NOT ON THE MENU

A gentleman in khaki, just back from France, rambled into a restaurant. After glancing over the bill of fare, he looked around the room for a waiter.

“Yes, sir,” said the waiter, sliding over in response to his call with a glass of water and a napkin.

“Tell me, waiter,” remarked the soldier, “have you got frogs’ legs?”

“No, sir,” was the rather unexpected answer; “it is rheumatism that makes me walk like this!”