WOE ON THE WHEEL.
There was a "scorching" girl, who came down an awful purl,
And scarified her nose, and scarred her forehead.
She thought, when first she rode, biking very, very good,
But now she considers it horrid!
Winny (one mile an hour) to Annie (two miles an hour). "Scorcher!"
The Favourite of the Motor-Cars.—Petroleum.
In England, says a French writer, motoring is not considered a sport because it does not involve killing anything. This is but one more example of Continental aspersion.
As a result of his trip over the Gordon-Bennett course, the Roman Catholic Archbishop of Dublin now recommends the motor-car for pastoral visits. This will be no new thing. For years past some people have looked on the motor-car in the light of a visitation.
Cycling Conundrum.—Q. What article of the cyclist girl's attire do a couple of careless barbers recall to mind?
A. A pair of nickers.
Motorists are still expressing their indignation at a recent disgraceful incident when one of their number, because he could not pay a fine at once, was taken to prison, and forced to don ugly convict garb in the place of his becoming goggles and motor coat.
Engineer. "There's certainly a screw loose somewhere."
Simple Simon (with gleeful satisfaction). "He-he! I knaws where 't be too!"
Car Owner (intensely interested). "What do you mean, boy?"
Simple Simon. "He-he! Why I've got 'un! All the folks say as 'ow I've got a screw loose somewheres!"