VI.
As Alice and the Hatter walked along they passed many curious things, such as Wolves in Sheep’s Clothing, the skin of a Tiger nailed to a barn door, St. George and the Dragon, Father Knickerbocker, barrels of political mud, a huge [p 113] />]serpent labeled “Anarchy,” a drug store window full of bottles of Political Dope and boxes of Political Pills, an orchard of Political Plum Trees, and other objects which the Hatter said were as old as the hills. “I’m afraid there’s nothing to hold us here,” he declared.
Alice’s attention was suddenly attracted by a little girl in a thin and ragged dress who, with an empty basket on her arm, was gazing wistfully at the goodies in a bakeshop window.
“She represents Poverty,” said the Hatter. “When she isn’t staring at a bakeshop she’s looking at a proclamation by the ice trust, or something like that.”
Alice spoke to the child and learned that she was one of a large family. Her father, she said, was a New York cartoonist who one day had been visited by an Original Idea.
“Where is he?” cried the Hatter excitedly.
“He dropped dead!” replied the child, weeping bitterly.
“Good night!” said the Hatter, and walked away.
[p 115]
]A LINE-O’-TYPE OR TWO
Quicquid agunt homines nostri est farrago libelli.
—Juvenal.
Question:
Who is this Juvenal wheezer?
Readers inquire every day.
Give us a line on the geezer—
What is he trying to say?
Do you expect us to get stuff
That is clear over our bean?
What is that “Quicquid, et cet.” stuff?
What does the gibberish mean?
Reply:
If you’re too lazy to look for
Juvenal’s name in the Dic,
Why should I go to the book for
Such a cantankerous kick?
Still, to avoid all dissension,
And my good nature to prove,
I am quite willing to mention
One or two things about Juve.
Juve was a Roman humdinger,
Writer of satires and sich.
He was consid’rable stinger—
Rare were his sallies and rich.
[p 116]
]High his poetic position,
Lofty his manner and brow;
Lived in the time of Domitian;—
That’s all I think of just now.
As for that “Quicquid, and so forth,”
I have but space to advise
If you’d decipher it go forth,
Look in the Dic and be wise.
Make it a point, in your reading,
Always to look up what’s new.
That is a simple proceeding:
Why not adopt it? I do.