THE DIGNIFIED MAN.
It iz often the kase that the dignified man iz nothing more than an owl amung humans.
He dont alwus kno but little, but when he duz he haz tew be kareful ov that little and look wize even if he dont prove tew be so.
One good hoss laff would spile him for life; if he lets go ov hiz dignity, hiz kapital iz all gone and he iz ruined forever.
The dignified man that i am talking about, never takes enny chances, he weighs every word before it iz uttered, and meazzures every ackshun before it iz expressed, and iz generally az free from blunders, or hits, az a tud stool iz. If he ever duz kik up and frolik he iz like the elastik elephant, and gay and kussid like the hippopotamus or wild sea hoss.
Dignity iz often substituted for wisdum, and iz quite often mistaken for it, but thare iz az mutch diffrence between them az thare iz between a puter 10 cent piece and a genuine haff dollar.
I decided long ago not tew giv enny man kredit for being wize, just bekauze he wouldn’t bend hiz back or laff when he had a right tew be tickled.
Sum ov the most suckcessfull phools i hav ever met were as grave az a kut stone, and most all the truly wize that i hav had the honor tew be introduced to, were alwuss a hunting for a good place tew roll on the grass.
Extreme gravity, in mi lexicon, stands for an extreme phool.