Faulty Social Training.
That society is bad whose members, however tenacious they be of forms of etiquette and elaborate ceremonials, have one code of manners for those whom they deem their equals, and another for those whom they esteem to be of less importance to them by reason of age, pecuniary condition, or relative social influence, writes Mrs. Sherwood. Bad manners are apt to prove the concomitant of a mind and disposition that are none too good, and the woman who slights and wounds people because they cannot minister to her ambitions, challenges criticism of her own shortcomings. A girl who is impertinent or careless in her demeanor to her mother or her mother’s friends; who talks slang; who is careless in her bearing toward young men; who accepts the attentions of a man of bad character or dissipated habits; who is loud in dress or manner—such a girl must be classed as ill-bred and undesirable in good society.
So with a young man who is indifferent to his elders, neglects to acknowledge invitations, sits while a lady stands, does not speak to his host; who is selfish, immoral and careless of his reputation. No matter how rich, or how agreeable to those he may wish to please, he is to be avoided by a wise host or hostess.
If a young girl comes from a secluded circle, and sees some handsome, well dressed woman much courted, and observes in her what seems to be insolent pretence, unkindness, frivolity, and superciliousness, let her inquire and wait before she accepts her acquaintance. Good society is the bringing together of the best men and women in a pleasant and proper way. Good breeding, personal superiority, beauty, genius, culture, are all estimable things, and every one likes a person of charming manners; but the best society is that of those who have virtue and good manners combined.