HEADING HIM OFF

An absentee soldier at West London police court complained that he had not been able to get a decent dinner at the police station and that he was hungry.

“Well, I like to show consideration to men serving their country,” said the magistrate. “Would you like something now?”

“Yes, I could do with tea and bread and butter,” the soldier answered.

“All right,” said the magistrate, but the soldier amended his request.

“Can I have tea, bread and butter and cheese?” he asked.

“Oh, yes,” said the magistrate, laughing, “but take him away, jailer, before he asks for champagne and oysters.”