THERE WAS A PAIR OF THEM
A private of a well-known regiment, who was always wanting leave on some excuse or other, applied at the orderly room and asked his commanding officer if he might have a few days’ leave, as his wife was ill and had sent him a letter asking him to come at once.
But his commanding officer, getting tired of his always wanting leave, said: “This is strange, Private Cheek, as only this morning I received a letter from your wife, saying she did not want you to see her any more, so hoped I would not grant you leave.”
Private Cheek—“Then I suppose I can’t have leave, sir?”
Commanding Officer—“No, you cannot.”
Private Cheek (turns as he gets to the door)—“Sir, may I compliment you?”
Commanding Officer—“Yes, certainly; on what?”
Private Cheek—“In having two such lovely liars in the regiment, because I’m not married at all.”