been…

Girl

A year.

Count

You began early.

Girl

Better too early, than too late.

Count

(Sits down upon her bed) Tell me, are you really happy?

Girl

Am I, what?

Count

I mean, are things going well with you?

Girl

Oh, things always go well with me.

Count

Yes… Well, did it never occur to you that you might become something else?

Girl

What might I become?

Count

Well… You are a very pretty girl. You might take a lover, for example.

Girl

Do you imagine I haven’t any?

Count

Yes, I know that—But I mean just one single one, who would take care of you, so that you wouldn’t have to go with everybody.

Girl

I don’t go with everybody. Thank heaven, I don’t have to. I pick those I want.

Count

(Looks around the room)

Girl

(Noticing it) We move downtown next month, to the Spiegelgasse.

Count

We? Who?

Girl

Well, the Madam, and the couple of other girls who live here.

Count

There are others—

Girl

Next door … don’t you hear?… that is Milly. She was in the café too.

Count

I hear some one snoring.

Girl

That’s Milly. She will snore the whole day long until ten o’clock to-night. Then she gets up, and goes to the café.

Count

What an awful life!

Girl

Of course it is. It annoys the Madam a lot. I’m always on the streets by noon.

Count

What do you do on the streets at noon?

Girl

What do you suppose I do? I’m going on my beat then.

Count

Oh, yes … of course… (Rises, takes out his wallet, and puts a banknote on the table) Good-by!

Girl

Going already… Good-by… Call again soon.

(Turns on her side)

Count

(Stands still) Tell me, is everything a matter of indifference to you already?

Girl

What?

Count

I mean, don’t you get pleasure out of anything any more?

Girl

(Yawning) I want to sleep.

Count

It’s all the same to you whether he is young or old or whether he…

Girl

Why do you ask?

Count

… Well (Suddenly hitting upon a thought) ’pon my soul, now I know of whom you remind me, it’s…

Girl

Do I look like some one?

Count

Unbelievable, unbelievable. Now please, don’t talk, at least not for a minute… (Looking at her) The very same features. (He kisses her suddenly on the eyes), the very image.

Girl

Well…

Count

’Pon my soul, it’s too bad that you … aren’t something different… You could make your fortune!

Girl

You talk just like Frank.

Count

Who is Frank?

Girl

The waiter in our café.

Count

In what way am I just like Frank?

Girl

He is also always telling me I might make my fortune, and wanting me to marry him.

Count

Why don’t you?

Girl

No thank you… I don’t want to marry, no, not for any price… Later on, perhaps.

Count

The eyes … the very same eyes… Bobby would surely call me a fool.—But I must kiss your eyes once more … so … and now God bless you, now I must go.

Girl

Good-by…

Count

(At the door) Tell me … aren’t you a bit surprised?…

Girl

At what?

Count

That I don’t want anything of you.

Girl

There are many men who aren’t in the mood in the morning.

Count

Of course… (To himself) Absurd, that I expect to be surprised… Well, good-by… (He is near the door) But really, I’m disappointed. I ought to know that women like her care only about money … what am I saying … it is beautiful, that at least she doesn’t pretend; should make one glad… (Aloud) Do you know, I shall come to see you again soon?

Girl

(With closed eyes) All right.

Count

When are you at home?

Girl

I’m always at home. You only have to ask for Leocadia.

Count

Leocadia… All right—Well, God bless you. (At the door) The wine is still in my head. But after all it is sublime… I am with a woman like her and haven’t done anything but kiss her eyes, because she reminded me of some one… (Turns toward her) Tell me, Leocadia, does it often happen that any one leaves you in this way?

Girl

What way?

Count

As I do.

Girl

In the morning?

Count

No … have you ever had any one with you,—who didn’t want anything of you?

Girl

No, that has never happened to me.

Count

Well, what do you think then? Do you think I didn’t like you?

Girl

Why shouldn’t you like me? You liked me well enough by night.

Count

I like you now, too.

Girl

But you liked me better last night.

Count

What makes you think that?

Girl

Why ask such foolish questions?

Count

Last night … well, tell me, didn’t I drop right down on the sofa?

Girl

Certainly … with me.

Count

With you?

Girl

Yes, don’t you remember?

Count

I did … both of us…

Girl

But you fell asleep right away.

Count

Right away… So … that’s what happened?…

Girl

Yes, sonny. But you must have been terribly drunk, that you don’t remember.

Count

So… And yet … there is a faint resemblance… Good-by… (Listens) … What is the matter?

Girl

The servant is up. Give her a tip as you go out. The outside door is open, so you won’t have to give anything to the janitor.

Count

(In the anteroom) Well… It would have been beautiful, if I had kissed her only on the eyes. It would have been almost an adventure… But it wasn’t my destiny. (The servant opens the door) Ah—here… Good-night.—

Servant

Good morning!

Count

Of course … good morning … good morning.