CHAPTER XXXII—SURRENDER AND INDEMNITY
Gee whiz, we reminded ourselves of General Pershing coming home. Just before we drove into the parade ground, a little fellow about as big as Pee-wee came running up and called to us. He was all excited. He shouted, “We read your signal; we saw it way up on the mountain. People said it was just the woods on fire but we knew what it meant; we read it. We’ve got a signaler in our patrol. But Major Grumpy said it was just the woods on fire.”
Harry shouted down to him, “Climb up on the band wagon and be quick about it if you want to be in at the finish. Where’s the rest of your bunch?”
Pee-wee said, “Troop, not bunch; don’t you know anything about the scouts?”
Harry said, “Excuse me, I mean gang.”
That kid said that most of them were peeking through the fence of the parade grounds, because they had been chased out. He said one of them went in to tell Major Grumpy about the smudge message and that he had been chased out again. He said they had dandy ice cream cones in there; he said the ice cream went way down into the point. Oh, boy, that’s the kind I like. He said that one of them had enough ice cream in it for two fellows; gee, I’ve never seen any like that. But I’ve seen fellows that have room enough for two cones.
Poor little kid, he didn’t have any scout suit or anything—only just a scout hat.
Harry said, awful nice and friendly sort of, he said, “Well, you just climb up here. So you read that message, hey? Well, you and your outfit are all right, Kiddo.”
“Not outfit!” Pee-wee yelled.
Harry said, “Excuse me, I mean sewing circle.”
I guess that kid thought Harry was crazy; anyway we don’t need anybody to tell us we’re crazy, because we admit it.
That kid said, “Have you got tickets to get into the grounds?”
“Tickets?” Harry said. “What do we want tickets for when we’re going to roll up the parade ground and take it home with us. Who are you for? The Grand Army or the Boy Scouts? We don’t want any hyphens here.”
Poor little kid, he looked more like a period than a hyphen. He was kind of scared of Harry, I guess.
Harry said, “We’ve got six scouts, about a dozen veterans, two bloodhounds, nine actors and one scarecrow. Do you think we’re afraid?”
“Surrender! That’s what we’re here for,” Rossie said.
“Surrender with indemnity,” Harry said.
Poor little kid, he looked all around from one of us to another and then kept staring at Brent. I guess he didn’t know what to make of him. Maybe he thought Brent was a camouflaged cannon, hey?
When we got to the parade ground there were autos and wagons standing around and lots of people going in. There was a sign up that said there wouldn’t be any show on account of the railroad strike. And there were about a half a dozen poor little codgers peeking in through cracks in the fence; honest it made me feel sorry just to see them. Two or three of them had on scout hats, but most of them only had scout badges.
Gee whiz, Harry Domicile didn’t care about anybody; all the people, even the doorkeepers, began staring at us but he should worry. He shouted to those kids, “Fall in line, you; reenforcements are here! Two companies of war-worn veterans, one Uncle Tom’s Cabin troupe, two bloodhounds, six boy scouts, and a scarecrow! Climb aboard. On to victory!”
“And a popcorn bar!” Pee-wee shouted. Jiminies, already he had bought one of those sticky things and he was all gummed up like a piece of fly-paper. He had to hold one of his hands out flat with the fingers all apart, it was so sticky. “We’ll take all the lemonade booths and candy counters and everything!” he shouted. “We’ll show no mercy, hey?”
I said, “Shut up, you Hun! Already that popcorn bar looks like Rheims Cathedral.”
He shouted, “I’ve got a chocolate stick, too, and I’m going to devastate that!”
Talk about frightfulness!
I guess those poor little kids thought we were crazy. Brent stood up on the seat of his car and made gestures so as his long sleeves flopped every which way. He shouted, “Every new recruit report to the commissary general and receive six rounds of peanuts and three rounds of licorice jaw-breakers. Step up!”
Oh, boy, you should have seen those veterans laugh; they just chuckled—you know the way old men do. One of them said he had fought at Gettysburg but that he had never seen anything like this before; oh, boy, didn’t he chuckle!
I don’t know when Brent got them, but anyway, he had the pockets of that crazy old coat full of bags of peanuts, and he handed them around to all those little fellows. He made those kids stay in his car, too. They all started eating peanuts, but just the same they looked sort of scared, as if they didn’t know what was going to happen.
Harry climbed up on top of the van and began shouting to all of us who were in the touring cars; gee, but those cars were crowded. About a hundred people were crowding around us too, just staring and laughing; you couldn’t blame them. But what made me laugh most of all was to see those veterans—good night! Even when they were getting wounded in the Civil War, I bet they didn’t have nearly as much fun.