SONG OF THE SLIGHTED SUITOR
Oh, where, and oh where is my learned counsel gone?
He’s gone to the Queen’s Bench where a case is coming on,
And it’s oh, in my heart, that I wish my case his own.
What fee, and what fee did your learned counsel clutch?
Five guineas on his brief he did not think too much;—
And it’s oh! if he’s a barrister, I wish he’d act as such.
In what court, in what court is your learned counsel found?
I cannot catch him anywhere, of all he goes the round;—
And it’s oh! in my heart, that to one I wish him bound.
What excuse, what excuse can your learned counsel make?
None at all, none at all, but his head he’ll gravely shake,
And it’s oh! in my heart, that the fee he’s sure to take.
Conversation in Chancery Lane.—Dull Youth. I say, what’s a legal digest?
Bright Youth. Why, you fool, it forms part of the legal course—for instance, every barrister, after he has eaten his terms, has to go through his digest!
A Firm Conviction.—Transportation for life.
Bar Gold.—Fees to counsel.
It was rather too bad, you know, that Larkins serving poor Jones like this! And his first circuit, too!
LEGAL IMPROVEMENTS
In order to husband our judicial staff, in future a judge will be expected to hear two cases at the same time.
Portrait of a judge trying a theatrical cause célèbre, and a nice question as to a “remainder-man” and a “tenant in tail male.”
The Best Game for Junior Barristers to Play.—Follow my leader.
Waiting for an Answer.—What is the difference between eating your words and eating your terms.
“May it please your ludship, I ask that the witness be forced to produce the papers that were burnt!”
A Knowing Beggar.—A beggar posted himself at the door of the Chancery Court, and kept saying: “A penny please, sir! Only one penny, sir, before you go in!” “And why, my man?” inquired an old country gentleman. “Because, sir, the chances are, you will not have one when you come out,” was the beggar’s reply.