LITIGATION
Litigation—
To the lawyers brings elation,
To the clients consternation,
To the counsel animation,
To the “devil” reputation,
To the usher agitation,
To the jury aggravation,
To the witness indignation,
To the judge consideration,
To reporters expectation,
To the loser lamentation,
To the winner exultation,
To the public information.
Professional Caution.—Mr. Bluebag (out for a day’s shooting with his articled clerk). “Stop a minute—don’t fire!—let’s see if that bird’s in the schedule!!”
Legal Intelligence.—A smart young articled clerk, hearing it stated by a lecturer that “man is merely a machine,” remarked, “Then I suppose an attorney may be said to be a suing machine.”
A Case to which a Barrister objects.—A fee-nominal one.
“A Bar Mess.”—Recent difficulties about latitude of counsel in cross-examination.
The real Nine Points of the Law.—Costs.
Open to Conviction.—A prisoner at the bar.
Definition of “Stuff and Nonsense.”—A junior urging a ridiculous plea.
The Wheel of Misfortune.—The treadmill.
“Contempt of Court.”—Neglecting to attend a Levée.
A Safe Precaution.—No boating party should be without a lawyer. In case of accident, he is the man for ba(i)ling out the water.
Hilary Term commences January 11.
Playing at Draughts.—The ventilation of our Law Courts.
The most lasting Stuff for a Silk Gown.—A Chancery suit.
A Bar’s Rest.—The Long Vacation.
The only Profession where there isn’t “The ‘Devil’ to Pay.”—The legal.
Faculty of Advocates.—Speech.
A Legal Conveyance.—The police van.