A Correct Letter to a Prospective Father-in-Law Who Is a Business Man
My letter,
10-6-22
Your letter,
In reply please refer to: ————
File—Love—personal—
N. Y.—1922
No. G, 16 19
Mr. Harrison Williams,
Vice-Pres. Kinnear-Williams Mfg. Co.,
Buffalo, N. Y.
DEAR SIR:
Confirming verbal message of even date re: being in love with
your daughter, this is to advise that I am in love with your
daughter. Any favorable action which you would care to take in
this matter would be greatly appreciated.
Yours truly,
EDWARD FISH.
Copy to your Daughter per E. F.
“ “ “ Wife
EF/F
Or, should the girl’s father be prominent in the advertising business, the following would probably create a favorable impression, especially if printed on a blotter or other useful article:
A Correct Letter to a Prospective Father-in-Law Who Is in the Advertising Business
JUST A MOMENT!
Have you ever stopped to consider the problem of grandchildren?
Do you know, for example, that ONLY 58% of the fathers in America
are GRANDFATHERS?
Did it ever occur to you that only 39% of the grandfathers in
America EVER HAVE GRANDCHILDREN?
Honestly, now, don’t there come moments, after the day’s work is
done and you are sitting in your slippers before the fire, when
you would give any thing in the world for a soft little voice to
call you GRANDPA?
Be fair to your daughter
Give her a College educated husband! COMPLIMENTS OF EDWARD FISH
Perhaps, if the old gentleman is employed in the Credit Department of Brooks Brothers, Frank Brothers, or any one of the better class stores, the following might prove effective:
A Correct Letter to a Prospective Father-in-Law Who Is Employed in a Credit Department
MY DEAR MR. ROBERTS: 10-6-22
I am writing you in regard to a little matter of matrimony which
no doubt you have overlooked in the press of business elsewhere.
This is not to be considered as a “dun” but merely as a gentle
reminder of the fact that it would be extremely agreeable if you
could see fit to let me marry your daughter before the first of
next month. I feel sure that you will give this matter your
immediate attention.
Yours truly,
ED. FISH.
11-2-22
DEAR MR. ROBERTS:
As you have not as yet replied to my communication of 10-6-22
regarding marriage to your daughter, I presume that you were not
at the time disposed to take care of the matter to which I
referred. I feel sure that upon consideration you will agree that
my terms are exceedingly liberal and I must therefore request
that you let me have some word from you before the first of next
month.
Yours truly,
EDWARD FISH.
(Registered Mail) 12-2-22
DEAR SIR:
You have not as yet replied to my communication of 10-6-22 and
11-2-22. I should regret exceedingly being forced to place this
matter in the hands of my attorneys, Messrs. Goldstein and
Nusselmann, 41 City Nat’l Bank Bldg.
E. FISH.
Of course, it would never do to carry this series to its conclusion and if no reply is received to this last letter it might be well to call on the gentleman in his place of business—or, possibly, it might even be better to call off the engagement. “None but the brave deserve the fair”—but there is also a line in one of Byron’s poems which goes, I believe, “Here sleep the brave.”