The Etiquette of Correspondence.
Good or ill-breeding is no more marked in general deportment than in the writing of notes and letters. A gracefully and courteously worded note is always pleasantly received. Very long letters are now rendered unnecessary by the increase of mail and telegraphic facilities, but the writing of notes has correspondingly increased; and the last few years have seen a profuse introduction of crests, ciphers, designs, and monograms in the corners of ordinary note-paper. The use of sealing-wax has almost been abandoned, although it is still the only elegant, formal, and ceremonious way acknowledged in England, of sealing a letter.
Colored note-paper fell into disuse long ago, and for the last few years we have not seen the heavy tints. Pale greens, grays, blues, and lilacs have found a place in fashionable stationery, but now no color that is appreciable is considered stylish, unless it be écru, a creamy white. Fanciful emblazoned and colored monograms have been dropped; the crest and cipher are laid aside, and ladies have simply the address of their city residence, or the name of their country place printed in one corner (generally in color), or, a fac-simile of their initials, engraved and set across the corner of the note-paper. The day of the week, also copied from their own handwriting, is often impressed upon the square cards now so much in use for short notes, or on the note-paper. Good, plain, thick, English note-paper, folded square, put in a square envelope, and sealed with red sealing-wax is always stylish in any part of the world.
The plan of having all the note-paper marked with the address is an excellent one. It gives a stylish finish to the appearance of the note-paper, is simple, and useful. The ink should be plain black ink, which gives the written characters great distinctness.
Every lady should study to acquire a free, and educated hand; a cramped, poor, slovenly, unformed handwriting is sure to produce a poor impression upon the reader.
Custom demands that we begin all notes in the first person, with the formula of “My dear Mrs. Brown,” and close with “Yours, cordially,” or “Yours with much regard,” etc. The laws of etiquette do not permit us to use numerals, as 3, 4, 5, but demand that we write out three, four, five. No abbreviations are allowed in a note to a friend, as, “Sd be glad to see you;” one must write out, “I should be glad to see you.” The date should follow the signing of the name. A note in answer to an invitation should be written in the third person, if the invitation be in the third person. An acceptance of a dinner invitation must be written in this form:
Mr. and Mrs. Green
have great pleasure in accepting the polite
invitation of
Mr. and Mrs. Dinsmore
for dinner, on the seventeenth inst., at seven
o’clock.
18 Golden Square.
July sixth.
Above all things, in letter writing, spell correctly. A word badly spelled stands out like a blot on a familiar or ceremonious note. Do not send a blurred, blotted, slovenly note to any one. The fashion is not now, as once, imperative that a margin be left around the edge of the paper. People now write all over the paper. Do not cross your letters: such letters are a nuisance to all people who have not the keenest of eyes.
No letter or note should be written on ruled paper. Every person should learn to write without lines. The square cards are much used, and are quite large enough for the transmission of all that a lady ordinarily wishes to say in giving or accepting an invitation. The day of the week and the address are often printed on the card. Square envelopes have also driven the long ones from the table of the elegant note-writer, and the custom of closing all ceremonious notes with sealing-wax is still adhered to by the most fastidious. Dates and numerical designations, such as the number of a house, may be written in Arabic figures, but quantities should be expressed in words. Few abbreviations are respectful. A married lady should always be addressed with the prefix of her husband’s Christian name. In this country, it is the custom to abbreviate everything except the title of “Reverend,” which we always give to the clergy. A properly written note honors the writer and the person to whom it is written, while a careless one may injure both.